A
male
age
41-50,
Mr.Bisteeya
writes:Here are the top 10 reasons that it's HER fault the relationship didn't work.Reason 1: You aren't cool enough.Guys love cool girls, its probably our favorite characteristic for a girl we want to keep around longer than 2 hours. The problem is, finding one is just as rare as finding a talking blue unicorn. Sure some girls are tolerable, but a colonoscopy is tolerable, we want enjoyable.A girl that wants to watch football with us is NOT necessary, we are perfectly ok with you being left out of that, but if you do watch and actually watch and care to learn, then that's an example of cool. If you watch and ask stupid ass questions, talk about anything during the game that isn't related to football, get up and leave for an hour and come back and ask "what happened while I was gone?" then you are not cool.Girls, if you are stuck in a situation that isn't optimal but one you chose to be in with your man, don't complain, make the best of it. Making the best of it = cool, cool = you get to stay around. If you say "sure I will go to the sporting goods store with you", then we get there and you bitch about how you are ready to leave, we will leave early just for you, so I can drop your whiney ass off at your house. You are not cool.If we are all out, its late, you are tired, I am having a blast. If you make sure everyone knows that you don't want to be there or make a big deal about how we have to go home, then you are not cool. You are tolerable. Guys fuck tolerable girls, we don't date them long term.If you cant accept the fact that even if we are with you that we still think other women are hot, you are not cool. Just because I am with you and we are both choosing to be with each other doesn't automatically turn me gay. If a girl walks by with unnecessary cleavage exploding out of her top, even when I am 67 I am going to say "holy shit did you see that?" If you are disgusted by this then you are choosing to ignore reality and how men think, you are not cool.It's the way the world works, embrace it and say back "I saw them, I actually had to refrain myself from motorboating them." You just put yourself in a 5% class of cool women by saying and meaning that comment.Side note, if you cry when we say this, we will pretend to care and comfort you, but I can assure you what we are really thinking about is exit strategy.Reason 2: Rush rush rush rush rush to claim him as yoursQuestion: "Do you think he is seeing anyone else?"Answer: "Well I hope so, he is a single guy with a lot to offer, of course he is seeing other women. You have known him two weeks, so in two weeks you want him to shut off communication with all other women and be just yours? You just turned into every girl ever, welcome to the club."First off, you don't even know him, how can you be so confident you even want him to be all yours? Why, because he makes you smile and your belly all tingly when he looks at you? So does a twin pack of Twinkies and root beer out of a glass bottle, but you don't see me trying to marry it. The point is, you aren't even sure if he is someone you want to be with, so why force him to commit until you know yourself?Plus, you don't own him, its none of your business who he is seeing or not seeing, if you try to make it your business you will be put into a crazy category very quickly. That doesn't mean he won't still call you, because crazy girl sex is great, but he isn't going to date you.If he wasn't dating anyone at all you would think "I wonder what's wrong with him, why isn't he seeing anyone", if he is dating multiple girls then you would think "He's a player". So he is fucked either way anyway, just chill and see what happens.You need to worry about 1 thing, that's YOU. You worry about yourself, be yourself and if he is attracted to that and wants to pursue then he will start weeding out the other women, but expecting him to drop them after a few dates is ice pick/fatal attraction crazy.Reason 3: You put out too soon.Waiting accomplishes quite a few things.One is that if you are truly looking for a relationship then it weeds the players out. A player wont wait a month to sleep with you, if that's not happening by about date number 3 then he is typically out(from what I hear because obviously I wouldn't know this from personal experience).He will be into you, dates, phone calls, etc etc but if he see's it is getting him no where, he will bail and get to weed him out quickly.However, the most important reason is that it gives the two of you the chance to get to know each other and your personalities without orgasms clouding your judgement. Obviously there is physical attraction or the two of you wouldn't even be going out on dates, now its time to make the emotional connection and chemistry.Out of all the women I have been "intimate" with in the past 3 years of being single, 4 girls have stood out. 4 of them I have created very strong feelings and emotional attachments with. I