A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am a bit confused. I am almost 20 and i have yet to go on a date. I also have never held hands, hugged, or even kissed a guy before. I consider myself to be fairly attractive...kind of plain. I'm what most people would consider to be a goody goody. I go to church every sunday, i dont do drugs or smoke, i dont drink, and i've never even gotten a ticket. is this why guys dont like me? am i too boring? maybe guys like girls with more experience?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2009): I'm 19 years old and I never dated anyone and I'm in the same boat as you. I'm way too boring because I have nothing to say or what to say on the first or second date. I'm not out going because my parent won't allow me to go out at all. So I figured I need to do something before its too late. My suggestions is try to make your self more busy and try to go out and join a club or volunteer and meet up with your friends. Also, go to the library.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (5 October 2009):
Don't change. You seem like a fantastic girl! It could be that guys just don't think you're interested in them. Try talking to them, or taking up another hobby where men are and just getting to know them. There's no rush, take your time and you'll find the right guy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys! you really helped a lot!
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A
female
reader, HereAreMyTwoCents +, writes (5 October 2009):
 Don't ever give up the good lifestyle and the morals that you have established in your life, just so that guys will find you more approachable. Those kinds of guys, they're not the kinds of guys you would want approaching you anyway. If you want to find a nice guy, who is nice like you and shares your morals, you need to look for him at church or in places where good people like you can be found hanging out. Don't ever start to smoke or drink or do drugs just so you can fit in and be more popular like the majority. That majority, someone with your convictions is really not going to like what that majority has to offer, so do your best to avoid them, not try to attract them. Now, as far as attracting that nice guy... you said you feel a little plain... well, I don't know what you look like... but whoever you are, whatever you look like, I would advise you to just dress up nice in something that is flattering but not slutty, and to put on your best smile, and your best friendly and approachable personality, and just walk up to that nice guys that has morals, and say "Hi! My name is So and So. How are you?" Just start chatting him up with small talk about weather, the sermon at church, the fellowship meal after the sermon, or whatever is going on in the moment. And, before the first conversation ends make sure you have established some sort of link with him for the future such as: 1) You have gotten to the point of exchanging number, 2)You have determined that you will both be here again in the same place same time next Sunday, or 3) You have decided to go on a date together. Basically, before that conversation ends, make sure you have some sort of way to link up with him again. And don't wait for him to make the move on a phone number or a date with you. The fear of rejection is no excuse for inaction, same as the fear of failure is no excuse for not trying, same as with everything in life. Good luck. And PS Big Kudos to you for keeping a drug free, alcohol free lifestyle. You're doing yourself a huge favor in the long run, for your health, and for the kinds of people you end up attracting in your social circle. There is no feeling that a substance can give you, that a happy healthy drug-free lifestyle can't give you ten times better!
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A
male
reader, Heartbroken in love +, writes (5 October 2009):
here's what I can say as a guy. you seem like a nice girl and I really hope u don't get caught in thinking you have to be different then you are to attract a good man. the kind of man you will attract if start trying be different will probably be some ass that just tries to use you for one thing. stay true to yourself and establish you individuality and let that be your selling point. good luck
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A
female
reader, sunnycomet  +, writes (5 October 2009):
 Don't put yourself down. You sound like a nice person with good morals. If any guys interest you at church why don't you try to get to know them and see how that goes. Meet with people that have morals close to yours and people you can get along with.Do you really want to date someone who smokes, does drugs, drinks, etc? If you pretend to be someone you are not it will only make you unhappy. If you get someone who you are not compatible with then you will be more unhappy. Take your time and you will find the right guy for you. Don't rush into it or do anything that you will regret later on. I hope you meet someone nice soon, Good Luck!
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A
male
reader, dicaprio174 +, writes (5 October 2009):
Not really. There most be other reasons. Do you have friends? do you go out and socialize? do you smile? how often do you have a conversation with a guy? and what's it about?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): experience? No more likely a charming personality and a sense of humor. Looks and experience take a back seat to these two things.
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A
male
reader, pervertatilex  +, writes (5 October 2009):
do things that show off your confidence and good traits. i doubt anyone would want to waste time with someone who considers themselves in a negative way. be you and comfortable with yourself better to be goody than well known girl for easy scores
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