A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hello...My name is Leonard I am 80 years old been carrying on a relationship with my 66 year old married sister.I to am married, but we're in love. We have had sex together and will more, when we can. We both are in unhappy marrages and we live far apart, so we don't get together very often, but the sex is wonderfull. When we do, we both understand it's incest, and too old to get pregnent anymore. So in reality, what's so wrong with it? by Leon.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2009): Leonard,
Many of the other posters are quite correct that you should not be cheating on your wife and that she should not be cheating on her husband. It is the cheating here that is the main issue, not the incest. If you're both unhappily married and you both love each other then have either of you considered being honest with your current partners about not loving them any more.. you don't even have to tell your wife who you're leaving her for. Heck, at 80 you won't have a great deal of time left, but the time you do have left shouldn't be spent sneaking around behind your wifes back.
I wish you the very best of luck with your sister, but please bear in mind that what you're both doing is dishonest with your current partners.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2008): I say as long as you are both enjoying it and feel there's nothing wrong, go ahead and continue the relationship. You are both fulfiling each other's needs. You are both old enough to know what you are doing. About the only thing is that you both might want to consider getting a divorce if you are in unhappy marriages, because technically what you are doing is cheating.Also, how long have you been having this incestuous affair with your sister? Did you have any other sexual or near-sexual experences with each other when you were younger?Also, to youngiinchick527, I really liked your reply to the poster. I think you showed impressive insight and gave this man great advice. Your reply was very impressive and intelligently written. Not to many 14-year-old girls have the maturity and wisdwom you showed in your reply. Thank you for making an intelligent contribution to the discussion of this man's question.
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A
female
reader, youngiinchick527  +, writes (14 August 2008):
 ok wow this is my first comment to
anyyyyy question on DearCupid.com
and wow this question truly is a
shocker. But me being only 14 i
only know so much about sex, love
ect..ect... but yea i do know this
tho. like dont hate cuz im trying
to be possitive, i mean think of yourself
in this position (( even if you highly
doubt you would be in this position ))
but if his in love with his sister, he
should continue on doing what he does
til death. cuz sense your 80, its like
not to far from where you stand, sorry
if you think thats rude :) but um
i mean honistly tho if you take this
religiously, arent we all brothers and
sisters? so yea accually every single time
we have sex, its with our relatives. No matter
what way you put it, im right. UNLESS! you can
prove me wrong, im up for explaining, dont mind
making myself clearer about things. But come on
like i said, put yourself in his position
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A
female
reader, xalfiex  +, writes (14 August 2008):
 DUDE. Thats your sister.
Just no. If you share a gene pool, just say no. Its not right.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2008): HI my grandfather ,
i am sorry to read somthing like this , but i think you are out of being a human in the first class . second you are non-religious , these are the most reasons that may stop you from bad ideas therefore you will do anything if it is legal or illegal .
I think you sould think alot about what you have done for yourself and your sister , because it is unforgivable ,
and go back to you religion.
I am sorry if i hurt you .
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A
female
reader, love reigns! +, writes (12 August 2008):
 This is sad and disgusting, at your age as well. Consider living a purer life and other's feelings...look at the phychology damage caused to the one who had to witness this devilish act. Save these horror stories for nightmare on elm st.. You already knew what to do before you asked us...STOP! If you want support and sympathy , You wont get it from me.
Consider both of you going for counselling...there is definitely something mental going on.
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A
female
reader, hewokitty101 +, writes (10 August 2008):
this is sad. that you would do this. im only 13 but i know a little about marriage. but marraige is about love and trust and being togethere forever thats why they have the "i dos" in weddings???
well i am shocked and this is your sister your having sex with?
correct me if im wrong.
but this is nasty
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2008): Dear Waz, we can't be hypocritical, we must provide consistent advice. Gecko is totally right. If this guy was 40 and his sister was 20 we would be hitting the roof. Age does play a part. And thank you for the links, sometimes incest can provide the love and companionship that people seek..... But this guy is married and so is his sister, their are kids involved... Yes Mr Anonymous, you are having relationships with your sister, but what about her husband, your wife and the welfare of you kids. Old age dosen't give you a passport to selfishness and it dosen't let you off the hook. Cheating is cheating... If you and your sister want to be together, you have to sort your partners out.. they deserve a lot more than being tied to people who are having sex with somebody else... and remember, children need to be protected, so you need to be more discrete..
PS: BigSis, have you got a link.. we need all the details to give this guy the best advice for his particular situation.
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A
female
reader, straight to the truth +, writes (10 August 2008):
Firstly i would like to point out it is not just law and religion that say it is wrong,
There are reasons why it is against the law and that is because if children were born from it then there is an extremely high risk they would be handicapped in some way! this means us as human beings our bodies say it is wrong, the way we are built says it is wrong.
I realise at your age you are not able to have children but what this points out that bioligically this is wrong.
At any age you should know better and it is wrong to have the feeling that you want to have sex with your sister.
the feeling for love towards a sister are very different to feeling of love to a partner, they are completely different bonds.
On top of this you are both married which is another reason why it is wrong,
Need i list more reason or is this enough yet?
