A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Does anyone have any feelings, opinions or advice on this? What would you do in this situation?I have a friend who is a mom of one of my girls' friends. We have gotten to know each other pretty well. We carpool to the kids' sports activities, etc. She always asks me when she needs to borrow something or when she needs a favor. When she has weekend plans, etc., my feelings are hurt because we are never included. A lot of times, though, they get together with a certain group of friends, and these are friends of hers from high school and are a very defined group. Or sometimes they do not do the inviting.But my feelings are still hurt. When you get to know people rather well and do certain things together, you just expect a little more friendliness in return. What do you all think? Am I expecting too much?Feeling Down in Durango Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Your friend  +, writes (22 July 2009):
 I wouldn't ask her if you are a friend as she will say yes but it will seem strange too. Why is it so important that this particular person ask you out and why are you focussed on this? Is there something you need to look at within yourself. I'd be interested to get a further response.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to those who responded. I guess that it is one of those situations where you have to be here and have to know the person who I am talking about.
Regarding my friend's weekend activities, she never talks about them with me. She makes it seem like her weekend plans are a big secret. I don't think she would appreciate it if I invited myself to come along. Yet, somehow, I feel that she does consider me a friend. Maybe not--maybe I'm just someone she uses when she needs something. Would you think I should ask her if she considered me a friend. What would it accomplish? Of course, she would say, "yes" to avoid hurting my feelings. Or maybe she would have a broader answer considering that she always says what she thinks.
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A
male
reader, Your friend +, writes (21 July 2009):
No one including yourself will be invited into the tight school click, they are all like that so don't be offended. For other activities she may not think you would be interested unless you somehow let her know. Maybe you could invite her and another friend she knows for coffee and work from there. I don't think there is any unfriendliness here.
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (21 July 2009):
 Not at all but why not ask her if you can come along?
or organize something yourself and invite them along and maybe it can be a vice versa thing.
say you organize something for you all to do and then she does the same but you should really ask just say "any plans this weekend?"if she says she's organized something say "oh that sounds good mind if i come along?" i'm sure she won't turn you down and say no.
hope this helps :)
x ilovebowsandcherries x
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