A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend is extremely attractive, like the hottest boy I have ever laid eyes on in my life. He's got the tightest body made of solid muscle and the cutest face and he is sooooooooo much the best sex I have ever had a million times over. The only problem is that he knows how gorgeous he is, and I think he sees it as like a justification to cheat on me. We've been together for 2 1/2 years and he has cheated on me with at least 8 different girls that I know of. The last time was about 2 months ago and we were watching a movie and he thought the girl in it was hot and not that long after I found out that he had gotten in contact with her and ended up screwing her! We live in LA and he is really rich and is in the entertainment industry and has a lot of famous friends so its not hard for him to meet the people that he wants, actually most of the girls I know of are actresses that he saw on tv or in a movie. Thats like "his thing" I guess. And she was 29 and he's only 19 and that bugs me even more for some reason! I don't know why he keeps doing this and I really think he just does it to prove to himself that every girl he wants will do him, if that makes sense. He really is the hottest boy in existance, just so gorgeous, and I feel so lucky just like being seen with him and living with him because of how attractive he is. But I am sick of him cheating on me! I don't know how to make him stop though. I broke up with him a while ago and I started dating someone else and all that did was drive me right back to him because I missed him so bad. And I don't only like him just cause he's so hot, he is really really sweet and the nicest person to me (aside from the cheating) and he's always so happy and positive and I feel so loved when I'm with him. Everything else is good except for when he sees a girl who he thinks is pretty he wants to do her, so he does, and I don't know if this will ever stop. I don't think he goes out and tries to find girls to cheat on me with, I think its only when he sees someone without trying that it gets in his head, and since he looks like he does he always gets them. I don't think he wants to cheat, I think its like impulse for him.I can't bring myself to break up with him because he is like perfect in every way (except the cheating) and I know that there is no way I could ever find someone as good as him, and then I think I would feel let down with like every guy I would try and date. Cause they wouldn't be an nice to me or wouldn't be as hot or the sex wouldn't be as good or anything. I need to know if anyone has ever dated a person who is just like THE hottest human ever...but they knew it so they kind of acted like they were entitled to cheating? He knows how hot he is, like every single time he sees his reflection he stops and looks and like smiles at himself, I used to think that was cute but now its kind of stupid cause its EVERY time he catches a glimpse of himself. He's only 19 so does that mean he will outgrow it? Or is he going to be like this forever? Has anyone dated someone like this who just knows how freaking hot they are and so they use their attractiveness to get all the girls that they want? Even though they were already in a long term relaionship! Is he going to outgrow this since he's young or is there like a way to make him stop doing this? I'm getting really sick of it because I have never cheated on him and if I did he would be pissed. The main question is will he outgrow this since he's young? Is it an age thing or this like a narcissitic thing that wont go away?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Lee Adama  +, writes (17 December 2009):
 In all honesty, why would he bother? You've already stated that... "I can't bring myself to break up with him because he is like perfect in every way". So basically, he has a green light to shag around to his hearts content, with the knowledge that you'll be there waiting for him. Don’t worry though, sooner or later you'll get sick of it. Perhaps when he gets another girl pregnant, or passes an STD onto you, or you never know he might even start knocking you about abit, after all, he's clearly got no respect for you.
A
male
reader, Fazio +, writes (5 December 2009):
Chris Rock says that a man is as faithful as his options. It sounds like your guy has a lot of options.
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A
female
reader, Miss Regard +, writes (3 December 2009):
Listen honey!!! Very Simple
My situation my "guy"..32 year old guy drop dead georgous,successful and charming. He and EVERYONE ELSE including my family and friends know it! I have been with him for 5 almost 6 years and he has not changed a bit PLAYER,PLAYER,PLAYER!
He will NEVER change. Save yourself, your self esteem and you self respect while you can. Or else you will be like me...6 years later on a blog asking people for advice. Not because Im not attractive or successful myself but because 6 years ago I was willing to accept a little bit of something for a whole lot of nothing!
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A
male
reader, Illithid +, writes (3 December 2009):
 You said he's "cheated on me with at least 8 different girls that I know of" but what caught my eye is "that I KNOW OF". He's cheated at LEAST eight times in over two years. If someone is a cheater, they're a cheater. It's who that person is. It's POSSIBLE for a cheater to control that impulse in the future, but they will always BE someone that looks at others and weighs options. This man LOVES to cheat, constantly. No. He will never be faithful to you.
And you claim you love him for more than his body, but you mentioned the word "hot" eight times up there, besides how much you talked about how sexy he is, how good the sex is, how attractive he is, how much you like his muscles, etc. Girl, honestly, you sound like you DO love him for the sex. However much else you like him, the sex and his body are the only two things you're able to talk about when talking about him.