Instead of building a sexual relationship with your sister why not treat her as a sister and be family to one another and just be there for one another as family like you are meant to be.
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A
male
reader, Uncle Sneaker +, writes (10 August 2008):
 "In reality, what's so wrong with it?" you ask.
In reality, you are both married to other partners. Yes, I agree, the practicalities on which the incest laws are based don't enter into it. The reality is that you are both cheating on your married partners. It applies at any age. It's no worse and no better than for anyone at any other age. It's fundamentally wrong, and essentially hurtful to your spouses.
And it's no excuse to say you are both in unhappy marriages. If a marriage is so unhappy that you have to cheat, then it's time to end the marriage and go your separate ways. That too applies at any age. Your behaviour is, in my opinion, absolutely childish - like a young teen who doesn't know any better and doesn't understand about respecting the feelings of others. With your years of experience, you ought to know better. And consider how difficult and embarrassing it's all going to be as and when one of the spouses finds out and decides to drop you right in it with the legal implications of incest - sure, there's a very good chance that any court isn't going to impose any real penalty at your age, but have you considered the extreme embarrassment it's going to cause as and when it goes to court and the newspapers get hold of it?
Sort out your marriages first, and then consider whether this is really what you want to do. Then, at least, no one is likely to make too much of a fuss is you are discreet about it all. Otherwise, there's no doubt we'll all be hearing a lot more about you and your sister unless you put a stop to it fairly promptly.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2008): I agree with Uncle Phil; Unfortunately there have been a few of those around this weekend.
To the poster:You are old enough to know what is right and what is wrong!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2008): True, very true.
But I didn't mean in how this all came about, I was talking about how it would be accepted in the world socially.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2008): Your daughter saw?!
How the hell do you think shes feeling now?!
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A
female
reader, BigSis +, writes (10 August 2008):
 Bluntasaspoon....apparently his daughter did catch them at it, he said so in another thread.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2008): Your age doesn't seem a factor - age differences don't seem to matter when your that old. You've almost got this sense that your so old that its like you don't have any boundaries; you may as well go for it while you have the chance.
Yes children would've made it far more difficult in your relationship - and your age if you were younger, but you are still married, and unfortunatley age gives you no excuses with this one.
You were bound to your wife for life. She was bound to her husband for life. It may be an unhappy marriage, which is her and her husbands problem and not yours, but you are still married to your wife?!
Surely that means something?!
I think your asking this question not because you don't know but because you want reassuarance. In every question of this type I say it is socially unacceptable, your parents would be horrified and it wouldn't last long. Its illegal.
Fortunatley for you, your parents probably don't care very much anymore, I don't think it will last forever and its not like you want to be married to her.
I'm assuming you don't anyway...
To put it bluntly, this is an affair and I am against affairs. I'm not against feelings and emotions and if you actually love your sister, then you need to sit down and work out what you want to do with the rest of your life. If you only want sex, then I think you should be more of an adult - you've had a long run at being it surely you should've learnt to be one - and end an affair which would cause pain and hurt to at least two other people.
Even more unfortunately with you, if you were to leave your respective partners to 'spend your last days in happiness', you've spent your whole lives with someone else. How do you think they would feel?!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2008): I smell a fake post.
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A
female
reader, bluntasaspoon +, writes (10 August 2008):
 i think that by posting on here u are either looking for someone to tell u to stop it or are looking for acceptance. either way i wont tell u either of these things, but i will tell u how i feel about it.i think that what u 2 are doing is because u both feel unloved by your partners and as u 2 have grown up together u both know what the other wants and needs. i think that u both need to look at ur current marraiges and go do some talking to ur partners. for god sake dont tell em what u have been doing but try to explain to them what u want.after being married for so long to the same person life is bound to get a bit dull and unhappy and the only way to prevent and stop this is by communication. i hope that u 2 are happy in what u are doing but if any one finds out there could be some serious family splitting up. i know that neither of u want that, but as i said before i will not tell u to stop and i will not tell u to carry on but i will tell u that u need to sit down and talk about the consiquences of your actionsplease dont take this offensive i am only trying to helpbluntasaspoon x
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A
female
reader, Deema +, writes (10 August 2008):
 Well Leonard if you don't know by the age of 80 you never will !!!! This is a real wierd one for me. I had to read it again to see that you really did say you had sex with your sister. At first I thought you meant sister in law. Well what can we say here? You are 80 for God's sake. She's 66, neither of you are teenagers but your sense of unease tells you its not right, and legally you know its not, but like you say, she can't get pregnant, you're not hurting anyone, you're both consenting adults. Its wierd. I feel I should be giving you all sorts of reasons to not do this, but somehow at your age that seems pointless too. Does your age change things? Well if you were molesting your young sister and you were 18 and she was 16 that would be seen as very bad, but this? Did you always feel this way about her or is this just something that developed? I really don't know what to say I guess is the answer. Half of me feels like I've already said - who are we to say whats right and wrong at your time of life, but the other half just doesn't know what to say, so I guess the best answer I can give you is if it don't feel right, don't do it. If she objects, don't do it. If you are controlling her somehow, don't do it. Your feelings will always tell you if you are doing something out of line with who you are. You must be guided by them Leonard.
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