waited longer than 1 month before I slept with all 4 of them, coincidence? I think not…Making a guy wait lets him know that you aren't just another girl "giving it up". It tells him that the two of you are going to have to get to know each other much better than a few drinks before you let him plow you.It's a fact, guys tend to slow down and put forth less effort once they get the prize. If we get the prize too soon then we really don't have much invested and she hasn't shown us enough to want to keep her around, so why not just cut bait and find another. However, if during this waiting period we get to know her and realize we like spending time with her, like her personality, then it's a new ballgame. There is incentive to keep seeing you, because we like you AND we get to pound you for hours daily.The bottom line is that anytime you have sex with someone immediately, that becomes the foundation. You now have a relationship built on blow jobs and reverse cowgirl instead of a relationship built on chemistry, intimacy, trust, laughter, admiration, adoration and compatibility. In most cases you will be written off as a potential girlfriend and the two of you will continue having sex together until you ask him "where are we going with this?"Anticipation, one of my favorite words and feelings. It makes everything better, more special, more significant, more exciting, more rewarding. Growing up one of my favorite times of the year were the few days leading up to Christmas morning. Do you remember how exciting those days were? How about the night before Christmas, laying in your bed trying to make yourself go to sleep but not being able to? Waking up at 6:30am the next morning without an alarm clock to open the living room door to find a mountain of gifts…Do you remember the excitement that morning? I do, I feel it right now. So let's say instead of that scenario, its 5 days before Christmas you are sitting at the breakfast table eating Captain Crunch. Your parents walk by the table and throw a bag of unwrapped gifts on the table and walk off. Sure the gifts are good and fun, but wasn't it more rewarding and memorable to you when you built anticipation for it?Wait at least a month, stop yourselves in the middle of a hot make out session at least 7 or 8 times, if he stays around for that then he is into you and will make it that much hotter when it does actually happen. Reason 4: You aren't hot enough.Every man has thought this at some point in his life:"You mean, I am going to have to be with the same woman for the rest of my life?"It's a scary realization, its like buying a car and knowing that you can never trade it in when it gets old or doesn't run as good as it did when you first bought it. So, if you are standing at the lot and there is a red Ferrari and a 91 Honda Accord with the paint chipped off and a bumper sticker that says "bitch on board", which do you think we are going to pick? Even a Ferrari will still look good in 25 years… Also, if you don't take care of yourself now and put much emphasis on physical appearance then I doubt in 5 years after you "have us" that you are going to wake up one day and start.Unfortunately its true, for men, you being hot plays into our minds way more than even we want it to. Guys, we have all met girls that we enjoyed spending time with, made us laugh/smile but just isn't hot enough to pursue. We have all said this before "man, the new girl is cool as hell, she just isn't hot enough to stay with long term."Its very important for men to have a hot girlfriend when bringing her around friends, going out to eat, company functions, etc etc. It's good for our ego, keep a guy's ego fueled and he will stay happy. I have known girls who were so much fun to spend time with but got passed by when they were handing out hot as a baby, so I choose less populated places that I knew I wouldn't know a bunch of people when taking her out. (You want to hear the truth right?)Shitty? Yes.Reality? Yes.Men are visual, its how are brains are wired, embrace it and succeed or fight for what's "right" and stay single.Reason 5: You can't openly communicate.You clam up when its time to discuss important issues. You sweep things under the rug. You can't successfully communicate your thoughts into words so we can know what's going on in that head of yours. You don't tell us when we do things that piss you off. You don't tell us when we do things that you like. You are mad about something and don't tell us what or why.All of these things lead to misunderstandings and resentment.Perfect example:We have been dating 3 months, I fish every Saturday morning from 6am to 2pm, you have tap dance class every Saturday morning from 10 to 12. I am thinking it's a perfect situation, you get to do what you want, I get to do what I want. However you are secretly wishing that every once in a while I would surprise you and come to your class and watch you or be more involved since it's your passion. One