A
male
age
36-40,
*ommetuveux
writes:Hello all,I have always struggled with intimate things as I would be worried about if my partner had been with very well endowed men. I know that statistically most guys will have to deal with that. But how do they? It always seems like the (not so much of an) elephant in the room. Do girls miss it and just settle if they have been with a huge guy before? It is not like if they were with someone rich before because you can get richer etc. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, sleepwalker  +, writes (21 April 2017):
Skilled lovers come in all penis sizes. Sure there are some women who find an above average penis more satisfying. So why not turn your insecurity into actions by educating yourself on how to become a skilled lover for your GF? If she's a keeper, she will love you all the more for it; if she is not, then consider bowing out gracefully out of the relationship and finding yourself a woman who will very happy to have found a good man and a skilled lover. Plenty of fish out there and not all of them are size queens.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (18 April 2017):
 My guess is your wife was just curious, she was probably reading some article about the average size and thought she would see where you where on that. Doubt she meant any harm.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2017): I am not the OP but want to thank the previous two posters-- very nice of you to share positive experiences with guys with smaller penises!
I used to not care about the size of mine, but then my wife asked to measure it one day for some reason. :(
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2017): I had a similar experience to intrigued3000. I had a boyfriend who was huge. The sex was painful and I could not relax enough to enjoy it. I then dated someone who was rather small and really not very imaginative, but always hit my G spot and I could always have an orgasm.
If you are imaginative and aware of what turns her on then you should have no problems satifying her.
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A
female
reader, Intrigued3000  +, writes (15 April 2017):
 My ex husband was well endowed and I did not enjoy sex with him. It was very painful and I could not wait for it to be over. It was awful. I've also been with a guy who was less than average size but my God the sex was amazing because he somehow hit the G spot almost every time. He was just an overall better lover. Size does not matter one bit. It is how much effort a man puts into pleasing a woman in bed that matters.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (15 April 2017):
 Sigh. This comes down to the general misconception that bigger is better. Its not. If a girl has been with a well endowed man before, chances are she will be thrilled to be with someone average again.
Putting something large into a small opening is not pleasurable. Its painful! Try to grasp this.
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (15 April 2017):
Men who fixate on the size of it forget one thing: a woman is a rational, thinking being with freedom to make choices of her own. If it was a problem, she could go out and find some-one with a bigger penis any time. If she chooses to remain with her partner, why isn’t that enough? Listen to the men who’ve answered this and told you that it’s not been an issue for them, or the women who’ve told you that women really do usually care a lot less than men who are insecure about their size think that they will.
Pleasing a woman isn’t dependent on the number of inches at your disposal. It’s about being attentive to her, understanding what her needs are and how you can satisfy her. That’s half about technique, and half about having the open communication to learn from each other about what works for you in the bedroom. You’re right, you can get richer. You can also get better as a lover, partly by allowing your partner to show you what works for them and partly by relaxing and being prepared to try different things. A man with a large penis who pays no concern to his partner’s needs will still be a lousy lover.
One final thought I would leave you with is this: insecurity and self-pity are far bigger turn-offs than penis size. There is so much more to a relationship than sex, and so much more to sex than size.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
male
reader, Phil052 +, writes (15 April 2017):
 Well, my wife had 7 or 8 lovers before me, so statistically it is likely that she has had lovers with a larger erect penis than me. It doesn't appear to be a problem given we've been together for 20 years! This is only an issue if you make it one!
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (15 April 2017):
 It always amazes me how many men fixate on this one small (no pun intended) part of their body, instead of things that matter like kindness, personality, generosity, humour, etc.
Yes, I am sure there are a few women out there who actually WANT a guy with a big dick, just as there are men out there who WANT a women with blonde hair or big boobs. That does not meadoctor), n others are the same, nor even that that is their ONLY criteria. It might be for a one night stand, or a fling, but certainly not that important in a long term relationship. Most of a woman's nerve endings are in the first couple of inches of their vagina, so large is totally unnecessary - and, in fact, even uncomfortable after a certain size.
YOU are not your dick. Your dick is just a part of you. If it is tiny - like a couple of inches erect (in which case you need to see your doctor) - you have more important things to worry about, like being a nice person, treating your girlfriend well and learning how to please your current girlfriend in bed. Remember, all women are different. ASK them what they like and how they like to be touched. THAT will stand you in much better stead than a big dick, I promise.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2017): You cant cope. It will always nibble at your mind. You shouldnt have asked her and she shouldnt have told you. Now you just have to accept the fact or leave her.
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A
female
reader, mad stacey +, writes (15 April 2017):
Dont worry about it most woman dont care about size as sex is only one part of a relationship...alot of woman sort of think the same about there boobs ...was his exs boobs bigger????... Did he enjoy them more ?? .. She is with you for you not because the size of your dick or wallet.
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A
male
reader, sleepwalker +, writes (15 April 2017):
Look even so called well endowed men get cheated on and/or left for another man (or a woman) with an average or below average size penis. That is a fact of life.
Instead of worrying about whether your penis will measure up to a woman's standards, why not attempt to make her feel safe in that she can trust you and open up to you as to what she likes as far as sex and strive to become the best lover she has ever had, in and out of bed. Remember, she also has her insecurities about her body and if you can show her that there is no other woman for you in this world, she may enjoy the best sex she ever had.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2017): I just don't understand the way men think. I'm constantly shocked and saddened when I read on here about men and their worries about how much we care about the size of their dicks. Good God. It's the MAN we fall in love with!! Not the size of his dick! What do you think women are like for God's sake? Have you ever been in love? Would you fall in love and not be happy because your new girlfriend's breasts weren't as big as your present lady's? I don't care about the size of a dick. I don't care about the size of a bank balance. I have never dated nor married a man for his penis and I have never dated or married a man for the size of his bank account.What is important to us women is how you treat us, do you respect us, do you do what you say you're going to do, are you reliable, someone we can talk to and someone who is actually a really close, good friend. Can we laugh with you, can we trust you. Do you want to please us in bed with plenty of foreplay and taking your time? Can you use your tongue and your fingers to bring us to orgasm because that is the best way to make us cum. We are not as shallow as you seem to think. Maybe get to know women as people and then you'll realise that these worries of yours are actually insulting to us as people. We are not like men. We do not worship penises. In fact the man I was with who was really big in that department put me off a bit. It was difficult to get it in, a bit painful and if I gave him oral, I practically got lockjaw. Please understand that life and love is not about the size of a penis. The man I'm crazy about now has problems with getting an erection. I could NOT care less. I love him and as long as he's with me I'm happy. He doesn't let it bother him either and it's his confidence that I love. Please get some perspective.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 April 2017):
 If she WANTED the bigger dick she would have SETTLED for the guy attached to that BIGGER dick.
For some women, no doubt the size matters. For others, it REALLY doesn't. What DOES matter is that regardless of size the GUY at the END of the dick knows HOW to please her sexually and otherwise, makes her happy, treats her right, is a good partner, etc. etc.
My only experience with a well-endowed guy wasn't something I look back on and miss. Neither him NOR his dick. He was a crappy BF and a lousy lover. So yeah, size wouldn't impress me, nor would it be a criteria when "selecting" a mate/partner.
My advice, don't ASK her about this because YOU really DON'T want to know.
She isn't with you because of your dick. She (I presume) loves ALL of you.
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