A
female
age
36-40,
*weetheart1nonly
writes: My boyfriend just broke up with me. Before this, he promised to help me with part of my rent while i add the rest because of situation. Now we are broken up, I don't know if it's wise to still collect part of the money from him or don't. Would that let me lose my pride. Need advice!
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male
reader, AvgGuy1 +, writes (10 September 2010):
If you don't feel right about accepting the money... outright... then workout a LOAN. Draw up papers stating how long he will help you and then how long it will take you to pay him back and any interest. Obviously you'll need to figure out HOW long you will need his assistance in order to do this... but you should be able to do that.
A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (1 September 2010):
Well if it were me in this situation I would not take the money. You have broken up, you are not his responsibility and he should not have to bail you out if you cannot get your rent together. It is not his problem any more that you cant afford your rent.
Plus it would mean you then owe your ex money which is never ideal as it will drag the break-up on for longer as you will have to be in touch with him letting him know when he will get the money back etc.
So dont take the money, he has been kind to offer it to you but it is the wrong thing to do. Ask a family member or friend to help you out with your rent instead.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, sweetheart1nonly +, writes (1 September 2010):
sweetheart1nonly is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your advice. I would take it. I'm so hurt.
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A
female
reader, sweetheart1nonly +, writes (1 September 2010):
sweetheart1nonly is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes he offered to help me himself but I don't really know because I need the money, if i should still take it or not after the break up.
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A
female
reader, Inallhonesty... +, writes (1 September 2010):
Well is he still offering? If he is and you're too "proud" to take it, then know that your pride could risk you getting put out of your home. Unless there's someone else besides him that you could ask, I'd accept it and offer to pay him back granted you two will still communicate after this.
If he's not offering, try asking someone else and let him be your last resort. Let him know that you wouldn't take it considering the two of you aren't together anymore, but you had already expected it from him. Plus, if it'll make you feel better, you can pay him back then too.
And as someone else said, independence is freedom. I hate depending on others. I know you're in a situation and I'm sure you didn't expect the breakup, but you have to financially prepare yourself for setbacks like this in the future. I wish you luck :)
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