A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This a rather silly question but maybe the answer will resolve a dispute between my bf and I. Is a man's orgasm more intense when he cums inside his partner? I've been with my bf for over 2 years. I never refuse him sex. I don't make him wear a condom. I generally give him what he likes in bed. My only issue is that I absolutely hate the after-sex "leakage". I have always made my partners pull out and squirt it on my belly. I keep baby wipes and hand towels in our nightstand so I can clean up after and be done with it. It's what I prefer. He was fine with it at first but now says I am robbing him of a more intense orgasm. An orgasm is an orgasm right? Cumming inside me might be a slightly different sensation on his penis but the actual orgasm has to be the same. Is he making that up for his own selfish reasons or am I the unreasonable one? We made a bet to abide by the majority opinion here so all answers will be welcomed.
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male
reader, GennaroLuv  +, writes (28 December 2012):
The leaking doesn't bother me at all! I have a very clean partner, and love the musky smell of her juice, and have a protection for my matteress on my bed. Actually, I love after we finish, just to lay in the juices!
A
male
reader, ilovehothippychicks +, writes (4 May 2012):
I know this response is a couple years late, but am a new member, so I'm just going to respond anyway, and add my opinon. I'm a guy, and drawing on my experiences, I'd have to say that my favorite way to finish is, without a doubt, to cum inside of my girlfriend. Especially if my feelings for the girl are pretty deep, and the feelings & emotions are mutual. The sex is definitely more meaninful when real passion for one another is there. My last girlfriend was on birth contol, and it was my first exprience, in the ~15 years that I've been sexually active, that I was able to intentionally cum inside of my girlfriend and not worry about her getting pregnant afterward. It was a feeling that I had ALWAYS fantasized about, and when I was finally able to experience it, it was everything I had always dreamed it would be and more. There is nothing like the feeling of an orgasm deep
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2008): It's more intense inside (for me anyway), especially if your partner is coming at the same time.
And tissues... suck the last drops for half a minute out of his penis, once you did this for him, he will offer you a different smile
still smilling :):)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2008): Personally I feel that its more intense inside the vagina... thats just me.
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A
female
reader, survivor1987 +, writes (14 December 2008):
I dont know if his is, but it sure is for me..we end sex with him inside me usually and we come together.. I like that I can grip him while I am coming, its so hot!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2008): coming inside is not more intense BUT it is more enjoyable for a guy. personal opinion only
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (13 December 2008):
 On the contrary, "TasteofIndia" did not say that pulling out would prevent pregnancy - reread it - she correctly cautioned otherwise, and her answers and advice are consistently excellent here.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2008): YES it is much more intense inside than out. An orgasm isn't just an orgasm as you've been thinking.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (13 December 2008):
My vote: Inside!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2008): On intensity I believe it'll vary from person to person. The problem however is that it's irritating - and I'm surprised why you wouldn't understand that.Imagine it this way, if women made a mess like men did, and he pulls out right at the moment before you orgasmed, and you ended up having to continue it by yourself - how would 'you' feel?To put it simply in an exaggerated manner it's like having a static shock before an orgasm, irritating and annoying.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2008): I just want to say that what TasteofIndia about pulling out will NOT prevent pregnacy. Oh and that guysand girls feel more connected if the guy orgasm is inside the girl. But it really is what you n your parter like. maybe to satisfy him you could do like a every other time thing the 1st time you have sex he pulls out the 2nd he stays in. then your both getting what you want but also giving in to the others needs/wants. hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, tux +, writes (12 December 2008):
 Well I will start by saying this... You are asking if he is making it up for his own selfish reasons.... My question is.... Are you asking that to justify your own selfish reasons to make him finish outside of you? Sorry, but that is just a pet peeve of mine where a person tries to claim that another has a selfish reason when in fact, they have their own selfish reason. HE would like to finish inside of you.(His selfish reason) You don't like him to because you don't like the mess afterwards. (your selfish reason)
But as far as it being more intense... I will say it is.. It's a completely different feeling and interrupting the orgasm can be a little off-setting.. But then again, a lot of it is mental in a way as well,because after all our drive for sex is to procreate...and finishing inside is the way we procreate.. It is only natural for us to have the mental feeling that finishing inside feels better. and often times what our mental brain tells us feels better will physically will feel better.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (12 December 2008):
 You will get all kinds of answers. But, in general, I think most men would agree that having to withdraw and finish outside is NOT as good as finishing inside. Pay attention: I'm saying "having to withdraw". Because it is something the woman asks you to do, not something you would usually do.
When the stimulation is building up, you don't want to interrupt it for a while and change it for something different. I can speculate that a woman wouldn't find it nice to be at the very brink of orgasm when the stimulation ends and then resumes, in a different way. That is why he hates it.
Also, I can understand the leakage thing and why you don't like it, but for some men it could suggest that you hate his ejaculation, or you feel it is dirty. This is not a subject we men comment about, or at least no friend of mine has ever made any comments about it, but I don't think any man minds it if the woman uses a small towel.
You know, I have heard loud and angry comments about men finishing in the woman's belly. It wasn't even a conversation they were having with me; I overheard it in a fast-food place. "Overheard" is an understatement, for the woman was very vocal about it.
I think it is a bad idea to go with the majority. Go with what you two like. You're the ones who have sex together. The rest of us can watch TV if we want.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2008): Personally the most intense orgasms I have are when I pull out and she strokes it for me. That is so hot!
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A
male
reader, passionatelynumb +, writes (12 December 2008):
 Its unfortunate that you don't like the "leakage" aspect of sex.
As a guy, I love that sex is messy and so does my fiance. I love the sight of my semen spilling back out of her after sex. I love that my partner trusts me and loves me so much that she allows me to orgasm inside of her. It makes me feel so close to her.
As far as the orgasm goes. Its absolutely better. To me nothing feels more amazing. Remember, an orgasm has a lot to do with the mind as well. Consider this, a man can ejaculate without having an orgasm.
For me, orgasms from hand jobs and blow jobs pale in comparison from coming inside my partner.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (12 December 2008):
 Hello,
I'm a lady, so maybe my view is completely skewed by being on the other side of the orgasm. Firstly, it seems that an orgasm is an orgasm. BUT, finishing inside of your woman seems like a really satisfying ending for guys. Otherwise you're thrusting away, and then you have to interrupt your groove by pulling out. You have to leave the nice warmth of the va-jay jay, out into the cold open world to finish your business.
It seems that guys finish using their hands all the time during masturbation, so using something different, warm and amazing and then being able to thrust away until satisfaction and letting go inside of your woman, really experiencing her body, feeling more connected. He can bury himself inside of you to release. It does seem like it would be more intense.
I sympathize with the after sex cleanup. For me, it's best to have those towels next to the bed for a light cleanup, and I scamper off and pee right afterwords for a more thorough disposal.
Don't let him guilt you into doing anything you're not comfortable with. Pulling out won't kill him (also will not protect from pregnancy or disease) and will still be plenty enjoyable for him.
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A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (12 December 2008):
Whether the idea is all in the head, or in the genitals, I don't know - but I agree with him that there IS a difference!
I wouldn't say it's more intense inside my lover, but it's more satisfying. Actually, it's probably most intense when I pleasure myself.
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A
female
reader, MommyOfOne +, writes (12 December 2008):
 My boyfriend says its more intense... BUT, i do not have a penis, so I can only go on what I have been told.
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