A
female
age
26-29,
*abii_boo24
writes:Hey!So I'm a 14 year old girl that just recently lost her virginity. Since then I have had sex with my boyfriend quite a few times. But now I'm starting to become scared. All the times we have had sex we have never used a condom. I've researched a lot about teen pregnancy and the symptoms. I have pretty much all the symptoms that I can have so far. My boyfriend doesn't know anything about this matter yet and I really don't know what to do. He's been a major ass to me lately and I want to break up with him. I'm not sure if I should though just in case I am pregnant. What should I do? Please HELP!
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female
reader, r_a_w_r1645 +, writes (14 November 2010):
 first things first. THATS DUMB! why would you have unprotected sex at 14?! he shouldve been more mature and known to use protection. secondly, dont stay with him if you are pregnant. have you ever seen teen mom on mtv? most of their bfs were jerks and it all ended up badly. if he finds out that your pregnant he will just keep being an ass and most likley leave you. i would get a pregnancy test to see if you are. and if your not, i wouldnt sugest you stay with your bf. guys shouldnt be treating girl like that.
A
female
reader, roadie42 +, writes (4 November 2010):
 If your boyfriend wasn't even responsible and mature enough to use protection, then I doubt he's going to help you get through as difficult a situation as a potential pregnancy. The fact that he's been treating you poorly doesn't help either. However, you should still tell him what's going on, because he's your partner and he has the right to know. Just don't be surprised if he takes off on you - and believe me, I'm not saying this is the right thing to do. It is, unfortunately, what happens when young people find themselves entirely unprepared in such a situation and completely scared out of their minds.Tell your parents - I cannot emphasize this point enough. It's going to be scary and they'll certainly be upset, but they can help you get through this if you are in fact pregnant. And if you're not...then please, PLEASE do some research on birth control and talk to your parents anyway. They want what's best for you, and if you're going to be sexually active whether they like it or not, it's in their best interests (and yours) to make sure you're protected.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (4 November 2010):
 Woah, woah..One issue at a time.
If you read up about teenage pregnancy you should have googled safe sex as well..that way you would know you're not of legal age of consent, that your boyfriend can be charged with statutory rape because you are a minor, and that you need to be on a form of birth control and he needs to be using a condom in order to decrease your chances of being pregnant.
Have you missed a period? Yeah, you may have all the signs of pregnancy but you're not 100% sure until you take a test. First, you need to tell your parents you think might be pregnant, so they can get you to the gyno for a blood test. If you're so frightened to tell them, then I suggest you have an older sister or a female friend like Mystiquek said take you to Planned Parenthood or any other free female health clinic, look them up in your phonebook. Tell them you think you maybe pregnant, they'll give you some forms to fill out then you'll be on your way to seeing a gyno. Now, if you're not let this be a lesson to you..to either hold off on sex because you're not responsible enough to engage in intercourse hence why they set the legal age at 16-18 varying per state. Or since you'll probably do it anyway, to get some birth control and condoms from the clinic.
However, if you test positive..don't stay with your boyfriend for the sake of the child. You don't want to e with him anyways and I doubt he's ready to be a father. Break up with him and tell him later down the road that he has a child..then you can work out visitations and he can give you child support. Then, you absolutely have to tell your parents that you are pregnant so they can help you figure out your options. If you keep it, are they going to help you out with babysitting and financially or will you have to wait and apply for state aid, which comes out of the taxpayers pockets..So I suggest you hope that they help you out financially until you can obtain a job. Which will be difficult in the American economy due to the lack of jobs available. Or you can look into other options such as an open adoption where you can still see your child at his/her adopted parents leisure. Then there's abortion, in which I would look into the risks involved, and thoroughly educate yourself before you make that choice. Those are your choices, let's hope you're not pregnant. But next time do use birth control, or practice abstinence because you might not get that lucky again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2010): you are probably pregnant. do what you would do for your relationship, but let him know about the baby. tell your parents most importantly!! and decide if you're going to raise it. if you decide not to be the one raising it put it up for adoption! don't have an abortion, it will haunt you for the rest of your life. don't make the baby pay for your mistakes... and take a test
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A
female
reader, misLadYd..  +, writes (4 November 2010):
 having sex for the 1st time means using condoms,to avoid getting pregnant,stis.if you think you are pregnant then get a home preg test to make sure.lets hope he wont freak out or leave you when you are pregnant.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2010): Children don't make broken relationships work. That's crap on TV.
