A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 15 and i have never kissed a boy before. All my friends are now having sex and i have never even kissed one. They always tease me and i dont like being round them when they are talking about things like that. Do you have any suggestions about what i could say to them when they ask me? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2007): it's ok love, i've never kissed a girl either, i'm 14, my mates and my gf ave done loads of sex stuff and i feel jealous badly, but don't let it get to you, after all, the longer you wait, the better the first time will be.
A
female
reader, hails +, writes (21 February 2007):
 well i was the same as you to. i thought they were all stupid for having sex at such a young age and making it into a competiton on whod do more, id never even kissed a boy at your age either an sometimes they asked me questions, you should be proud of yourself for not following the crowd and maybe some of your friends are makin it up to look good
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2007): Hi Sweetie,They just think they're 'cooler' than you because they've had sex and you havent kissed a boy. I think you've made a good dicision. Everyone is so hung up on sex and they act like its a competition or something, its pathetic. They probibly threw away there virginity and now regret it, and you have nothing to regret, wait for the right guy and you'll be very happy with your dicision that you made. They arn't very good friends if you ask me, they shouldnt be teasing you, they should be telling you that you'll find the right guy for your first kiss and your first time at sex and it'll be great. Dont let them get to you, girls like to gossip and use anything they can against others. When they ask you again, dont them they know it bugs you. They'll keep doing because they know it gets to you. They will stop if you dont show any reaction to it. It shouldnt bug you and its none of there business anyway, its your choice and not theres. They should be minding there own business and its not a big deal at all that you havent kissed a boy yet. The right boy will come along and you'll never want to stop kissing him. Trust me.. it'll be great. haha. Then you can rub it in your friends faces, because you waited for the right guy and they didnt.Best of luck sweetie. Your first kiss will be unforgettable.
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female
reader, lola manola +, writes (4 February 2007):
 I had exactly the same problem. chill out. dont worry about it. if someone teases you laugh it off, there immature and one day theyll realise it. try NOT to build sex up into something scary, trust me its not! but go with the flow do it when your ready. some girls i know at 19 are still virgins cos theyve not met the right guy, and do you know what? i am so jealous of them! they have such will power and control (also note, men find virgins sexy). but when you do do it, let it be because you want to not because you want to stop them teasing, trust me theyll tease u even more if you do it to please them. also note, girls lie, alot, about having sex. you dont need to do this cos hopefully ure more mature than them and can just say, "im a virgin, and im happy". some people are just late developers, i was, and im so happy i gave my virginity to someone i loved when i wanted to. hope thid helped sweet x
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2007): You are only 15 there are lots of things at that age to look forward to - LIFE!
Just don't be in a hurry they will come to you when the time is right. Your first kiss will be special as will the first time you do everything else. Just embrace every moment as it comes along and don't fret about it not being there yet - plenty time.
Take care
xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2007): studies show that girls who keep their virginity till they are over 18 are more likeley to be successful, more intelligent and make more money...statistically speaking... so not that your friends are unintelligent, or trashy or you know... but really.. you just have a better chance if you focus on the things that matter right now in that stage in your life... wait till you are older and you can find the right one to share that "moment" with- and it will be them who are having the regrets- cause its very very very rare and unlikely that anyone can find a long term or "real" realtionship in highschool- sometimes not even in college... so wait it out.. and go off your comfort.. dont put in to their pressure.. cause in the end you will come out the winner.. never do anythign to please someone else.. only do things that show you respect yourself and your body and you will show true confidence, sass, intelligence and appeal that way. go your own way and good luck!
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reader, Yos  +, writes (2 February 2007):
 This is a hard thing to explain. But try to understand. When someone teases you it's because they are unhappy. When someone tries to make you feel bad it's because they themselves feel bad and want to push that feeling onto someone else. To make it go away, to make it not their problem. It's a very human thing to make our problems other peoples problems.
There are two reasons your girlfriends might be doing what they are doing.
