He is the man of my dreams. Does an 8 year age gap matter?
Q. I have fallen in love with a man 8 years younger than me... I am 35 he is 27... Does this matter? I didn't know his age until very recently, I thought he was about my age, I thought he was 30/31. We've not yet had a sexual relationship but I do lov...
A. 10 June 2015: No problem at all- my girlfriend is nine years younger than me, we've been together for six months and its wonderful.... (read in full...)
How do I stop obsessing over my married ex who would like to have sex with me?
Q. Hi.I feel really embarrassed writing this but I feel like I need to vent and maybe get some advice. I used to be involved with this guy. I lost my virginity to him (he doesn't know) and ended up really falling for him. It never turned into a ...
A. 9 June 2015: You can stop obsessing by letting him go. That's the first thing to do. He has a wife and he hasn't behaved well to you- afteral he has no claim on your affection- nor to his wife who he has betrayed. I think you should stop seeing him, block them ... (read in full...)
If he truly loved me would he risk losing me while he's away?
Q. My on/off boyfriend and I have been through a lot the past 5 years. We are closer now than ever, support each other, have the same views etc. He is moving to NYC in a couple weeks, a long time dream of his. And I could not be happier for him, I w...
A. 9 June 2015: I can't answer about whether anyone ever leaves New York I've never been! However on your boyfriend, why would you think he would ever want to lose you given what you say about your relationship with him. I've had to move away from a girlfrien... (read in full...)
My boyfriend cheated in a past relationship! Should I leave him before he cheats on me?
Q. If my boyfriend cheated on his ex girlfriend (this was before he knew me or was dating me) would he also cheat on me? As far as I know (from what he has told me) he only cheated once. Do you think I should end our relationship now because he WILL ...
A. 9 June 2015: I think CMMP is right- you don't know what the context of his past relationship was, because we can never know how two other people work together. Infidelity is really complex- and often not about sex itself but about something else. Unless he has ... (read in full...)
He's destroyed my self esteem. How do I move on from being used, by my ex?
Q. Hi All, I have a problem. I'm 27 born in the uk my ethnicity is caribbean. My nigerian boyfriend of 2yrs have been pretending to be in a relationship with me the whole we were together. He has dumped me before in 2013 saying he cant give me the ...
A. 9 June 2015: I agree with the other posters. Don't feel angry with yourself- this is an experience you've had and its his fault that he is an idiot (incidentally you should feel very proud of being a midwife, its a brilliant and really important occupation). You ... (read in full...)
Should one rely on male friends for emotional support?
Q. Human beings are social animals. We all like to be appriciated, loved and to be in good company. Of all relationships marriage can be most rewarding as well most punishing. When one goes through emotional turmoils, it very natural to find solace i...
A. 9 June 2015: I don't agree with the previous posters. Of course there may be emotional and sexual confusion in friendship across the sexes but there can be in any friendship. The thing I'd concentrate on is the nature of the friend- are they trustworthy? will ... (read in full...)
How do I find a guy who's okay with casual dating but no sex?
Q. I'm 21, and due to a host of reasons (depression/SA etc.) I've never had a boyfriend, though my social life and career is OK again. Or even been on a date. I'm physically attractive so do get offers, but I still want to spend some time on my own ...
A. 9 June 2015: Two things- firstly don't get hung up on not having had sex. My girlfriend started going out with me when she was 25 and she had never had sex with anyone before and I don't care at all. Its something that doesn't even feature in the way that I ... (read in full...)
I need help leaving this married man. I just can't do it!
Q. I have been here many times before. I am the loser who is in love with a married man. I know I need to leave but I just can't find it in myself to do it. I know he doesn't love me. He told me. And he told me he will never love me. I have ...
A. 9 June 2015: I read your story with great sadness and though I think that the general tenor of what's written here is right, I don't think you should blame yourself too much for what's happened. I think you should concentrate on yourself. It doesn't seem lik... (read in full...)
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