A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a good female friend that has a lot of things in common with me, and while I'm flattered that she DOES want to date me, she has a "Little" catch.... I asked her what she would want to do with me, if I got together with her.Her ONLY answer: "We'll have sex". Yeeeeahhhhhh, uh, I'm not sure, but, seems to me that there's more to dating than JUST that? Is this a red-flag? If so, should I be somewhat on my guard, if I DO take her as a girlfriend? (She's still asking me about it.).Like, it's all flattering that she wants me. But, if it's only for the sex stuff, I'm not so sure if I should accept.Any advice would be great. Thanks. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (27 July 2012):
 I agree that maybe she didn't understand what your question was about.
A
female
reader, agneeman  +, writes (26 July 2012):
 where were you when I was dating jerks? I wouldve loved to have a guy like you.
If it were me, and I said that it would be because I really liked you and thought thats what you wanted to hear. You need to ask point blank...
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (26 July 2012):
Perhaps she does want just a sexual relationship. Then again, she might have thought that was the answer you wanted to hear, or she might really want sex but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t believe there’s more to a relationship than what goes on between the sheets! Don’t try and second-guess what she meant, tell her you didn’t understand her response and ask her what kind of relationship she wants, and then tell her what you want. If you want different things, it’s best to know now so that you can call it a day before you invest anything emotionally in to a relationship.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2012): Hi,
If she's only interested in having sex when you want a relationship, you may want to reconsider dating her at all.
You shouldn't give into that because, you may find that even though it was an enjoyable experience, something is missing terribly. By that I mean, the connection and the intimacy that a good/more serious relationship could have.
I personally think that sex is definitely like the cherry on top of the cake. I'd say that a relationship that is nurturing because there is friendship is a hundred times better. Good luck! ;)
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A
male
reader, Glacier  +, writes (26 July 2012):
Easy answer: you'll have to tell her that you are not interested in just sex.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2012): Maybe she didn't understand your obscure question? I wouldn't have understood it....what were you expecting her to say?? Maybe she felt embarrassed at not understanding what you were getting at and made at attempt at flirting...give her the benefit of the doubt.
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