day you snap and go off about how I don't care about your hobbies and you wish that just once I would come watch and pretend to care. The entire time I am thinking we are operating in an optimal situation, and you are becoming more and more upset every Saturday that I don't show up. 50 years of that? I'd rather be tied to the back of a train and drug 100 miles through piles of infected hypodermic needles.I have a CRAZY idea, how about you just tell me that's something you would like for me to do and I will do it. Complex I know.Oh wait, then I will hear "I shouldn't have to ask you, you should just want to be interested and show me." Keep thinking that way, while you are at it go ahead and buy the tshirt now "Always a brides maid, never a bride."Stop fighting what works because of principle or some grand idea of how life, men and relationships should be in your head, do what works instead. What works is, tell us what you want and what you are thinking. If you expect us to read your mind then you are setting yourself up for disappointment.Reason 6: You don't bring enough to the table."When I am with him, I feel so alive.""He balances me out and brings stability to my life.""He makes me feel so desirable in and out of the bedroom.""He has such a good stable family.""He is a man, makes me feel safe when I am with him.""He is honest, I know he wouldn't lie to me.""He gives me space, isn't clingy.""He can dress up and go to a nice function with me, but he can also get dirty hunting and be happy, he is so balanced.""He has such a good job, good money, great benefits and stable, he is very ambitious."All great reasons to be with someone, sounds like he is a great catch, but on the flip side what do you bring?That's great that I bring stability to your life, but you bring instability. That's great that I make you feel desirable in and out of the bedroom, but what do you offer in the desire department? How do you make me feel desirable? By having sex with me? That doesn't make me feel desirable. That's great that I have a stable family and yes Christmas's at the Parrish's house will be great, like Norman Rockwell. However, your parents are divorced, you and your dad's new wife hate each other, you and your mom fight all the time because she thinks you are irresponsible, your brother is a drunk, your sister will bring some guy named Vick with a gold chain around his neck to Thanksgiving and your mom will leave crying, your grandmother will tell you that you need to lose weight, you will cry and I will be in the middle of it. That's great for you that I don't lie to you and you can always trust me, but for some reason you have trouble telling the whole truth. I'm glad that I give you space, it must be a nice feeling, I wouldn't know, you texted me 11 times while I was out with the guys asking if we were with girls and when we were coming home. Me being balanced is great for you, but when I ask you to go to walmart with me, you tell me you have to change, fix your hair and put on make up. Or when I ask you to ride the 4 wheeler with me, you cringe and ask if you have to. I agree, I have a great job and will always being able to provide financial flexibility for our family. You work at a tanning salon and dropped out of college half way through because it "wasn't fun".Point is, you have to make me and my life better or why would I enter into a relationship with you? What do you offer? What can you offer me/us long term? If you don't make me better then I might as well just be single. Right? Reason 7: You are insecure."Baby, you look amazing in that dress…""No I don't, you are just saying that."When I hear that, the first thing I think is "you know it would be nice to be with someone who believed in herself and appreciated when I compliment her instead of always questioning it." Or I think "you know, it would be nice if the closet door burst open and 15 white wolves jumped out and ate you while you were still alive and probably still bitching about the dress."Not only is this annoying, its also a wonderful way to push your man right into the arms of a woman who would appreciate him complimenting her and is confident in herself. If you say things like that, be aware, your man is most likely keeping you around until something better comes along. How hard is it to take his compliment and say "Thanks babe, I love when you tell me things like that, makes me feel so pretty." You really don't understand how good it feels for a man to hear that.Maybe your vocal chords are made different than ours and those words require more effort, but I doubt it.To really discuss the topic of insecurity it would take 10 blogs, all I can say is that insecurity bleeds into all areas of your life, especially your relationships with others. Its easy to spot and very unappealing, guys also know for the most part, its not getting any better.One more example:Him: "I think I am going to do something with Jack tonight, you should call