A
male
age
36-40,
*eraciousone
writes:hi cupid, am a young guy of 22. i have a serious issue that disturbed my life sometimes and trying to stop this but it's just like pouring water on the stone. I have sexual feelings whenever I see a woman naked or watch a porn movie not only that, whenever I wake up in the morning I get an erection in a sense that I will look for a person to have sex with. I am trying to stop watching porn and also trying not to look at naked women again. My question now is, is this normal to have an erection when you wake up in the morning or any time or did I have a spiritual problem. Please, I need advice on how to tackle this problem.
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male
reader, bharat mehta  +, writes (5 December 2009):
 Your is not problem at all, which required answer. but so far knowledge is concern, which you lack, so you need knowledge only. What you call erection, is not problem but it is a gift of nature, which is required to be value with highest wisdom possible. I can advise you to stop watching porn site, but follow my tips.1. Just begin to observe and enjoy your own erection. To enjoy one's own erection is real cultivation of mind, and it is real knowledge. Pornographer lack this knowledge and will not teach such thing.2. Do not go for ejaculation, but hold your erection for longest time possible...slowly slowly your mind will be able to taste the pleasure. This will help you to learn so many thing...one, meditation, concentration, cheerfulness, etc. To deal with pleasure with calm cold and calculated mind is difficult,but it will become easy with study. Such learning will teach how to share pleasure with partner, and will make your life a true heaven in this life, and on this earth.
A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (3 December 2009):
 Why do I get a strong feeling that if you stop looking at pornography it won't help you stop them morning errections and it will make you more than less likely to want a woman in your life to have sex with. Might be a good thing really, you'll be more intrested in the girls arround you than pictures in a magazine/video. Men at your age like to think about sex, have sex, and watch sex as often as they can. It's your hormones that is in the driving seat, with or without pornography.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2009): Wow, that female anon does not sound female at all LOL. Having wood in the morning is absolutely normal. Looking at porn once in a while is as well, but too much of it can be a bad thing. If you are the type of person that will get addicted to porn, it will wreck your life. Many people on this site are pro-porn so you won't get much advise to abstain from it, but I can tell you from having worked with people who's sexuality was highjacked by it, it can be a very dangerous thing. Try going without the porn for a month to see if that bothers you at all, if it does, you might be well on your way to it becoming an addiction.Men that become addicted eventually loose the ability to be aroused without it, the type of porn they like to view 'escalates' into the bazaar, they become isolated from the real world and have a hard time holding a job, many even get fired from their jobs for looking at porn on work time and often times they injure themselves or their penises, some even develop erectile dysfunction :(. Find a hobby to occupy your spare time and if you need to masturbate, do so without the internet, you will find that you won't masturbate nearly as often and you will be following your body's natural rythm rather than forcing it to comply to your porn habit.
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A
female
reader, asian tealeaf  +, writes (20 November 2009):
 most men wake up with erections, this is perfectly normal. a lot of praise is due towards any man who understands he has a sexual addiction to porn, or sees porn as not the right outlet for himself. as it is porn is a real huge problem with our men in our societies. it is a degradation to women, and even for the ones who permit themselves to be treated as objects rather then actual persons. dear sir, u are on the right path. my honey had a HUGE prob with porn. he was soo addicted to it, even after having mindblowing sex with me. soon after i put it forth to him he had an addiction, and it hurt me and affected my sex drive. our sex life was severely affected soon after i realized he had a porn habit. well, its been 2-half yrs and hes porn free. to say the least we make our own porn and this satisfies his urges. and hes happy im happy so we are happy. noting u are not in a relationship and this is not one of ur issues. but my honey gave all his porn, every last bit of it to his buddies. he erased all his porn offf the pc and yes, i am rather pc cavvy so i check once in a while and hes not been on it at all. anyways, keep going strong. and know ur gonna be ok. there are many other ways to choke ur chicken. porn is not the way. its harmful in so many ways. believe me, and other guys and gals who have to battle their partners porn habits.
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A
female
reader, empop  +, writes (20 November 2009):
Wait - you're worried that you get erections and are attracted to women? Most men tend to get more concerned when these things aren't true.
The only thing I'd suggest, is varying your porn up so you don't get used to one type of woman or one type of sex. It would suck for you to get used to busty blondes giving blowjobs, and end up falling in love with a small submissive red head. Check out amateur porn for more natural looking woman, and try to develop an appreciation for all looks, body types, and different types of sex.
You'll probably find yourself developing certain preferences, but try to stay open minded about new things because you'll never know what real life will eventually bring.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2009): Cheer up! Nothing wrong with a sausage shuffle now and then. Besides, porn sure "beats" the hell out of the real thing - and just think of the money you are saving that you'd have to throw away on some ungrateful princess who would undoubtedly made you wait indefinitely until she got around to helping you to fully release. I needn't remind you that that delicious dinner you paid for her *is no* guarrantee that later that evening you will be able to "log on" to HER server and in a few short seconds be able to download PURE ecstasy, no questions, no hassles and no costs.Porn and self pleasure are both acceptable and safe ways for unattractive and socially inept young men with absurdly high expectations to achieve their dreams while providing much needed exercise to their flabby physique. For the otherwise attractive man who is far too prudent to unnecessarily expose himself to mistreatment at the hands of the millions of bothersome or untrustworthy women swarming around him, it permits a fair and unencumbered "sampling of the wears" without fear of those nasty obligations or (God forbid) incessant babbling and game playing that inevitably are part and parcel of a face to face interaction.Please keep up the good work.
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A
male
reader, Jim01 +, writes (20 November 2009):
I agree with msfrankie when she says that resisting something and putting some control in your life is a good thing. But with that in mind I would not try to stop watching completely, try to wean yourself off of it. If you stop and go cold turkey you'll drive yourself nuts. Sometimes you have to un-clog the drain, choke the nun, put the kids out for recess...if you know what i mean.Best of luck Jim
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A
female
reader, MsFrankie +, writes (20 November 2009):
 This is completely normal - don't worry about it. Sometimes the guilt that surrounds our sexual feelings makes it worse and drives us to do these things more - out of self hatred or punishment or something. Nearly all of us watch porn - I actually think most people with the internet - men and women - watch porn about once a day at least - especially if we haven't got a partner that we're having sex with at the moment. It's fun and natural to watch other people having sex. Give yourself a break about it - but remember - sometimes it will make you feel better to do something different - or to resist - just to show yourself that you are in control and that your addiction is not controlling you.
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A
female
reader, theoneyoucancounton... +, writes (20 November 2009):
 You have nothing to worry about, it is perfectly normal for a guy to have an erection in the morning....in fact it is healthy if you do.
As for lookingat naked women and porn thats normal to a certain extent. If you want to stop,, get rid of the videos and the photos and find youself a loving girlfriend that makes it ok for you to be turned on when shes naked. Treat her right. Get your head straight and be the guy you want to be. There is more to life than porn.
Good luck, i know you can do it.
Phoebe
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