A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok some parenting advice please!!My daughter is 4 1/2years old and currently going to pre school 3 1/2 hours a day(due to start full time in sept). She is a lovely little girl but she has a very short attention span!Her teacher has told us that she just does not listen in class,and when told to sit crossed legged and stop talking the teacher feels she ignores her completely!!!I know this is true as she does the same at home.We have tried to sit her down and talk to her about this,we have taken a treat away and have tried shouting(which i hate and know it doesn't work).What can we do???Please if anyone has any tips i'm all ears!Thanks. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys!Some of your suggestions have really helped!Thanks alot :)
A
male
reader, unclezak +, writes (2 May 2009):
I'm a teacher and i'd say it is partially the teacher's fault for asking a 3.5 yr old to sit cross legged for a long period of tme. Some kids can't do it, and are not at their best when told to sit silently and watch/listen. They need to fiddle about and this should be facilitated in a way that she can still be engaged.
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A
male
reader, MyWife,MyLife  +, writes (1 May 2009):
My children did similar things and it was because they were children. I don't mean to under complicate things but why is she being asked to sit crossed legged anyway? My 3rd daughter was very short of attention and my Grandmother told us to try limiting T.V and I would assume video games too. The second part of her advice was to do fun and constructive activities with her that teach her focus i.e. fix something around the house, flower picking on a long walk, reading books together etc... It was very effective and as much as a doctor most certainly would have gone with ADD, 2-3 months of constructive activity worked better than any prescription would have. She's now a statistician.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (1 May 2009):
 I think lots of children of her age have a short attention-span. I think you should focus on rewarding the good behaviour (star charts leading to a sizeable reward after 10 have been awarded). She is definitely of an age where she can relate to that. Instead of shouting, try ignoring her when she is bad, with loads of praise when she is good. You also need to work with the teacher on this issue so there is a consistent approach in nursery and at home. The teacher sounds a little inexperienced if she is having trouble with your daughter. I would recommend she excludes her from the classroom for a very short period every time she disobeys in a significant way. Exclusion from 'attention' of other children and the teacher is an appropriate technique for her age. Try not to worry so much because once she starts school there will be teachers with more experience of a range of children. It could be that she is a bright child who is very bored in class. It may also be the case that she has ADHD, although as others have said this is over-diagnosed and I wouldn't go down the pill-popping route just yet! I would wait for her to start school and if problems persist then talk to the SENCO (special education needs coordinator) as every school has one.
I also suggest you take a look at her diet - try adding fish oils supplements as these are clinically proven to be effective at treating childhood attention problems (there are child-friendly supplements in most health food shops) as well as cutting out her sugar content drastically. As you will probably know, there are lots of hidden sugars in lots of products such as cereal. I know my little boy explodes at the mere whiff of white chocolate.
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A
female
reader, pebble +, writes (1 May 2009):
 I think Gina is talking about 'Supernanny' Jo Frost. Her techniques do seem really effective - but then again it is a tv show.Her website is www.supernanny.com - there's lots of good advice on there. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, niki20  +, writes (1 May 2009):
 talk to her pediatrician. i know meds cant always be the answer but she?could have ADD or ADHA. and her dr could perscribe stuff to calm her down and pay attention, but only put her on it if you feel she could benefit. good luck
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): It sounds like she is hyper? If so maybe you should take her to see a doctor, she may have a Hyperactivity disorder of some sort.Or cut down on the amount of sugar she's allowd. Reward systems work too, you could intice her to behave with rewards, e.g tell her that if you get three good reports home from her teacher she'll get a present at the end f thw week. Hope that helps.
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female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (1 May 2009):
 take her to the doctors perhaps she has hearing problems?
or she could just be a rebellious little toddler
try getting counselling?
maybe something is troubling her.
perhaps she doesn't get along with some children at her school.
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