your girlfriends and do something with them"Her: "I just don't understand why you are choosing him over me, it seems like if you loved me you would want to do something with me tonight"Him: "Seriously, I wish a train would hit you right now"Reason 8: You are clingy.Men need space. Give it to us and don't bitch about it. I can't put it any more simple than that.Sometimes we need to go sit on the mower, go to Lowes, watch TV, go fishing, sit in the recliner in peace and quiet, go drink beer with our friends where we can act like guys, go to the camp for the weekend and not call to check in.None of those things mean we don't love you or want to be with you, it just means we need space and time away from you.No, you can't go to the camp with me. No, you can't go drink beers with us even though you think are a "guy's girl". No, I don't want you to help me organize my tools. Actually, they are organized, I am just pretending they aren't so I can have some time away from you. No, you can't go ride in the golf cart with me this time and no I am not going to answer your constant texts while I am on the course.Can we please go somewhere and you not be right underneath my feet or looking to see who I am talking to or texting every second? Go talk to your friends, make new ones, you act like if you leave my side you will explode. Be a person independent of me from time to time, please…Reason 9: You are impossible to please.Lets just get straight to the point, men were not built to please women. Everything we want to do naturally, typically does not please a woman without some level of thought and adjusting. Think about that for a minute.So, when we do the adjusting and it still doesn't please you AND you can't clearly communicate what it is that pleases you then we immediately start scanning the room for a new girlfriend or a pistol.The restaurant we picked wasn't good enough. The food we ordered was too spicy. The hotel we stayed in was too far from our destination.But, if I would have got the one closer then you wouldn't have been pleased because it was too expensive. The ice cream I picked up was the wrong brand. I don't give you enough affection, so I try and it's too much affection.You see the pattern? Helen Keller can even see that pattern.Is it really that hard to be easy going? Just go with the flow, unless its something that is going to kill you, just make the best of it. If the seats I got us for the concert are next to the speakers and its too loud, well at least we are here, see the positive, not the negative.Men try so hard to show you that we care about you and when all we get back is the feeling that it wasn't good enough, it makes us want to never do anything for you again. There aren't many statements out there that are more true than that one. Maybe you should read it again. We all know girls like this and we know guys that have girlfriends like this. Something is always wrong, not done right, too loud, too quiet, too spicy, too bland, too early, too late, it doesn't matter, its just not going to be good enough.Well I assure you, it will be good enough for someone else and you will find that out the hard way. Reason 10: You are nuts.Very common reason. You are just plain nuts, there is no other way to say it.Its been two weeks and you ask me if I ever wonder how we were ever happy without each other.You freak out, and cause a scene, literally, because you see me talking to another girl. You snap because I don't answer your call when it comes in, so you call over and over again until I answer. You cry because you think I don't love you, on date number 4. You tell me to drive you by your ex's house on our first date so you can see who's car is there(this actually happened, her initials are AF). You look through my phone and read my text messages. You tell me you picked me up something at the mall and its 600 dollars worth of clothes after we have dated a week.I just think that some women didn't get enough hugs growing up and now they are just insane, literally. Or maybe they have just put up with too much shit from too many ex's, now their brains are fried and turned clinically crazy. Either way, I didn't ask to deal with it so keep your crazy to yourself and your cats.There you go, top 10 ways it's her fault.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): Dang, my typing. What I meant to say instead of you have risen to the level of your ability to keep a woman, I meant: You have risen to the level of your incompetence to keep a woman haven't you?
Ok.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): OMG, it's you again.
Please google misogynist and narcissistic personality disorder....and then look in the mirror.
I can hear some valid points in a couple of your arguments but you define women at a very shallow and paltry level and you have risen to the level of your ability to keep a woman, haven't you?
Bitter yes, ridiculous yes, sad yes, intelligent and thought provoking, NO.
