A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Many women are believers or Christians etc. I'm not saying you can't date at all, that's absurd, all I'm trying to convey is that your dating pool is rather limited. Like at my college, most women seem to be believers. I know this because in my lecture hall my professor asked us how many of believed in God and the overwhelming majority raised their hand. Including some very attractive women. So, if you are an atheist guy, do you keep your beliefs to yourself when trying to date women? Or is your dating pool limited?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 December 2013):
 Believing in God or a higher power is different than believing in organized religion. Many folks believe in God or a higher power but not in religion. Therefore many folks who believe in god are not limited to dating folks of the same belief.
Yes devoutly religious men or women will not and should not date non-religious people. It just sets up folks for heartache in the end. BUT, your dating pool is so not limited. In fact, it’s bigger than those who want a partner who has the same belief system they do.
You can date women that believe in God but not religion. You can date agnostics. You can date atheists. You can date NON-practicing folks (like me who believe in God and a particular religion but do not observe the laws of our faith).
If you only will date other atheists then yes your dating pool is tiny. but if you are willing to date agnostics or non-practicing folks who believe in a higher power or God then you have a huge and wide range of folks to chose from.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2013): Almost all organized religions believe in God, except maybe Buddhists (some Buddhist friends explained that they don't have a God figure). Belief in God, and being a Christian, are not one and the same!
If it helps, my parents came from two VERY different religious backgrounds; you wouldn't believe me if I told you! hahaha
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2013): If you're an atheist that prefers to only date atheists, then your dating pool is limited. I used to be one of those people until I realized that dating doesn't have to be so black & white. There are many levels of religion and believing. Not all believers go to church, either. It really depends on how important religion is to them, and how important atheism is to you.
My best friend and I are atheists. Her boyfriend is Christian and goes to church on Sundays to socialize. Other than that there's really no obvious trait. I'm personally more "strict." I would prefer my partner not to go to church on Sundays. I find the content focused on at church meaningless and would prefer to spend time together with my partner and future family.
Again, the level of belief/religion is very important. What would you teach your kids? Would your partner's parents be OK with your beliefs, and vice versa? There is an ocean of difference between someone who thinks science is bogus, VS someone who goes to church to see friends.
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A
male
reader, M Proops  +, writes (1 December 2013):
I'm an agnostic (don't believe in any god or life after death) but my wife is a committed Christian and regularly goes to church alone. Doesn't bother me at all.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (1 December 2013):
 I agree with the other aunts, but there are also a question about how you express your beliefs as well, because atheism isn't a lack of belief, it's a belief that there is no god.
While it's true that Christianity and a belief in God follows a spectrum of expression, and yes, belief isn't necessarily devotion, discipleship, or piety of religion, the same holds true for atheism.
My brother is an atheist who also married one. He would not be able to marry a believer, even a casual non-practicing one, because he holds utter contempt for religion and for those who practice it. His Facebook is filled with religious mocking and atheistic slogans. I've often remarked to him that he's a more devoted atheist than many Christians are to their beliefs. So it depends on your view of those who believe in God.
I agree - never lie about your beliefs. But ask yourself, would you respect those with a belief in God, or even someone who holds an agnostic view of religion? If it's just not that important to you, you'll find your choices wider. If you're like my brother and are more fanatical about atheism, then you might really want to restrict your choice to someone who more closely shares your views.
Christians have the same mandate. The casual ones whose beliefs are more inherited may find more choices than an "on-fire" devout one, who prefers to date those whose religion is their life. That's the same with all religions, I would guess. You also have their family to consider as well. I've seen religion not matter so much to a couple, only to find that parents and relatives have much more of a problem.
Being an atheist may in fact limit some of your choices, however the choices you make might be much better, because you'll find someone that much more compatible. There are very hot women who are atheists, I guarantee it.
