A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Iv been seeing this guy for 2 months now and we meet up once a week, he seems nice but he never takes me out on a proper date. We only meet up for sex or heavy petting. He doesn't book a room up, we do it in the woods, Im feeling a bit used. He does email me constantly everyday and sends the odd text on my mobile but im a woman in my 30's and I think having sex in the woods is rather childish, we are not a couple of teenagers.When he emails me, he does take an interest in my life..but i feel he is still using me for sex only. What do you guys think?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2012): Well, how many orgasms are you having in those words?
How many is he having?
If the number is not relatively equal, then I think you know the answer.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2012): He has emailed me back and said that he is going to miss me, that he will miss checking his emails and text messages. I said that wasn't good enough and that he didn't make me feel special, but he said I was wrong. Anyway, im not seeing him again...he should of thought of that before he treated me like a cheap tart.
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (3 October 2012):
 Of course he sensed it. Any sane person would know it's only a matter of time before the free ride is over.
Notice how devastated he is (and notice how sarcastic I'm being). He sensed you wanted no contact and like the great guy he is he's granting it to you without a fuss.
He didn't even try to win you back by offering trite assurances of a better future.
He didn't even try.
Good for you that you ended it. Consider it lesson learned.
A good rule of thumb for the future is when it comes to dating, be old fashioned. That method has been tried, tested and true.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (3 October 2012):
 I think you are "spot-on"...that he is using you for sex.
Are you not happy with that? IF not.... then all you have to do is close your legs and tell him that you aren't going to be his convenient and available soft/warm/moist lady-place wherein he can pleasure himself....
Is that about what you wanted to know???
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (3 October 2012):
 YES he's using you!!
Why would you ever agree to have sex in the woods with him to begin with if he is such a cheapskate that he's not even willing to pay for a hotel room?
Is he married? If so, you shouldn't - and he shouldn't have any kind of relations with you anyway.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 October 2012):
 Say what?
Why do you met up with him? Why do you answer his texts? His e-mails?
IF you feel used - STOP doing it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2012): Thank you for your replys. I emailed him saying that it was over and he replied saying that he sensed I wanted no contact and that he wished me the best.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (3 October 2012):
 you have to ASK
you only meet and have sex IN THE WOODS???
OF course he's using you for sex
see what happens when you suddenly get a very heavy period that lasts for 6 weeks and can't have sex... or give blow jobs...
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A
female
reader, Ciar +, writes (3 October 2012):
Not only is he using you, but he's also hiding you. For some reason he doesn't want anyone to know of his association with you.
Honestly, I would not waste time or breath having a discussion with him about this. Delete and block him. He's a grown man and knows the difference between right and wrong. Besides, I suspect you aren't strong enough to say 'no' and stick to it so the less contact you have with him the better.
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A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (3 October 2012):
Sex in the woods is for teenagers. Sounds like he is using you, and you are letting him, which could imply you are using him as well.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (3 October 2012):
 Of course he's using you. Sex in the woods? That's really not acceptable. He's cheap and doesn't want to go through any trouble of getting a room and treating you like a lady and I have a feeling that he is also one of those who gets a kick out of doing it some place out in the open where there's a chance of getting caught. Refuse to be a part of this anymore. This is not how a decent man behaves.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (3 October 2012):
 Yes, he's using you. Sending a text takes what, 30 seconds? He is spending just a few minutes a day of "work" in exchange for sex. Asking about your day and your job does not mean he's after more than sex.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (3 October 2012):
 Trust your instincts...of course he is using you. If a man was genuinely interested in you he would be taking you out on dates, trying to impress you and get to know you. Not doing it up against a tree in the woods.
I really cant believe a) you are asking this question and b) are allowing him to take you into the woods and have sex with you, not only is it childish but it is also very dangerous, surely you must realise that having sex in the woods with a man you dont know very well is a massive risk?
Stop allowing him to use you, get some self respect and tell him that either he starts taking you out and you date like a proper couple, or you are moving on.
And learn a lesson from this - DONT SLEEP WITH MEN SO QUICKLY! If you go out on a few dates first, get to know each other, then have sex - you have far more chance of a relationship. If you agree to dates in the woods and drop your knickers for him without him even having to buy you a drink he will never take you seriously as girlfriend potential because he will think you are easy, and not the kind of girl to take home to mum.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (3 October 2012):
 Really? You are in your 30's and have to ask this? Sheesh. Sex in the woods? Come on....
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A
female
reader, lmao1989 +, writes (3 October 2012):
 If he;'s only taking you to the woods to have sex and not out for a beautiful meal on a date i think he is using you yes.
You need to end this or tell him you want to go out for a meal on a proper date if he declines he isn't the man for you.
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A
female
reader, Miss naturella  +, writes (3 October 2012):
He is definitly using you. It seems like he is cheating on his true love with you and he doesn't want to be caught with you. You have to open up your feelings and communicate about this. You are still young and deserve better than this
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (3 October 2012):
 It does sound like he is using you for sex, otherwise i think he would book a table at a nice resturant, take you to the movies, or a romantic stroll along the seafront. Sex in the woods everytime you see him is hardly the actions of someone with a longterm future relationship in mind. If you are not happy to keep doing this let your feelings be known, that you want more that just sex in the woods. If he is unwilling to change then really you have to question whether he is the one for you.
Good luck
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