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female
reader, alexroliepolie +, writes (14 June 2009):
 I am a few months from being 18, you are a little less than twice my age and I bet that I am more knowledgeable on relationships than you. Why they don't work out and DEFINITELY more on why they do. I honestly feel really bad for you. Reading this made me extremely frustrated, but after I finished, I sat back and had to think about why this man is so bitter against women. You generalize us as if we're all the same. No matter how many women you date, there will always be faults. Some will be the same in all women, but I only agreed with one of your points, which was being insecure. So, a lot of women are insecure and they need to learn how great they are... And? It could be because articles like this, claiming we're not cool or hot enough for you, that makes us feel so insecure. And about being "impossible to please" Pth. Talk to girls about it. We have legitimate reasons in our frustrations with men, not just reasons like appearance, your perception of our sanity or "lack" thereof. I don't think males really understand women until they appreciate everything. Good and bad. You need a dating experience with someone who will show you that you can't generalize women. And for heaven's sake, quit judging people. You are judgmental. Just chill and be happy man. No wonder you've been single for 3 years. You need to be happy. Try writing an article that isn't about why you don't like women, but why you do... And don't be a stereotypical pig about it either. It's not about boobs or butts. Pleh. Be a MAN, not a high school boy. We have enough of those.
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reader, vamp-gal  +, writes (8 June 2009):
 1) Aren't cool enough? You should love the woman you're with no matter whether they're cool enough or not. It's not a factor it's an opinion of SOME people that comes into their love lives. If they don't like football they don't like football, if they do they do, pretty simple really. Women are not perfect and neither are men. They forget things especially if it's something new. You can't have it all, men and women all have imperfections and you have to deal with them.2) We can't exactly 'claim him as ours' because we don't know what's going on in his life and wouldn't it be better to get to know the person? On the flip side if we rush into things it could turn out badly. We can't predict the future and we can't predict the reaction we're going to get from them. 3) You're making this sound like ALL women do this. Well they don't/wouldn't. You just have to look for that person who wouldn't. But then would they come under 'un-cool' because they might not do other things that you want them to be like. And sometimes women do this because they feel like they are being rushed into things by men. It works both ways, you can't blame it on one gender.4) Not hot enough? You have got to be kidding me. That's just plain shallow. It should be what the persons personality is like and what they are like. It's what's on the inside not the outside. Yeah sure it might cross your mind once or twice, but if you looked deeper you would probably realize that you love them no matter what they look like.5) Of course women clam up when they're speaking to guys. Same with when men talk to women. It's nerve-wracking talking to they guy you've liked for ages you don't want to do/say something that will put them off forever. It's alright saying we should be confident when talking but what if you don't know the guy and barely talk to him? What are you supposed to talk about? Especially face-to-face because sometimes with some people you find one thing that you don't have in common and you give up thinking that's it. You can't design a rule-book because everyone is different and you can't control peoples reactions.6) Don't bring enough to the table, well in answer to the 'financial stability' what happened to (in marriage) "For richer, for poorer" - shouldn't this count outside of marriage. Everyone has financial problems, you can't get away from that. It's a fact. Few people in the world don't but that's about it. But should something like that control your life? Especially if you're in love with that person anyway? Family does come into it a bit, but if you love someone, who cares? Family is family you won't cut them out of your lives no matter what a person can't control what kind of family they have. Thing is you don't exactly have to see them everyday of your lives. 7) We're not exactly going to say "Oh yeah I knew that" when you give us a compliment. It catches us off guard and we don't know what to say. And some of us believe what you're saying but either don't want to admit it or they don't want to come across as being self-absorbed or something like that. It's easier to say that you're lying because then we can think that we don't and it makes us prepared for anything. We love that you compliment us and it does make us feel great. But we don't know what to say to it so we come back defensively. It's instinct for SOME women.Also you wanting to spend time with your mate is your choice. There are only SOME girls that would be annoyed by this. Not all women! And you know it can be guys that don't like it when girls want to spend time with their friends. My friends ex boyfriend hated it when she would hang out with people other than him. It was infuriating for her because she felt that she was loosing all her friends. It's not because he was insecure but because he just wanted to be with her. Unfortunatly this did end their relationship however, this doesn't relate to all women or all men, just some. And it doesn't have to be because of insecurity. "Don't