A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hello.I would assume its an issue. When I'm around my parents I'm quiet, easily annoyed and angered. I have a step-mother, with her I feel like the 3rd party ya know? I get left out with my family. Cleaning,running errands for my parents and what-knots.But when I'm around my friends ages 13-30...I know 30 right?its just that I'm very mature for my 14yr old age and I'm on xbl a lot too. When I'm around them I feel family like to them. After a week of knowing some one they tell me I'm like their little sister.Its weird...I want to be with them and Not my actual family.Why? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (21 July 2009):
 Hi there, sweetness.
You already got some great advice, but I also wanted to point out that a LOT LOT LOT of teenagers feel this way. You're 14 - it makes sense that you would rather be hanging out with your friends than your family. That's pretty normal. And it's even normal to feel like the "little sister" amongst them, and have that be so great that you feel like you almost rather have them be your family. Friends are usually a lot more fun than your family!
But, while friends come and go, your family will be the ones who are still there for you when you're 24, 35, 50. And yeah you get annoyed with your family now - again, you're a teenager. That's just what teenagers do. I went through a rough patch with my parents, at about 14, and my sister is 14 now - I see it happening all over again. Things will get better and more solid. You're just figuring out your own person and disconnecting from your family to do so. That's okay.
But remember that your family is your family, they love you and they'll always be a great force of strength and support behind you. Maybe you'll quibble and get annoyed, slam a few doors, they're still going to be there for you in the morning. And remember, sometime you may not LIKE your family, but you should always remember to LOVE your family. I think that it's a great idea to try to reconnect with them in little ways, but you do need space to grow up and do your own thing. Don't assume that you know it all, but you're getting older and need a little independence. Why not hang out with your friends until 6:00, then catch dinner with your Dad? Or, take your sister out shopping or something?
Good luck, sweetness!
A
female
reader, sugar_sugar +, writes (21 July 2009):
 I must agree with lovestruck.Family may not always behave as you would like them to, or offer the same kind of entertainment and companionship that friends do, but despite your differences with your family members I bet they would do anything for you - and I do mean anything.I can relate to you, my family might not make me as happy as my friends do on a daily basis but I know if anything ever happened to me, they would be the first there. If I ever really need anything in life I know they will be the ones to provide it. I'm sure your family are the same, it's an unusual and often very trying bond - but there is nothing else like it.You should be glad you've got a family away from home, but be sure to appreciate the one you were born into as well :)
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (21 July 2009):
 probably because you feel more connected with these other people probably because you feel they are more caring towards you.
maybe you've got issues with your step mother?
maybe that's why you feel like a third party because perhaps you feel your dad gives her more time than he gives you.
it's not a nice feeling i know but if you feel your x box people are more family i guess it's cool but you do need to be careful with things like that.
i guess you find it alot easier to talk to them than with your own family.
:)
hope this helps.
x ilovebowsandcherries x
message me you want to talk further :)
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A
female
reader, love-struckxo  +, writes (21 July 2009):
 Friends are like family away from home. They often treat you as part of there own. You eat at there houses, shower, and borrow there clothes. That's just what friends do.
I have only developed a few friendships like this in my life time and I don't take them for granted. I appreciate that I feel comfortable enough in my friends home that I can call them a 'second family'
Now with that being said.. You may have your friends, but you do need your family too. Try not to forget that. I would suggest rekindling relationships with your family members if this bothers you. Ask your dad to go out for supper with just you and him one day.
Yes friends are nice, but your family WILL ALWAYS be there for you. Tomorrow your best friend could sleep with your boyfriend and your friendship would be kicked to the curb like that.
I'm not saying she will, it's just an example and to answer your question. You feel like your friends are more like your family, because there is clearly something lacking amongst you relationships with your family. If this bothers you, then talk to them about it.
Good Luck
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A
male
reader, kurtyz +, writes (21 July 2009):
 dude i have the same problem but this is your story not mine so i think its because they might seem to treat you with more respect and they dont hit you like an older brother would and they are there for you when no one else is because i no that is why i rather my friends to my family and remember you are not the only fourteen year lod guy who is on xbl with his friends and tends to rather them to his family cause im the exact same as you. so goodluck and if you need help just message me im always here.
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