A
male
age
36-40,
*hatguy88
writes:Wanted to ask a question toward the women, because i think it happens to them more than guys. Do you always have a thing for the guy that took your virginity? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2010): NO - although I am biased because my virginity was stolen from me without my permission.
However I think I will always have feeling for my genuine first love. Not in love feelings but caring feelings, like you have a secret between the two of you.
A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (4 October 2010):
 I lost mine to someone I was totally in love with (and he loved me too) and delirously happy with so yes I will always have a soft spot for him but I'd never want him back in a million years because when our relationship went sour it did so in spectactular fashion!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2010): In my case - DEFINITELY NOT !!
My guy was definitely a "wrong-un". So wrong infact that he is now in prison!! - Mind you I can only blame myself and I will never be able to turn the clock back!!
Always wait for the right guy!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2010): I never spoke to my cherry popper again afterwards =]
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2010): losing my virginity to who i did was a huge mistake which resulted in the greatest blessing ... my son is the best mistake i ever made, wished i'd been wiser in my choices and given him a better dad but there is not one day that passes that i regret my son ... he is my world and my reason to be wiser :)
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A
female
reader, juliefofulie +, writes (1 October 2010):
 A "thing" for him, no. Didn't even fancy him all that much back then, to be honest. But we were together for three years, and are still friends to this day. A soft spot in my heart as someone who I went through the trenches of the teenage years with? Absolutely. But I do not miss sex with him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2010): im 25 male, virgin, and gonna lose it to two hookers. I'll have no regrets as logically it makes sense for me to do this after failed relationships. Will I remember? most def but not in any attachment sort of way.
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (1 October 2010):
 No not at all - my "first" is getting married in a few months and I could not care less, I have absolutely no feelings for the guy whatsoever! I havent even seen him in about 6 or 7 years and horrible as this sounds, I bet I would not even recognise him (or him recognise me) if we passed each other in the street. I have changed loads since I was 16 so I imagine he has too!
I dont regret losing my virginity to him, it was the right thing to do at the time. But equally, it was right for us to break up and while it was hard, we are both well and truly over it and have never looked back!
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (1 October 2010):
 Absolutely, positively....no
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (1 October 2010):
 I think it depends on a lot of things. Personally, I have a HUGE soft spot for my first BF and I always will have.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 October 2010):
 Not at all.Luckily my tastes in reference to men have changed and evolved in time !
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (1 October 2010):
 "A thing" as in fond memories, or as in we'd abandon the current guy for the first guy?
Things didn't work out for me and my first. Do I want him back? No. Do I miss him? No. Do thoughts of him enter my mind during intimate time? No. Do I fantasize about it or him? No. Was he the right guy for me? No, as it turns out. Did I make a mistake? No, at the time, it was the right thing. Do I regret it? No.
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A
female
reader, misLadYd..  +, writes (1 October 2010):
 oh yes.you always go back to the first time you had sex and of course you wil think about the ex but i wouldnt say its a thing you got for him because by that time maybe you both moved on
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A
female
reader, Fiona xxx +, writes (1 October 2010):
 I would say 'yes' but only in a rational way, the same as for anybody else. Anybody I have slept with has a special place in my heart, from first, to ONS to my now husband.
Being in your first sexual relationship does change you and it's a milestone. I would like to assume that most girls were smitten with their first as well and that it was as special as it could be. So unless the circumstances are really bad, I expect people would look back in a fond-ish way. As I say not too fondly though, otherwise why didn't the relationship last.
I don't believe in trying to re-enact things though. There was a time, a couple of years later when I had a chance for a ONS with my first. I did go back with him, but morally I didn't want to use him in that way or feel used by him, when I had no intentions of getting back together.
Perhaps I look back on things and realise that when you are 18 you allow relationships to be spoiled by a couple of arguments or misunderstandings.
I guess it depends on how you describe that 'thing for' that you are mentioning. If it's still love or wanting to get back together, then who knows you could be heading for either romance or problems.
I have not slept with many people, which is why I think that the guys have some sort of place in my heart.
Fiona
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