A
female
age
30-35,
*amm
writes:My boyfriend and I have been intimate for 11 months now and i have not yet received the pleasure of having a orgasm. We have tried many different things and yet it has not happened. We were wondering if anyone could give us any suggestions on a way we can try or be guaranteed to make this happen.Im not very sensitive all the time, sometimes hardly knowing he is in me at all, and other times i enjoy it but nothing happens from it.
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male
reader, leonard j.Douglas  +, writes (15 July 2007):
All orgasms are all about Foreplay, that's all the wonderful touchy things we do to each other's bodies.Like caressing, hugging,kising and being there for each other, but not just there in the bedroom. Your vagina is kind of like a closed flower, that needs the warmth of the sun to slowly open up. And that is what Foreplay is like to your vagina. Us men don't need this warm-up time unlike a woman's body. Yet it's a wise man who waits for a woman's Passionflower,vagina, to fully open up, before he comes-a-calling. Once the outer and inner vaginal lips, The Major and Minor Labia have fully opened-up. Then the clitoris will come into plain view, at the upper junction of the vagina where the vaginal lips come togethere.is a small button of flesh that is your clitoris. And with gentle,kind ongoing,stroking, clitoral stimulation. You'll have those wonderful orgasms. And it is the "CLITORIS" that is a woman's "ORGASMIC TRIGGER", when it comes to her orgasms. If you really want to grow together in your sexual togetherness. Please get some good sex books on how to Love each other's body and mind, as they really are one.
A
female
reader, sillzsarah  +, writes (15 July 2007):
 i agree with yummymummy u need to experiment and find out wat u feel is plesurable and right ask ur bf if he could maybie do it a little bit harder for u and see if that works... mail me if u need any help xxx
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A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (15 July 2007):
 it is very normal for girls to find it hard to orgasm from sex. you need some other stimulation as well as sex i think. have you tried oral sex? it sounds like you may need to try clitoral stimulation, which is something you wont get from intercourse alone. there are also some websites that you could look at to give the two of you some info on pleasuring eachother inc. sexinfo101.com - this site gives sex tips on improving sex, pleasing women, positions etc. sites like this give you info on how to enjoy sex more and different ways to please eachother. i hope this advice helps feel free to email if you want more info!! good luck xxx
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (15 July 2007):
 You and your guy need to play around a little more. If you really don't feel like you are getting anything out of sex then why not try seeing a doctor just to check things are ok.
xxxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, kristinakutie  +, writes (15 July 2007):
 ok, this is a tuffy.. but i'm going to give you some tips.. ok, 1st off, i'm going to give you a few new positions to try: 1) try sitting on his lap with having intercourse, and rather then just moving up and down, and making yourself tired, try moving forward and backward as well... and then you could also lean back while you are sitting on his lap,which would be allowing him to play with your clit, which mite help you out a bit. (and also, remember that sex isnt just about pleasing your man, its about pleasing both of you.. so dont just try to please him, maybe thats what is wrong too)2) ok, let him lay on his side, and but both of your legs over his hip, so he can thrust into you that way.. and its a very relaxing way to have intercourse, it mite be helpful.. 3) ok, this is going to sound completely weird, but trust me, it works.. ok.. find a table that is like up to his hip.. you should lay down on it and maybe put your rite leg on his shoulder and your left one you can just leave on the table, but dont let it flop, make it so your foot is on the table.. let him thrust into you like that, and because of the position, and because it is new it mite make you orgasism.. it mite take a few times because i know its probably going to feel like you are following instructions and trying to remember what to do.. but if you dont always remember what to do, just do what feels rite.. and also because of the position, it allows him to play with your clit very easily and that def helps.. ok well, i hope that one of those helps you.. and if you dont have any luck, i have a few more positions that i would be happy to explain to you. good luck =]
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A
female
reader, peachlacy +, writes (15 July 2007):
If you know how to pleasure yourself than you will be able to tell your boyfriend how to do it for your. So have a practice on your self on your own first.
If your trying to orgasm from vaginal sex then don't worry that it hasn't happened some women never experience it while others are lucky. You've heard of the G-spot it's this small area in the vaginal wall which is really sensitive. If your boyfriend finds this area and stimulates it then you should feel a more during sex.
Otherwise just enjoy the intamacy that sex brings and enjoy loving your boyfriend. As putting to much pressure on the having the orgasm thing is just going get in the way of enjoying sex.
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A
male
reader, Jonty +, writes (15 July 2007):
 Have you tried sex toys? A rampant rabbit would give you an orgasm and then he could penertrate you to recieve his.
If you are not keen on this idea, try going on top, a lot of women can only orgasm in this position.
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A
female
reader, nailglitter18  +, writes (15 July 2007):
 I was exactly the same way! Some people would suggest warming lubricants, or vibrators, but I suggest going for a book called "What Your Mother Never Told You About Sex"- because there's a lot about it that people just don't know! And it could be making you miserable!
Never underestimate the power of foreplay. Candles, soft music, sexy lingerie, and maybe playful strip shows can all add to the mood. Start with hands, get to know each other's "private parts" - what makes him feel good? What makes you feel good? Communicate. If talking it through feels weird, then encourage him with moans and stroking if something he does feels particularly good. Move your hips to guide his hands to places you want. And most importantly: relax. Funnily enough, this very important aspect is the hardest to achieve!! If you're not relaxed, it may feel great, but you wont go all the way.
Once you've had your fun there, if you really want to move on (but it feels so goood), have him look for your G-spot (make sure you have enough natural lubrication down there- if not, try some astroglide, or some other water-based lubricant, otherwise it'll get dry and irritating down there). The G-spot is a little piece of heaven right inside your vagina. It feels like a spongy spot on the front wall. He should make beckoning motions with his finger when he finds that spot that makes you feel good. TO YOU it'll feel like nothing you've ever really experienced- it will eventually lead to what is called the female ejaculatory orgasm (also known as the "need to pee" orgasm). Look it up for more info. ;)
Those two steps should warm you up for intercourse, and make everything in there much more sensitive, as the blood supply increases with the attention. give it a try, see what happens.
This is all just from personal experience, research, and the advice of other great Agony Aunts on this site. Anyone who has info, or corrections, please let me know, too ! :P
Good luck, Samm! Remember to stay safe. :)
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