My girlfriend has changed since we moved in together!
Q. ok me and my girl friend been together four years and every thing was going well until the past 8 months when we got our on place she has changed and pushes me out the door this christmas when her mom and sister comes makein there self right at home ...
A. 22 December 2010: She "hits" you? Easy answer. Move out. Domestic violence is never acceptable and should not be tolerated. If you feel that you cannot just move out, have her speak to a professional or seek couples counselling.... (read in full...)
Is it ok for me to date my ex's brother?
Q. I was involved with someone for about 1 1/2 years. I was very much in love with him, but it turns out that he did not feel the same. He lied to me, betrayed me, caused me great financial stress, suffered an emotional breakdown that landed me in ...
A. 22 December 2010: Cerberus may be correct in saying there is nothing "morally, spiritually or even physically" wrong with dating your ex partners brother, but there 'may' be an ethical problem with it. Ultimately it is up to you (and I do wish you all the best in ... (read in full...)
Stuck in a comfort eating cycle! Help!
Q. Please help, I've been putting on weight and I can't stop. I've got myself into a comfort eating cycle and it's making me feel really down. I've got exams coming up and I'm feeling really stressed, plus I have my job which is really busy at the ...
A. 22 December 2010: Dear anonymous, there are a number of things that we all have to realise about ourselves. We are beautiful. We all have our limits and our weaknesses. Eating is a weakness for many people, and compulsive eating is a reaction to stress. It is not ... (read in full...)
My fantasy for another man turns him off
Q. I am in my 30's and my husband thinks that I am the ice queen. He has told me numerous times that he thinks I need to be bolder in my sexuality. I finally told him that what really turns me on is fantasising about sleeping with another man (spe...
A. 22 December 2010: Eek. Well done on the honesty (I suppose), but methinks that maybe you went just a little far (read: 'way too far') with the description of the fantasy. Maybe he really regrets asking now. Look, we all fantasize; it be healthy. Feminists hate that... (read in full...)
I didn't get to sleep with her when she was a virgin!
Q. Dear reader, my question concerns a deep psychological anxiety which I suffer from. In my more rational moments I know that it is immature, petty and even silly. But we are human and often the chaos of the psyche escapes into the lived reality of ...
A. 19 December 2010: Dear Truffle31, thank you for this post. Unless this 'trauma' is 'acting out' I doubt that we need counselling as so many would impose. The key is that we see a number of things clearly. The 'lack' which we perceive in the Other is not a real lack. ... (read in full...)
How to Get Over Jealousy
Q. What's difficult about retrograde jealousy, is that it really has little to do with person towards whom you're directing those feelings. If you're a jealous person, then you'll find a reason to be jealous. It's true, isn't it? Imagine Jesus' ...
A. 18 December 2010: Dear friend, you are right and you are wrong. Your humorous allusion to the Nativity scene was nice, but there are few documented cases of virginal conception. There are even fewer Joseph's in this world who would be entirely kosher with their ... (read in full...)
My girl friend is sending naked pictures of herself to her ex. Is that cheating?
Q. So the girl I've been dating for 6 months now has been sending naked pictures to her ex, and having conversations with him while telling him that she loves him too, and that he should come over to have sex with her, all while telling me that she's ...
A. 18 December 2010: Dear friend, the prognosis - I am afraid - is not good. Nudity in digital form is pornography, unless it is artistic and for the consumption of the artistic community. In this case it seems that the former is the intention. Thus your current ... (read in full...)
I didn't get to sleep with her when she was a virgin!
Q. Dear reader, my question concerns a deep psychological anxiety which I suffer from. In my more rational moments I know that it is immature, petty and even silly. But we are human and often the chaos of the psyche escapes into the lived reality of ...
A. 18 December 2010: Thank you all very much for the considerate responses, they are mostly articulate and well meant. Thank you for this kindness. I do not believe that this is a problem that specifically requires the help of a professional; as I have said, "it is ... (read in full...)
I've lost the spark with my b/f, but it's there with his friend
Q. Hi everyone. I have a relationship problem. I've had a boyfriend for almost 2years (I am 19 now) I love him dearly and he loves me. He is sweet, kind and I'm his everything. His dad also treats me like family. However there is something missin...
A. 17 December 2010: Dear friend, there are a couple of things which I would like to say. I shall deal with those pertaining to you first. Not to be cruel, but you must stop thinking with your genitals! You know yourself that this boy (your boy friend's best friend) ... (read in full...)
How can I deal with my problems? Her past haunts me and makes me so jealous!
Q. I have been talking to a girl online for the past 8 months. We have had video, voice chats, phone chat, text chat. I first met her on a friendship site. We started talking on a messenger and soon we became close friends. And slowly the friendship ...
A. 17 December 2010: Friend, this is not an easy situation to be in. It may not come as a huge surprise that there is no concrete solution to the problem. Though it may help to know that you are not alone, many people (myself included) suffer from what is called ... (read in full...)
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