A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello everyone Now I have a big insecurity issue to deal with and it usually end up with me feeling unwanted by my fiancé Long story shortWe got into a fight we broke up I tried getting back then found out that a guy that used to ONLY give her rides to my house got her drunk and had sex with her even when I warned her about how he was and I was right. Later we got into a fight and she ended up cheating on me with the same guy and at this time she had said she hated him and never wants to even see or speak to him. More recently they got together just for drinks to talk about her cousin who might be pregnant by this guy. My fiancé had sore and was often scared to ever see him but here is where my insecurity spikes up. She said sex with him was the best she ever had because his size... I'm about 5 to slightly over 6 inches and I know from what I have read that mine is completely normal. But it always ends up with her having an object and comparing t to me and this representation is huge and I feel like every time we talk about this it sounds like she wants him and it effects my sexual drive for her because I get the mindset that she wants him and not me in bed. Please can anyone help with this I have already tried talking to her but she tells me when I ask she answers the truth. I have no idea what to do to fix my insecurity I feel like I have to be better to her in bed but how can I with my size? She says that it is below average and very thin so please I want to be able to satisfy her but I feel that if I'm not able to she'll go with this guy. Anyone know how to deal with this?P.S. it took sometime for me to trust her again after she cheated on me before I took her back and I know she loves me but it hurts me thinking that she has no sexual desire for me I know trust is the most important part of a relationship and for us is no different but sex has a HUGE role in out relationship. Other than this everything is amazing
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be pregnant, broke up, cheated on me, cousin, drunk, might be pregnant Reply to this Question
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male
reader, jeffone  +, writes (20 March 2012):
my girlfriend tell me how her last guy was 10ins and how good he was when we are fighting that when i ask her of her past telling me that she never made a guy were a condom and how they came in her mouth it just makes her look bad
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2012): 5 to above 6 inches is above average? What does your gf want? 11 inches? Listen OP u are normal, hey even above normal SO get rid of the cheating woman, yep: kick her to the curb once and for all and don't even bother about her again.
This woman has rubbed salt into your pain by cheating AGAIN and then telling u how much better the other man is/was. Is this the behaviour of someone who loves you? Think again!
OP I detest doormats: insecure people thinking that they cannot get another person to love them therefore they stay with people who manipulate them, belittle them, scar them for life, emotionally abuse them and so forth: OP u owe it to yourself to love yourself and NEVER allow someone to treat you like u are second best.
So decide whether u want the Continuing Cheating woman OR you want self respect and a life with someone who will respect you, love u and remain faithful to you.
Hey if she is sooooo taken in with his member and his ability to satisfy her u will be indeed foolish to believe that she is staying away from this man: hell No, she is going back for seconds and thirds and and and.... She has already told u that u DO NOT and CANNOT Satisfy her so why the hell are u with her????Remember in her case once a cheater always a cheater! If sex is such a huge part of your lives do u honestly think she is not opening her legs to Mr Monster Member? How naïve can you be??
You are 18 -21 so I am assuming that now for the rest of your life u are going to be insecure and second best. Aaahhh the foolishness of youth and young life: get rid of the cheater and find a woman who is satisfied with almost 6 inches. That girl will be a very luck girl
LoveGirl
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A
male
reader, bronzed adonis  +, writes (19 March 2012):
 Dump her.Tell her you`v found someone else who`s a tighter fit.
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A
female
reader, curious1987 +, writes (19 March 2012):
 i'm sorry, but you could do 200 times better then this low life woman. for the record, size is not that big a deal too most women. if she loves you then size does not matter. please dump her,and find a woman that is going to treat you how you want to be treated. and that is fanaticism love you for you. you deserve better.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2012): She feels she can speak for an entire sex of people? All 3 billion or so of them?
No offense here, but she cheated. She doesn't even seem remorseful.
People like this, men or women, are not the type you should be associating with. The care nothing for anyone but themselves and they have a skewed vision as to what REAL pleasure is.
To them... sex is the greatest thing a human can experience and they get it in their head that everyone feels the same.
Sex is amazing, there is no denying... but size will never be the decider. You think I would turn a woman down if she has large breasts and I prefer smaller ones? No. Not in a million years.
Because it's the person those breasts belong to that is the deal breaker for the decent human being. It doesn't matter how attractive someone is or how they see themselves... if they are horrible people inside, everyone will eventually get sick of them at some point and move on.
As you should. No one deserves to be treated like they are second class.
Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, CANDY61 +, writes (19 March 2012):
It's not what you got.. It's how you use it..she will be in and out of relationships for the rest of her life looking for a big one, a real woman doesn't care about size because a real woman want a man that will love her for her and the same for a real man. If she think a relationship is all about sex then she has another thought coming, it take more than sex to build a good relationship and you are not the only man that size, your size maynot be the problem, she maybe oversize dealing with different guys. I would cut off all communication with this cruel person, I wouldn't go looking around on her facebook and would block her from mine and wouldn't answer her calls, I would move on. You are still young so you will find a nice girl that will love you for you, hold your head up high and keep on trucking baby.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (18 March 2012):
 You have no insecurity to fix. You are with a person you can trust. I think you know you have to leave, only it's painful for you to do so. But it would be your best idea.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (18 March 2012):
To be honest, she sounds like she's pretty vile to me. I have my pride, and there's no way that my pride would let me be with a woman like this.
You're worth more than this cheat. Go find a woman who can actually keep her pants up in front of other men for a start.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2012): This is me the one who wrote this
And she only cheated on me once and seen the other guy for drinks
But she would always tell me that ALL girls care about size that 100% of all the girls she knows care about size even if they are all in love with their boyfriend and size is pleasure and thinks that making love is doesn't make it any better
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2012): Leave her. I could write you a novel about the reasons but I'm feeling too lazy because the bottom line for this question is obvious. Leave her.
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A
male
reader, eek +, writes (18 March 2012):
 for yourself. For your happyness. Leave her and find someone who will love you and who you can trust. I know How you feel, i have been there, i know its hard when you love someone. But this wont go away. Leave her and find someone to make you happy.
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A
male
reader, zedd +, writes (18 March 2012):
If I were you, I would have said: "Was he? Then go f%ck him."
I mean if it's about sizes she encountered before you got together than it's one thing (and still understandable if someone feels insecure even about that, 'cause no considerate gf would rub such a thing into your face) but hey, she CHEATED on you!
That's what matters, not the size of your penis. She's cruel to you, that's it. Do you want to live your life with a cruel woman?
What would she do if you said to her: "Hey, the last time we had an argument I had sex with that girl from down the street and jesus, what fine tits she had! They were waaay better than yours, that's all I can say! But I still love you, I've only told that for the record."
What would she answer? Think about that. Or try it, see how she reacts.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 March 2012):
 She won't stop cheating since she knows you keep taking her back, dump her cheating ass and find someone who will love you like you love them.
She and that dude deserve each other, they are both "users".
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (18 March 2012):
 The only question you should ask her is to ask her to leave.
She cheated once. You decided to work on rebuilding the relationship together. That's okay.
Then she cheated again with the same guy. Really? Fool you once, shame on her. Fool you twice, shame on you. You gave her an opportunity to change and she squandered it.
She may say that his size is the reason that the sex was the best ever, but the truth is, and she either cannot or will not admit it is that the sex was better because it was illicit. If she were with him as a couple and not you, the thought of him sleeping around and getting other women pregnsnt would remove that "best ever" feeling right quick.
You have nothing to be insecure about. Your fiance is a dog who is taking you for a ride. She doesn't respect you, and you need to drop her. The "everything else" is amazing just means that you like the sex.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2012): First off she cheated on you not once but twice, first time is a mistake (maybe), second time is not. Second of all she's throwing this betrayal in your face because she knows it's a way to hurt you or get at you and it's clearly working.
You say you know she loves you, how does she show this? By cheating on you and then saying clearly cruel stuff to spike your insecurity. now every time you sleep together not only do you have the betrayal but now you think you don't measure up to this guy so immediately you're not expressing love towards her in a physical way now you're just trying to perform some some macho porn god and she probably knows this too.
First off if you two truely love each other and want this to work then she stops seeing this guy, period! How can you trust her when she keeps seeing the guy she cheated on you with.
Personally I'd dump her, this guy is just using her for sex, you are the one she connects with emotionally but personally I think it sucks she would be so cruel to say stuff like he was the best ever, if that is the case then she should go to him because buddy sex alone isn't a relationship, it takes much much more. I think she is using you because she knows she has no future with this guy and you will always take her back. Love is about trust and honouring the person you claim to love with truth and honesty, she crossed the line twice then had the gall to throw it in your face. you're young and you'll find someone else if you choose to go it alone but if you want this to work then talk to her about it, tell her see stops seeing this guy and if she loves you to prove it to you by never seeing this guy again, that's the minimum, the rest is up to you and time.
Good luck
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