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A
female
reader, KC12 +, writes (1 December 2013):
 Ooh, I meant keeping your mind open to the possibility of meeting a religious girl who is also open-minded, that you can get along well with. ;)
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A
female
reader, KC12 +, writes (1 December 2013):
I think it's quite possible for you to have a normal, healthy relationship with a person of any faith--as long as you have respect for each other. I am a christian, and my boyfriend is not religious at all. We have a very healthy relationship in that regard--what few complications we have had these past few years have nothing to do with that. The key is: He has never been disrespectful of my beliefs, and I respect his right to believe (or not believe) whatever he wants.More to the point, I don't preach to him about what I believe (because I'm not that kind of person) and he doesn't berate what I believe, or make fun of it.I think it all depends on the TYPE of believer a girl is, and the type of person you are. I'm very much a "to each his own" type of person, and so is my BF. I know a lot of atheists and agnostics who are uncomfortable around some religious people--that is, the type of zealotish (for lack of a better word) people where every other word out of their mouth is about God. I also know of a few people (male and female alike) who would not date outside of their faith (prodestant, jewish, and catholic respectively). But in today's day and age I think those people are few and far between. That line of thinking is getting pretty "old school" in my opinion. I'm basing that on people I know of course, nothing "statistical" so take that for what it's worth.If you keep your mind open to the possibility, and you find an open-minded girl I believe you'll find that the dating pool isn't as limited as you think.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 December 2013):
 I guess it depends from where you live...
I , for instance, don't share your perceptions that many women are believers or Christians. Nominally, perhaps. Most people I know were regularly christened and everything, but , in practice, are uninterested or agnostic, and , anyway, tolerant about different religious views. And I live in Italy, where the near totality og the population of the population is Catholic !.
One thing , however, is believing in God ( which, anyway, not all women do ) and all another one being militant, i.e.actually practicing a faith , and / or only wanting to choose a partner among those who practice your same faith , and at your same level of involvement.
You may find SOME women that may not want to have anything to do with you because of your atheism,- but I'd say that would not shrink majorly your dating pool. Most people, thanks God :)- or thanks to sheer luck, for the atheists- are intelligent and enlightened enough to let you deal on your own with your relationship with God, or lack of the same.
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female
reader, person12345 +, writes (1 December 2013):
 They are? That wasn't true where I went to school or among my current group of friends. My bf is atheist, I am atheist, and it has never been a challenge in dating for either of us.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (1 December 2013):
 Believing in God is not the same thing as being Christian. I know I shouldn't read into every word but what your wrote sounds like only plain looking girls are into church and stuff, and the glamorous care more about material things on earth. I don't think you have any problems. I think God, for most people, means a higher being than you, a mysterious powerful force, something that gives you faith when you are down. Not the judgmental God that sends people to hell or watches you when you masturbate. If you ask those women, every single one, to pass out little "Jesus loves you" pamphlets on the streets, they won't do it. Raising a hand is easy though.
I wonder what class you were taking and what kind of professor asks such an open ended question. How do you define God?
When you date, you say nothing. When you come across Christian girls, then ask them if it's a problem that you don't go to church. If I see a guy who openly identifies himself as an atheist as if it's a big deal, I would find it very weird indeed.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (1 December 2013):
 One thing is being a believer, another is actually worshiping and living according to the Bible. I have met many women who call themselves Christians but they are only "really" Christians once a week on Sundays.
I think your dating pool might be a little more limited if you ONLY want to date Atheist women. If you can date someone who has a different belief set when it comes to religion then you, you might not be so limited.
I think hiding the fact that you are an Atheist when you are dating is wrong. I think it should be out in the open, because to SOME this is a VITAL part of their lives, for others it's not. So in order to find someone who can respect your views and whom YOU in return can respect you have to be open about it. Doesn't mean you have to discuss and debate it constantly.
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A
female
reader, shna  +, writes (1 December 2013):
 I don't think your dating pool would be limited ! People from all walks of life with different cultures and religious backgrounds find love with others who believe different thing! I'm a raised catholic but its not something i believe in or stand by in my life and it wouldn't matter to be who my lover was or what he believed in!! But to be honest i wouldn't be comfortable dating sombody who is highly religious ! Religion is not a number 1 priority to everyone. Therefore its not going to be a deal breaker in a lot of relationships!
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