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male
age
51-59,
*ixboy
writes:For the past year or so I have dreampt of being with my wifes 22 yr old neice, Her and I spent a weekend together in July and the tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. Ironically, I do believe it came from her too as when she was leaving me she hesitated for a long time to actually leave. I want her enough that if it were to ever happen I would be very interested in getting her pregnant. My problem is IF it is to happen I am not sure how to broach the subject with her. it seems to me that we both may want it but if it isnt what she wants I am afraid of ruining our relationship. I am hoping to get some comments... Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2016): Oh hell no, that is so wrong what you are thinking. Fix your relationship with your wife...
A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (7 November 2012):
Let me get this straight: you think you and this girl are going to ride off in the sunset with romantic music playing in the background...based on one encounter that wasn't even intimate?
I'll be frank with you: even if she were attracted to you there's no way she'd welcome you with open arms and let you impregnate her just like that. She's half your age: her biological clock is not ticking. She's probably finishing up her studies or thinking about her career. And let's be honest here: at her age there are a lot of younger guys to pick from who are better suited to the life phase she's in now.
Look, if you are unhappy in your marriage, stop playing pretend and end it. Don't betray your wife, but file for divorce first. A real man would at least be capable of that much.
After that you can try your luck with the girl. I doubt anything will come of it though. If she's decent she'll tell you to take a hike.
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male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (6 November 2012):
You don’t talk about your wife at all here. Have you separated? If not then perhaps you should instead be thinking of how much this will hurt her and, if you’re going to leave her, how you will do this in the least painful way for her.
What exactly do you want to happen with this niece? The only thing you’ve got to go on is that she paused for a while before saying good-bye after a weekend together. What happened on this weekend? Presumably you’re not having a relationship with her yet. Therefore why are you already thinking about getting her pregnant? And how interesting, that you talk about being interested in getting her pregnant. No talk of “us having a child together,” just you getting her pregnant. This is a fantasy, you’re not thinking remotely rationally and you could be putting a great deal at risk if you don’t pull yourself together and get over this infatuation. You can start to get over it by accepting it’s never going to happen.
I wish you all the very best.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2012): for crying out loud, please don't encourage this guy...that's all he needs is one green light to justify going through with this.
I agree with so very confused....
Go ask you wife how you should go about making this happen.
And PLEASE get back to us and let us know what her advise was...but sorry, we aren't going to be able to help you find a place to stay when you get kicked out because your marriage is over and you have an order of protection against you from your niece's family.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2012): Go get some help. This girl could be your own daughter...would you want a man your age seeking her out in the manner you are speaking? I realize by your post this is beyond your thinking. It's quite perverted and you need help. For her, the idea of an "older man" is appealing, that's really all. However, you are not using your common sense and don't seem to have any morals. If my husband (not their dad) even looked at my daughters or nieces in that way, he would get kicked out in a heartbeat.
Pull yourself together and act like a real man, and move on. Do NOT under any circumstances allow yourself to be alone with her...ever. Be a responsible adult and don't screw up HER life with your perverted sexual fantasy and your wife's life with this nonsense.
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (6 November 2012):
 Yeah I think Eyeswideopen is right.
Not that the Aunts sign any kind of ethical pact or anything before writing on DC; still my guess is that no, most of us will not feel like teaching you how to bone and get pregnnat your 22 y.o. niece behind your wife's back.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (6 November 2012):
 Have you asked your wife for advice on how to nail her niece… I’m sure she knows better than anyone what the young lady would like in terms of a dirty old MARRIED man going after her.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (6 November 2012):
 I just like the part where you say you are hoping for some comments...you must be a first timer to DC...heh heh
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female
reader, misLadYd..  +, writes (6 November 2012):
 hell no... Dont even think about it. You have a wife plz
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2012): I don't agree with the posters who are judging you for this. We can't control who we become attracted to. It just happens. And the "forbidden fruit" is the most tempting. Liking a family member of your spouse's is actually a quite common fantasy. I think it happens mainly because that's a person they know they can NEVER have, because it would cause way too much drama in the family.
Anyway, I'm sure if you could turn off your feelings for her and only be attracted to your wife, then you would. Am I right?
Keep it a fantasy and you are okay. However, I suggest cutting contact with her. The more you see her, the more difficult it will get to resist the temptation to tell her your feelings, or make a move on her.
Just remember, you are NOT a douche bag. You are a human being that's going through a difficult time right now. If you MUST be with the niece, then by all means do so. But, make sure you are separated from your wife first. Something else to consider before you make your final decision is that the reality of being with her may not be nearly as wonderful as the fantasy. Our minds can come up with all kinds of great scenarios with someone we have feelings for, but sometimes actually being with them just isn't as good. It could start out just as good as you imagined. Then later on, you might discover she's boring, a nag, or just all-in-all a total pain in the neck to live with. Spending a weekend with someone just isn't enough time to really know how it would be to live with them.
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male
reader, MrShinra +, writes (6 November 2012):
The age difference? I could care less. It's normal to fantasize, at the very least to find her attractive. But what is wrong with you? You're MARRIED! If you can't control yourself, get divorced and go after someone else. Stay away from her family. That would be the honorable thing to do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2012): "How do I tell my wife's 22 year old niece that I want to be with her?"
You don't. You don't even tell your EX-wife's twenty-two year old niece that you want to be with her. Ick! Eww!
"I want her enough that if it were to ever happen I would be very interested in getting her pregnant."
I very much doubt that she would be very much interested in raising her kid as her married-baby-daddy/uncle-by-marriage's son/daughter and great-nephew/great-niece, and her aunt's great-nephew/great-niece and step-son/step-daughter. Eww! Ick!
I suggest you seek counselling. This is a very unhealthy fantasy that could hurt a lot of innocent people while tearing your family apart. DO NOT GO THERE!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2012): The only advice you are going to get on here is TO STAY WITH YOUR WIFE AND LEAVE THAT LITTLE GIRL ALONE! Its bad enough you are considering cheating but with her family member?! You are the worst kind of scumbag. I hope this is a joke because nobody is going to tell you how to do that.
I hope you don't have a daughter because I hope she run like hell from a man like you. Such a douche bag!
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