you love me anymore" or whatever you wrote is again just some people. They might have gone through some tough times and just feel like that in general. It's not their fault it's just how they are. If you love them you'll put up with it and reasure them.8) What's wrong with wanting to be with the person you love? Sure sometimes it gets annoying but if you just explain to them you just want it to be you and your friends I'm sure that person will understand. It works both ways too. You need to make sure that you hang out with your girlfriend at least a few times a week, it's only fair really.9) It's not that we're impossible to please it's that sometimes we like to moan about something/anything especially if we're stressed. Might just have to deal with it. And if we don't like something we should tell you, right? "You don't tell us what you do and don't like" Well if we don't tell you then you don't know what to do next time, right? It goes either way, either you want us to tell you or you don't.10) Sure that can be annoying. I can give you that one BUT you have to talk to them and tell them that you feel uncomfortable with it all. Just don't give them a reason to look through your phone. Tell them you feel uncomfortable driving by her ex's. Expalin to her you're still in the 'getting to know you' stages and that you still want to get to know each other more before you make it official. Again, this is only SOME girls, not all. You need to stop generalizing women into these catagories.On the flip side nuts as in crazy (like a good crazy) like different to everyone else can be a good thing because life is never boring.Point is everything works both ways, both men and women have these imperfections and you can't generalize it into one catagory. To some people 'cool' might be something completely different to what you think is cool because everyone is different. 'Hot' to you might be different to what other people think of as 'hot'. Different people think different things. It's a fact of life, so you can't say '10 Reasons Why It's Her Fault' expecting everyone to agree with you. Because not everyone is you. I'm sure a woman could come up with 10 perfectly good (as in shallow, unjustifed and pathetic reasons)why it is always mens fault.And others who have commented are right, this is offensive to women globally no matter what country you're from. It's a generalization, meaning all.A relationship is a partnership. Meaning there is more than one person involved. If a relationship breaksdown it is the mans fault just as much as it is womens. It's not right to say one or the other either way. It's a 2 way street. That's inevitable.
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reader, rocknroll +, writes (6 June 2009):
Sounds like a little frustration going on here. As josephy stated, men are men and women are women, we can't transform ourselves into the other. Why? Because we don't hang out with each other like we have with our own sex, getting to know their likes and dislikes. We never really connect! This is a challenge of both sexes.
By the way, I don't care what side of the globe your from, the similarities among the individual sexes are identical, it is only the culture that "might" set you apart, but even that can be overcome.
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female
reader, josephy  +, writes (6 June 2009):
 women are women and men are men we can't be you and you can't be us live with it
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female
reader, happytobe +, writes (5 June 2009):
 Ginsengmeow:
Ignore him, honestly it's the majority of American men that are cocky and self absorbed like this one. Only seeing the wrong in everyone else, not themselves. They believe they're perfect. Not all, mind you. But QUITE a few.
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reader, xcharlottex +, writes (22 May 2009):
It's her fault the realtionship didnt work about because she's not hot enough?! Are you sure it's not because you're a shallow pig?! Us Women WERE NOT created to please you. So I personally think you should get the f over yourself. I s'pose you think you're God's gift to women?? I'd think again. I guess we know why you've been single for 3 years now ;)
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2009): First, the philosophy behind my previous comment can be applied universally, regardless of the type of women. It is applied universally towards individuals. In this case, you. Second, living and coming from Canada does not necessitate that I have only been intimate with women in Canada. I have had lovers from all around the globe, including women from the USA. In fact, my current intimate companion is from Illinois. She is indeed, very different than the women in your article.Furthermore, to say that American women in 'general' is what you have noted in your 'article', is very inaccurate, especially if you have a limited experience with American women in 'general'. When I say "limited experience", I mean less than 50% of the population of women in the USA - roughly less than 0.0000001% of the population more accurately put. Just as well, your pick of lovers is reflective of your own desires. You chose them, stayed with them and continued to stay with them even knowing what they demanded and reacted on. There is absolutely no excuse why you stayed with them, experiencing such 'misery'. This is about you and not about them. If you let others control what you want and who you are, then the blame obviously goes to you.
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reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (21 May 2009):
 Okay, I've come up with my own 10 reasons why it's HIS fault the relationship didn't work.
