A
male
age
,
*escuer01
writes:This one is for the Ladies here ONLY!I am asking this for a friend of mines. ThanksLadies,Say if you was to go out with a guy you met and things became hot and heavy between the 2 of you,then the 2 of you end up at a place that you have picked out to have sex.You find out that he has to use a penis pump in order to get an erection,because he can't get one on his own due surgery from having prostate cancer as well as when he comes that nothing ejaculates out of his penis.Would you still have sex with him? or Would you make up an exuse to get out of having sex with him,then you 2 leave and you never try to see him again?
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male
reader, rescuer01 +, writes (10 September 2012):
rescuer01 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you ladies for your help on my friend's question.I will make sure to let him know what was said.
Thanks
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (9 September 2012):
 His girlfriend left a cancer survivor because he didn't produce semen any longer? She sounds very shallow and he is better off without her, in my opinion.
I think your friend should simply go about dating women in the usual way, then when a relationship seems to be developing, after feelings have developed, then tell her that he uses a pump to achieve an erection.
Again, most women do not reach orgasm through intercourse alone, so in some way, his achieving an erection is really more for his sexual satisfaction than hers.
He should be using condoms anyway at this stage of dating, so producing semen won't be 'important'.
I wish you and your friend continued good health.
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A
male
reader, rescuer01 +, writes (9 September 2012):
rescuer01 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy friend is in his mid 40s and the woman he was in a relationship with left him because of this plus he wasn't ejaculating anything in her.she says that she doesn't know how to take it,because she loved when he was leaving his sperm inside of her,she loved feeling him ejaculating in her and the thought of having a part of him inside of her.The woman he just had started going out left him once he told her one night while out for dinner.She never answered nor return his calls,so now he wants to find another woman to start datine,because don't want to be rejected again once he explain to her what he has to do before they can have sexual intercourse.Anyone ladies her have any advise for him about going out with any women again?He still has a sex drive,but like I said this is the things he has to do in order to have intercourse with a woman.My friend really needs some help.Thanks
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy  +, writes (8 September 2012):
 I'm assuming the scenario has already happened. I would rather know in advance than have this sprung on me in a hotel room. I really don't know how I would react though, I think it would depend on how much I liked the guy and whether he was comfortble with it. If he suddenly got all awkward and nervous, I would probably get awkward and nervous too. If he was lighthearted, it would be far more comfortable.
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A
female
reader, demeplev +, writes (8 September 2012):
 I agree it depends on the age bracket..me in my forties , as long as he wanted sex and was intrested in having a great time for both it wouldnt bother me one bit, as oppossed to an ex boyfriend who had ed and never wanted sex or to even satisfy me..ick that was awful, but yes i would continue as long as you made it great! ;) LOl Good luck peace and love
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2012): I think there are a lot of factors to be considered here
Is a naturally functioning penis a must for her? Are other means of sexual activity good enough for her too? Would the lack of the physical sign of attraction/arousal make her feel self-conscious? If nothing comes out at ejaculation, is he still able to have kids (if that's a possibility in her future, that is!)?
I'm 21, and having a pump would not bother me at all. If I liked the person, then it wouldn't make a difference to me. If I loved the man, and I saw a future with him, I'd be able to work around it
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A
female
reader, Pretty and proud +, writes (8 September 2012):
 Wouldn't bother me. Everyone needs sex.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (8 September 2012):
 If it was someone I was in a long and loving relationship with...I'd cope. If it was someone I'd just met then to be honest I probably wouldn't take things further if they were pushy about me accepting their condition and wern't offering other things like friendship, kindness and integrity...at my time of life those things are more important to me.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2012): Personally I'm not that shallow. So no it wouldn't bother me. Who knows, maybe your friend can have his partner pump the thing for him and it could be hot and heavy??
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A
female
reader, Atsweet1 +, writes (8 September 2012):
 I would try if you like each other it can work. I would somehow find a way to let this be known before the heat of the moment. I wouldn't dump someone like this just cause of that it would have to be some other factors also. Plus your hands still work so we good.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (8 September 2012):
I think this would all depend on the presentation.
First date, hot and heavy one night stand, oh by the way, I have to use a penis pump due to prostate cancer.
Fifth date, hot and heavy developing a relationship, lots of kissing, oral and manual stimulation, previous disclosure of prostate cancer diagnosis.
Two different approaches. Imagine the difference in reception at the news.
By the way, some women really want penile penetration to enjoy sex. Most do not need penis in vagina intercourse to have an orgasm. The vast majority of women do not orgasm from penile penetration alone. They orgasm from oral or manual stimulation.
I'd worry a bit about a man who has reached the age of 50+ who hasn't learned that yet....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2012): "Would you still have sex with him?"
Yes, I still would. If I got to know the guy and liked him before, why would I just change my mind after I found out he had surgery?
"Would you make up an exuse to get out of having sex with him,then you 2 leave and you never try to see him again?"
No, I wouldn't. And I think it will be pretty obvious if someone DOES do that to you. I think it would be plain as day they are lying to you, and at that point you should make sure to never see them again. Don't give them the opportunity to blow you off in the future, because they aren't worth your time.
Over all, I think you're being too hard on yourself. I don't think anyone is going to judge you.
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A
female
reader, Sinful_thinker89 +, writes (8 September 2012):
 I actually was in a relationship with a man who had ED, he was in his 20s no matter what I still liked him and the sex. I understood completely
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A
female
reader, cmarieky +, writes (8 September 2012):
Answers will vary greatly, depending on the female expectations, age, understanding, and so on. My age bracket may be a little put off by it. A younger age bracket may never accept that. A 30-40 may give or take it. A 40 plus age bracket may not be as shallow or put off by it. It all depends on the individuals involve, if there is chemistry beyond sexual then there is a possibility any age bracket may be sensitive.
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