A
female
age
30-35,
*inful_thinker89
writes:My daughter is about to be a year old next week and does not walk nor try to. She just crawls and she goes to the furniture and stands up on it. She was born 2 months premature and her doctor always said that some things she might do a little bit later, which with all of her milestones she did but never the less I was always so proud and excited for her. My problem is that everyone says things to her like stop being lazy or she needs to hurry up and walk. I get really upset by this because every baby does things in thier own time and I'm really not rushing her, I hold her hands and walk along with her but im not going to keep pushing her if she doesnt want to walk just yet. Even my fiancees cousins girlfriend, said bring her over here and i will make her walk, that made me highly upset and I kind of went off. I understand that by now some babies walk and some wait til after their first birthday but either way im content and unless it was a concern for her dr, then I'm ok with her taking her time. This is all coming from her dads side of the family. Also me being the stay at home mom, im told I baby her too much and dont allow her to do too much on her own. I get tired of people questioning my parenting skills or how I'm raising her. I feel like I have every right to be upset by everyone. I really dont mind people giving me friendly advice or trying to help out when I ask for it or if it looks like I need some help but I dont need everyone telling me what she should or what i should be doing.
View related questions:
cousin, fiance Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (25 July 2012):
 C. Grant is right.
If the Ped. is not worried, no need to fret.
EACH child is an individual and will hit their miles stones when they are GOOD and READY.
I have 3 children they all started standing walking at different ages. They hit the various miles stones at different ages. I wasn't worried at all. Then again I had no negative people around me.
I suggest you pull whomever is talking smack and set them straight. And tell them to butt out.
A
male
reader, JustHelpinAgain  +, writes (25 July 2012):
OP I think you need to stop comments like this. Most of these where not said to critisize you but nevertheless are really insensitive and hurtful. You need to say something, either just a bit of sarcasm or straight out tell them how they hurt you and how much you have been through with this baby. Start crying and make them apologise. That way they will learn to think before blurting out such dumbness.
...............................
A
female
reader, Sinful_thinker89 +, writes (25 July 2012):
Sinful_thinker89 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you everyone for your advice, most times I do just walk away without saying anything. It feels good to vent and know that there are others in the world who's kids didn't walk just yet. I'm still very proud of her regardless if she walked today or a month from now im not too worried
...............................
A
female
reader, agonyauntsanonymous +, writes (25 July 2012):
How rude! My first didnt walk till 13 months. Once he figured out walking was faster within two days he was running. My second didnt walk till he was 14 months he has hip displaysia and has worn a harness 24/7 until he was 8 months. Hes 14 months now and wears it at nights, the dr said he wouldnt walk till 2. All kids are different. I would talk to your husband about it. Maybe he can speak with his family. I would not let them treat you that way. Its good you stood up for yourself and your daughter. I would probably have some colorful language for them too. That is so rude.
...............................
A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (25 July 2012):
I hate when people suddenly become 'experts'. Tell them that your child is being monitored and that if something was wrong, you're sure a QUALIFIED medical health care professional would inform you. As of now, nothing is wrong. I walked at 20 months and I turned out fine, typical milestones be damned. It's just a guideline, so keep telling them that until they leave you alone.
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (25 July 2012):
 IF she was 2 months premature she is developmentally considered ten months old.
My one son walked at nine months... the other one at 13 months.
these people who are giving you a hard time have no clue about babies... when they say a baby will walk at a year it's an AVERAGE... that means 50% before and 50% after...
The doctor is not concerned... her MOTHER is not concerned therefore these other people need to MYOB....
smile at them and say "thank you for your concern" and change the subject... if they harp on it you can say that you have discussed it with her doctor and he's monitoring it.
...............................
A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (25 July 2012):
I was not premature and my Mom says I walked after 16 months, and that was with a LOT of ''encouragement''. (still hate walking haha) you have the right attitude and I think that is a great thing as people especially younger mums seem to be more impatient with their kids. the fact that your daughter is crawling already means she will walk soon enough by herself, so I would say shes hitting this milestone bang on time. ignore them or better still tell them they can give advice if you ask for it and not before, that she is doing fine. anyway, forcing a baby to walk can give them bowed legs so take no notice of them. good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (25 July 2012):
 No offense, but it sounds like you are surrounded by ignorant and inconsiderate people. Anyone who knows anything about babies knows they do things in their own time (just like you said). Of course we can help them, but we can't MAKE babies do things. Perhaps try to limit your time with some of these people if you can. I would.
...............................
A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (24 July 2012):
Raising children, and the things they ought to have accomplished by whatever age, are subjects that it seems everyone has an opinion on. Listen to the real experts: your doctor, health visitor, or whoever it is that sees your daughter’s progress and knows what should and should not be happening at any given age. When these family members make their comments, simply tell them that the expert opinion is that there is no concern and so you’re quite happy with the situation. If it upsets you too much, walk away. But if you can learn to shrug it off, even though it must be very frustrating, try to do so. If they can see that it’s not getting to you, they’ll stop.
I wish you all the very best.
...............................
A
male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (24 July 2012):
 If your child's doctor isn't concerned then no one else should be. Tune out the busybodies -- especially the ones who don't have kids.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2012): You need to simply tell everyone that this is YOUR CHILD and YOUR going to raise her how you want . You can tell them , "when I want advice , ill ask for it " lol in a nicer way I suppose .My advice as far as walking is too keep doing what your doing . Walking with her & all . Also those push toys are helpful. It is very normal behavior your child is expressing. Not every child walks before 1 !! I work with infants & toddlers . I see it first hand !
...............................
|
