A
male
age
30-35,
*llTimeHoe
writes:My ex and I broke up 8 months ago, I am 18, whilst she is 16. The UK allows legality of this relationship. So she's decided that she wants 'post break up' sex. She never understood my reasons for leaving, although they were as long as your arm. So I worry that she wants to have sex with me to try and get me back. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't mind fooling around, but I am worried it will mean a tonne more to her than it does to me. What should I do?
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female
reader, person12345  +, writes (16 June 2012):
 She wants to have sex because she wants to get back together. If you want to be with her again then do it. If you want to remain broken up, do not have sex with her.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (16 June 2012):
 The "answer" to your question is: That it's BOTH right AND wrong....
That is, it's RIGHT for those few minutes when you and she are doing nik-nik..... and it's WRONG the other 23 hours and 50 minutes every day....
Good luck.....
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (16 June 2012):
 Don't have sex with her. She is hoping that if you have sex again, you will take her back.
Doing the whole FWB with an ex is a recipe for disaster. And since she is only 16, she will have an even harder time separating the sex from a relationship.
If you do it, you will just break her heart all over again.
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A
male
reader, AllTimeHoe +, writes (16 June 2012):
AllTimeHoe is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the good answers. I'm going to avoid as you have said I should.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (16 June 2012):
 Yes, it will mean a tonne more to her. This is not at all about just sex, if she was just horny she could go with another guy without having to come to you, hat in hand. She either has big trouble moving on, or she is scheming to win you back, or both.
It's mature and considerate of you thinking that she is going to get hurt in the process, - she actually is. So... avoid. Tell her that exes are exes for a reason, and kindly decline her offer.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (16 June 2012):
 You are probably right ... she may be hoping to win you back with such fantastic sex you wont be able to walk away again. She hopes!
Or, because you dont say why you broke up in the first place, or what sort of girl she is, if she is a nasty sort she may also be planning some sort of revenge, claiming the sex act was non consensual (it has been know to happen) or even forcing you into a relationship by claiming pregnancy (also has been known to happen).
Tell her thanks but no thanks.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (16 June 2012):
 'I am worried it will mean a tonne more to her than it does to me'
100% correct...
She is asking because she thinks it will win you back.
Don't do it, just say no!!
If you do, you will end up hurting her in a worst way and make things really akward for yourself.
Say no thanks, and walk!!
:-)
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 June 2012):
I think you need to step up here and be the gentleman and say no, for the reason that you wrote. I think that she is trying to get you back, and it will mean more to her than it will to you.
I think that you're mature enough to know that whilst yes she's 16 and it's legal, this is not a clever or mature decision on her part. She will end up hurt when she realizes you're not coming back, and she'll feel used.
Also, if she never understood your reasons for leaving, then chances are this could turn nasty.
Simply put, you're better off finding someone else, as is she. This will screw her up, and you can be a much better guy by just leaving her in the past for her to move on.
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