The first is because they have had sex and they're not happy about it. Inside, in themselves, for themselves. 15 is young to have sex. Sex stirs up a lot of complicated and difficult emotions. You can feel very ready to have sex at 15 but when you have it it unleashes feelings that are very difficult to handle. It's totally ok to feel young and inexperienced about this. Look at all the messages on this site and realise that sex is never easy, there are 50 year old people here that are still struggling with it. Relationships and sex aren't easy. It's always difficult, but you change a lot as a teenager and in your twenties, and those changes make sex better and more comfortable.
It's possible that some of your friends have had sex and have a lot of difficult feelings because of it. And they're teasing you because it makes them feel in some way better. If this is what's going on, try to realize that its about them and not about you.
The other thing that could be going on is that they are lying. We all feel that we should be having sex, and that if we're not then in some way we are failing. Because of this we sometimes pretent that we are having sex when we are not.
I had sex for the first time when I was 17. Most of my friends told me they had already had sex. But when I had sex (at 17), and talked to them about it, I realized that they were not telling the truth. They were pretending. It's funny how when you actually have sex, you realize how many of your friends were pretending.
Either way, when you have sex and who you have it with is your own personal business. It's up to you, and only you. It's not about how old you are, or what your friends say they have done (true or not). And it's really not about what your friends think. It's only about you and the right guy, at the right time, in the right way. It's personal.
I'm a 33 year old man and know girls that first had sex at 15 and girls that first had sex at 24 and older. Now, many years later, the only thing that really matters is whether they did it when they really wanted to, and with who they wanted to. When doesn't matter. Who and how is what matters.
So, when your friends tease you, just tell them that you'll have sex when you want to with who you want to. Wait for the right guy, someone who really cares about you and treats you with love and respect. That guy is out there somewhere, you'll know when you meet him.
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female
reader, AskEve +, writes (2 February 2007):
 Don't believe everything you hear. They might just be making up stories. They've probably watched 'American Pie' too many times and their imagination's running away with them. Next time they ask you about you, brush it off as if it's boring. Tell them you like guys but you're fussy who you go out with and you've never even seen anyone you remotely fancy. That should keep them quiet!
Don't be too quick to get involved in all that relationship stuff, it will come when the time is right for you. Just because your friends are bragging about it doesn't mean it's right. You stick to your morals and your principals love. You'll probably hear the same braggers telling you how they've fallen pregnant and what on earth should they do? lol Keep well out of it and let them get on with it. ;o)
Eve
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reader, Nico +, writes (1 February 2007):
 Hi,
Peer pressure is one of the worst things you can feel as a teen, i didn't lose my virginity til quite late but i didn't let my "friends" or people at school into any of my business even if i had a g.f or done anything. It will happen in time and if they ask you any questions just say like i'm going to tell you or it's none of your business its personal, if they are true mates they won't even care what you have done or haven't done. Chin up!
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2007): thanks vina, xxx
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female
reader, vina_101 +, writes (1 February 2007):
 Hi there. Please do not feel pressured into having sex just because all your friends are doing it. Can I also say that a lot of girls at that age lie abot what they have done sexually just to impress people and to look cool. So a lot of those girls may brag about what they've done and who they've done but really they haven't done a thing and they're just as clueless as you.
If however, they are actually sexually active I think they are a bit young. But young girls nowadays don't want to wait and before they've even come out of thier training bras they're out having sex. What is the world coming to?
Anyway...so back to your question. If they start talking sexual stuff around you then just politely tell them that you'd rather not talk about that kind of thing. As you're friends they should respect your wishes and change the subject. Or you could always get up and leave and hang with your other friends.
And anyway if you are such good friends with these girls how comes they're teasing you for being a virgin? Surely they'd be more understanding.
Have fun doing what 15 year olds do and don't do anything to fit in with the crowd. Be happy with yourself and know that you're still a great person regardless of whether you're a virgin or not. And as for kissing:
One day a boy will come along and and place upon your lips a kiss. You'll always remember that moment as no kiss will be as special as this. :) It will happen one day, good things come to those who wait.
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