So you have two choices: Leave him and find someone that's less physically attractive but will love you, or stay with him knowing that you're only in it for the sex and that he's never going to stop cheating.
You do NOT have a boyfriend. You have a share of his penis. You are NOT in a loving relationship. You are a Friends With Benefits roommate. He does NOT love you. He loves sex and himself and nothing else.
You can stay with him if you like, but do so knowing that you're nothing but sex. You're not even a person to him. You're just convenient sex and an ego boost. If you can live with that, it's your call, but I know I couldn't.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2009): I am sorry that you were ridiculed on this site, i know that's not why you came here.
You both are very young. Boys and girls now days tend to sleep around a lot at your age. Especially like u said your guy is handsome and has access to rich and famous.
It seems to me like u guys had some kind of agreement for open relationship. How alse would u know all the details.
You obviously don't like it, understandably, but, please, have no hope that he will change. Some men don't change until they can get it up.
Also, reconsider about you not meeting anyone as nice as your guy. Life is long, there are a lot of fish in the sea.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 December 2009):
 Amen Satindesire.
I 100% agree with her post. Any woman letting a man walk all over her like you do might as well get DOORMAT stamped on your forehead..
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 December 2009):
The ladies below are right. But in case you want a male's perspective, here it is.
He will never change.
So get rid of him, or pay the price and be hurt and used for the rest of your life.
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A
male
reader, adamskidude +, writes (3 December 2009):
 I didnt bother to read the post, the title says it all.
The answer is no.
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A
female
reader, Jayney Y  +, writes (2 December 2009):
 Is your self esteem so far in the gutter that you think you can't find anyone better than this bottomless pit of vanity that you call boyfriend? You must be absolutely desperate if you think he's a good catch. Your post makes me want to shake you really hard. For Gods sake get some self-respect before you catch the clap off him.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (2 December 2009):
I'm sorry, but I when I saw the title of this I laughed and had to read it. I can't believe you are hoping someone who is a serial cheater will just "grow out of it" simply because you don't think you can do any better!
"I can't bring myself to break up with him because he is like perfect in every way (except the cheating) and I know that there is no way I could ever find someone as good as him, and then I think I would feel let down with like every guy I would try and date. Cause they wouldn't be an nice to me or wouldn't be as hot or the sex wouldn't be as good or anything."
Do you know how ridiculous what you wrote sounds to someone just reading your question? Either A) You really do think that he's better than you and that you can't do any better. In that case you really need to work on your self esteem. Just because you think he's somehow better than you(which he isn't) doesn't give him the right to cheat on you. Or B) You are seriously THAT shallow that you will stay with him because he's hot and rich, so that would entitle him to cheat on you?
I'm sorry for being so upfront and I don't mean to hurt your feelings, but it's the truth. You really need to open your eyes. Just because a guy is attractive doesn't mean that it's okay for him to cheat on you. You also shouldn't feel that you can't or won't get anybody better because TRUST ME you can. There are millions of people on this Earth, he is not the hottest, nicest, or best in bed. Even if he was, his actions make him an ugly person...he's the epitomy of a douche bag!
As far as him outgrowing it, probably not. He might one day, but it will probably be 15 years from now at the least. Some men never grow up, so don't rely on him to. So you can stay in a relationship and accept the fact that he doesn't respect you and probably thinks you're stupid because you let him run around banging other chicks because you don't think you can do any better. Or you can realize that you are a special person that deserves someone that won't treat you like crap (and yes, cheating on you is treating you like crap!).
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2009): He won't grow out of it because at the moment he's got the best of both worlds. He knows he has sex whenever he wants it with you at home feeding his ego by worshipping the ground he walks on and with his ego nicely topped up he can go out and charm any girl he fancies without any consequences as he is now just used to you turning a blind eye.
I know that may be a hard view to take but sometimes its good to be brought back down to earth. You can't do anything to change a guy, if he wanted you he wouldn't sleep with another girl. Simple as that.
You say you would feel let down by any other guy, but surely you feel let down by your boyfriend every time he has slept with another woman? I would consider cheating the worst possible way to let someone down! You also take all blame off of him saying he doesn't want to cheat. If he didnt want to cheat why would he make the effort to contact a girl from the movies? He did all the chasing there with the intention of sleeping with her.
What no one ever seems to consider is what the cheater might be catching, whats to say these girls he slept with aren't full of sexually transmitted diseases? Are you happy to let him pass these onto you too?
Learn to love and respect yourself, the sensible thing to do would be to end this relationship and no matter how much it hurts do not chase him. So what if sex with him is amazing, he's just picking up techniques from some other girl hes slept with before coming home to you.
Please value yourself higher than letting a charmer walk all over you. You need to believe you are worth more than that. I hope you find true love because it is a beautiful thing. Take Care.
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