A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I found out my wife been cheating on me. Do I tell her father and mother?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): Hi Guys, why are you all wanting to take the high road and cushion the brutal truth. if she was so disrespectful to cheat on you, then she must pay the price. full stop.
sometimes just saying it is better. no hidden words and meanings. after all you are the devastated party and it may even settle the score a bit.
(a little tit for tat, anyone............)
-LoveGirl
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2010): You can "tell" them without telling them. Call 'em up. Tell them you and their daughter aren't going to be staying together. When they ask why, tell them to ask their daughter.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2010): The best way this is handled is the way my brother handled it.
His in-laws wanted to know why the divorce happened. He told them that they really needed to talk to his ex-wife (their sister/daughter/aunt) if they wanted to know anything.
Really, in the end, other people usually figure it out.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2010): If your wife could lie to you and betray you, what stops her from giving her family and your common friends the 'embellished'truth. Please lkearn one thing in life: people, (esp those who cheat) tend to shift blkame, tend to speak half truths and convincingly lie. If you speak to others who have been wronged, find out hiw many of them have been made the bad guy. Stories start circulating by their cheating spouses and the faithful ones lives are made hell. Why? Bec these people take the honiurable road, don't discuss their spouses affairs yet theie characters are tarnished in the end.So YES her family needs to know. The sooner the better or else they will get an embellished version of the truth and then not only will you look like a whimp and a cuckold all over again, you will look like a monster too. Don't think she won't do it again: women have a tendancy of lieing convincingly, shedding crocodile tears and getting away with murder.Your decision ultimately BUT don't be a fool the second time. A little shame would not hurt a cheater. Getting even and more.....
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A
male
reader, Cccc  +, writes (15 October 2010):
 I would.Girls never leave the relationship wanting to be the BAD GUY in the story so not letting the news out makes life easier for her and she might just make you look like the bad guy.This happened to a guy I know whos really the best guy a girls could ask for but hes now being slandered by her friends and family cause no one ever told anyone what really happened so now hes looking like the bad guy!...Set the record straight ill say!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2010): Yes, tell them. Before you can be sure she won't do it again, you should make her "own" what she did. Bring it out into the light of day. Let he feel the true pain caused by her actions. Why should you be hurt, and then let her get away without feeling the full impact of what she did. Respect, one of the posters asked for. Respect? Is that something g she really deserves in this context. And why is is respectful to enable her to hide her misbehavior and act like she never did what she did.
No, she should own what she did...
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A
female
reader, Tbosse  +, writes (15 October 2010):
 Yes, tell them
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A
male
reader, slimfish  +, writes (15 October 2010):
 you can tell who you like.
but should you tell anyone?. i would have thought this was something between the two of you only.
do you want to save your marriage?.
what did your wife give as a reason for cheating.
listen carefully to what she has to say, and act on that if you need to. there must have been some good reason to make her do this.
the only person i would tell if it was me in this position would be a marriage councilor.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (15 October 2010):
 Why ? She is not under age I guess. You can decide if forgiving her or leaving her, but anyway it's between you and her.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2010): Why not tell them. If she didn't want people to know about it then she should not have done it.
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A
female
reader, cheannryl  +, writes (15 October 2010):
 I agree with raphael,and let your wife be the one to tell her parents.a little respect.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (15 October 2010):
 Well what have you done about it? Have you confronted her about it and asked her why? Or do you know why she cheated? Does she still love you? Do you love her? There really is no reason to actually tell your in-laws because right now it is between her and you.
I hope that helps.
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