Reason number 1: It's your fault because I SAY SO.
Repeat for the following nine reasons.
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male
reader, Mr.Bisteeya +, writes (21 May 2009):
Mr.Bisteeya is verified as being by the original poster of the question GinsengMeow....I notice that you are from Canada...I like to say i do agree with its a "Battle" sometimes. But you being from Canada...you don't have a Clue how American women are these days. NO EXPERIENCE in that department buddy. Come visit LA,NY,Seattle,or San Fransisco...then provide your input buddy. I'll just say this article was meant for in reference to American women. Cool?
Kc 100....My relationship field is state side honey...Im not bitter...I am stating the FACTS her. Wholesome girls or well rounded girls are RARE here in the States. You gotta understand my Region...LOL...But I hear ya.
I actually don't have a problem dating or having a relationship....its the common BS that is always the same.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (21 May 2009):
An interesting read..."cough"
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2009): Coinciding the perspective of who's at fault, my philosophy towards intimate companionship is simple: it can only be the other person's fault, if I allowed it to happen. I have a friend who blames his girlfriend, his friends, his family, his work for almost everything that has happened to him negatively. From my point of view, most of the things that had happened to him could have been avoided if he didn't rely on others for his own happiness or for his own agendas.For me, my lover complements me. She does not complete me. If I have the mentality and necessity that she completes me, therefore having a reliance on her, I may put blame on her for what could have easily been avoided in the first place.To clarify, we choose our own battles. You could have either walked away when you felt the relationship was awry or stayed and let things happen. Since you stayed and let things happen, the blame goes back to you. She is what she is and you are what you are. To put blame on someone for who they are, is like blaming the tennis racket for letting the rebounded ball come back and hit you in the face.
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reader, k_c100 +, writes (21 May 2009):
 Can I safely assume you are either divorced or very much single?! You are very bitter towards women my friend, however it was very amusing to read and brightened my morning at work!
I liked all of your points except the last one - you cannot generalise that all women are nuts, clearly you must attract the nut jobs!
I feel as a woman I must defend myself to your little outburst, I understand you need a good old rant from time to time but your sweeping generalisations are not true for all women I assure you! Take me for example.....
I am 22, live in my own rented apartment. I have a job in a marketing company that I started after I finished university last year where I graduated with a great result. I have lots of outside interests other than work...I am actively involved in politics and campaign for my party frequently, I go to the gym and I go running regularly, I love to read, I love music and I love the cinema. One of my favourite things is to have a whole weekend where I spend it alone, with just a bottle of wine and my own company! I love football (soccer as you call it!) and support my home team where I go to watch games with my dad. I also love cars, foreign beers and ales. Whilst having these typically "male" interests, I am also fairly girly at the same time...I love nights out with my girlfriends, I love shopping, shoes, make-up etc. However the one thing I hate are chick flicks! Cannot stand the things, seem completely pointless to me!
So I think I have got a pretty good balance going on - I take care of myself and I am in no way a tomboy, but I can also just chill out and watch a game of football with a beer. I love my life and see no need for a man in it, but they do make a nice addition to my already great life. Not all women are needy psychopaths, there are a few out there like me!
I think you are right in a lot of things you say about women, I never understand how most women cannt bear to see their boyfriends looking at another woman or have to text them every 5 minutes to see what they are doing. Women are just very insecure creatures who get paranoid too easily. But I think you overlook the fact that some times men are to blame too....and the fact that men are just as insecure as women! Men have the whole "she is my woman and I must be the ultimate male" thing going on. Like an ex of mine, he would constantly ask if he was the best I'd ever had in bed. I made the mistake once of hesitating before I answered (because the truth was he was good but not the best!) and he never let it go! Men have such a huge ego and it is very easy to hurt your pride, and this stems from insecurities too!
So you are not totally blame-free in relationships, dont forget that! And try not to smear all women with the same brush, you wouldnt like it if all women went round thinking that men were cheating, lying, sneaky little b***ards now would you?!
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