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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: So I told my boyfriend that I don't want to do anything sexual with him mainly because it makes me feel uncomfortable. Well he gets mad at me cause I told him earlier I was going to gave him my virginity but I realize I wasn't ready. He called me a selfish bicth for only thinking of myself. I was very close to slapping him for that but instead I did storm off about he say that to me, I felt like crying. Then we made up we went out. To make a long story short he drop me off at my house and he likes to have a quick make out sesstion in his car before I leave. He started touching my chest something I don't like. I kept telling him to stop but he wouldn't so I actually did slap him (hard) on the cheek. Then I get out of his car and then spend that whole night crying. Now he won't talk to me. Am I being selfish? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, smilingApple  +, writes (12 June 2009):
you go girl! im so proud of you that you did that to that JERK. be glad that you are not with him anymore if you left him. but if you are still with him, girl it sure is time to let him go already.
trust me.
ive been in the same situation like yours recently.my last relationship you can say.
i left him for that same situation.
a guy who loves you would wait and not push you like that.
i learned my mistakes.
A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (6 June 2009):
 GOOD!
he was not deserving of your love in the first place!
Please know that not all men are like that, just little boys. And you do what you need to do to heal from this incident that your moron EX-boyfriend started.
(believe me, say it a few times with me with feeling...EX boyfriend... repeat...repeat again...feels quite refreshing when you get used to it, it tends to roll off the tongue).
Go out and live your life. You are so young and you have so much to see of this world.
Don't even give this jackass another thought...
Oh and just for shits and giggles...Lets all say it together one more time as we High 5 you from cyberspace...EX BOYFRIEND..LMAO!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI broke up with him
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A
female
reader, iSmil3y +, writes (4 June 2009):
No! He's selfish! I would've done the same thing to my boyfriend, too. Honestly, if he cared about you at all, He'd respect that you're not ready for sex, and wouldn't have called you a selfish bitch, he would've waited. I think you should dump him and you can find someone who's better than that, and someone who actually respects you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): good for you. There is something very wrong with this world where it is becoming an expectation that someone owes you sex. No one has that right to expect, deserve or feel owed it by anyone. Most of the people on this website are far too young and should be waiting until they are older and hey, what is wrong with waiting until you get married, maybe people just need to get married a bit younger, LOL! (but not too young, like after college or after high school|!)
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female
reader, Amy2007x  +, writes (3 June 2009):
 No way
well done for the slap
dont let anyone make you feel bad for not sleeping with them
its your body
its youre decison!!
x
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female
reader, krstl05 +, writes (3 June 2009):
I would have punched him in the face instead!! You go girl!!!
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female
reader, Shannon Williams  +, writes (3 June 2009):
 I think you should break up with him and try to find sombedy who cares and cna wait until you're ready
love
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A
female
reader, Katy. +, writes (3 June 2009):
 You're obviously smart enough to tell him you arn't ready for a sexual relationship, so you should be smart enough to realize where to go from here.He's a pathetic jerk and apart from all the other tools out there I don't think you would find one person that would agree with what he did.Leave the guy and move on, don't blame yourself for any of this, its guys like that, that need to learn how to respect women and understand sex is only a bonus to a relationship, not the relationship in itself.Katy x
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2009): they are right hes a tool, ditch hime, but do yourself a favour he aint worth trash talking just laugh at the little boy, and move on.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2009): Nice one grimmreality! But you are right if it was me i would have knocked a few of his teeth out. .and as satin said warn your mates he is a jerk and again you are not selfish x
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male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (3 June 2009):
 Your body, your choice. You are not ready yet? Then you are not ready yet. That ain't selfish, it is called being in charge of your own body.
You just got a preview of his true character, he calls you selfish but what does that make his own actions? You should have sex with him for his sake? No. If and when you have sex with someone, it should because you want it and he wants it, not for his sake.
He is only intrested in you for sex, if you continue with him, then you will always be trading sexual favors for his affection. Not a good basis for a relationship or your dignity.
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female
reader, babymama99 +, writes (3 June 2009):
 You are a classy young lady who has set her boundries and refuses to let any one cross them. He won't talk to you. Great now you wont have to spend your valuable time telling him to buzz off!lol, I bet he won't forget that slap anytime soon!!!Good for you!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2009): Tasteofindia you have my respect! No one answered better not even me x
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male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (3 June 2009):
I agree with Army Medic...(what's this...GrimmReality actually agreeing with somebody?)
You? Selfish? Then calls you a bitch?
If those were the words out of your BF's mouth he deserves to be throttled. Kudos to you young lady for going against societal norms and not giving it up! And now you know that he is an immature little punk that needs to learn some respect, and those kind of guys you will regret sleeping with.
So now you have a snapshot of what he wants, and that is to screw you, and thats it.
Once again, much respect to you for standing your ground. You did nothing wrong. Except maybe you should have knocked a tooth or two out of his blow hole and stuck a boot in his eye.
There are Gentlemen out there that will respect you./ They are a rare find but they do exist. I promise!
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (3 June 2009):
 WHOA, you didn't overreact at all, sister. Nobody could call you selfish for respecting yourself and your body and your limits. He's definitely the creep for trying to push you and make you feel bad for not giving him your virginity. Shows where his priorities are, my sweet!! I say ditch this creeper and find someone who respects you way to much to call you names and pressure you to do something you're not comfortable with!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2009): You don't WANT him to talk to you. A man who is willing to call you a "selfish bitch" in the very beginning, will do much worse throughout the relationship. He sounds like someone who will get abusive after a while, once he gets more comfortable with you and has to falling all over him. Just LEAVE. Please. You're going to continue getting yourself hurt so leave while you still have a really good chance. And if he tries to contact you later, STAY AWAY.
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male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (3 June 2009):
 Well tell him that he's now a single idiot! You aren't selfish I wish more girls had self respect like you do, Dump this guy, and you will in time find a guy who is actually worth your time.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2009): No your not selfish he is for not respecting you. only do what you are happy with oh and good on you for slapping him x
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male
reader, passionatelynumb +, writes (3 June 2009):
 NO! He is the one being selfish! If he cared or respected you at all, he would wait until you were ready. Even if that meant waiting a few years to have sex with you.
Trust me, he values sex more than he values you. Dump this jerk. You deserve much, much more than this guy.
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