The fact is that you chose to get pregnant. So now it's time to choose to deal with it as best you can. I would get an abortion since it is still early.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (4 November 2010):
 Obviously you didn't do enough research on teen pregnancy is you had sex without a condom! You would have known that there is a very high risk of pregnancy with unprotected sex. Regardless of how mature you think you are, you're still a child. And now a child possibly having a child. A little late to be scared, darling. Go talk to your parents IMMEDIATELY. You're going to most definitely need their help if you are pregnant. If you cannot talk to them, find a female family member who is older, a guidance counselor, someone older who can help you. If all else, go to a planned pregnancy center and find out what is going on. You may not be pregnant, lets hope you aren't, but you need to know. The quicker you know, the more time you have to make decisions. As far as the boyfriend goes, its your body and you will have the final say so on what happens. If he's as young as you, he really won't be much help, and more than likely will take off running for the hills. Guys his age are in no way prepared to take on a baby. Guys twice his age often aren't ready! If the damage is done, then you have to be mature enough to handle the consequences. If if you are lucky and not pregnant, GET ON BIRTH CONTROL ASAP! I hope it turns out to be just a scare. You are way too young to be having a baby. I had one at 19, and wasn't ready. Please grow up and be smart about choices that could affect your for the rest of your life.
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A
female
reader, WhateverMovesThee +, writes (4 November 2010):
 Wow...you couldn't tell him you couldn't have sex without a condom? You have a very high chance of being pregnant and you KNEW that unprotected sex led to pregnancy AND STDs...so you got yourself into this. You felt mature enough to have sex, be mature now and tell your parents. Get yourself to the nearest Planned Parenthood for a pregnancy test. Hopefully, your "symptoms" are due to stress etc. So again, take a pregnancy test. If you're not pregnant, I hope you learn from this. I know two people who wound up with HIV because they wouldn't use condoms. They are 17 and 14. You can't trust that just because someone's cute, looks healthy, and says they love you or whatever-that you can trust them with your body.
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A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave  +, writes (4 November 2010):
First and foremost you need to take a pregnancy test to find out once and for all if you are or are not pregnant.
If you are not pregnant, then for your age, you have had a lucky escape and consider it a lesson learnt about contraception.
If you are pregnant, you MUST tell your parents. Yes they may go up the wall at first, but you cannot deal with this alone.
You have to consider whether you are ready for this, because you are also still a child yourself. If your boyfriend is being an "ass" to you now, how will he react if you are pregnant.
Regardless of whether you are pregnant or not you should consider why you have been having sex without any contraception in the first place.
The other issue you may have to consider is that in the UK, it is illegal to have sex under the age of 16 and I'm sure it is the same in the US. You or your boyfriend could find yourselves in hot water if one of your parents decide to go to the police.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2010): You are probably must definatley pregnant! You had sex multiple times without a condom!..in my opinion it was a pretty idiotic thing to do considering you "know" a lot about teen pregnancy!
Prepare to tell your parents about it..good luck x
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A
female
reader, No watered down advice here! +, writes (4 November 2010):
 Please talk to your parents. I made the mistake of not talking to mines, and I don't regret my daughter I love her with all my heart,however my life has been very hard! And if he's acting like that now, he will act that way if you tell him you might be pregnant, And what ,Talkinghelp said.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2010): Take pregnancy test , were u on the pill? If not, prepare yourself for it being positive, and then decide by urself if u want it or not, then tell parents, then tell boyfriend
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