A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:i have a crush on this guy that works at my local coffee shop and I'm pretty sure that he like me too. every time i go in, he would give me compliments and ask about my day. for example yesterday he gave me a hug and told me i smelled really good and gave me another hug after that and told me that i looked really pretty. he also gave me a free drink. every time i go in i think he is going to ask me for my number but he never does. i don't want to keep waiting for him to make the move. would it be too straight forward if i got his phone and put my number in it and tell him to take me on a date?
View related questions:
crush Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Barnes66  +, writes (18 March 2016):
 Are you sure he's single?I think there are rare exceptions to "if he's not asking you out then he's either not interested in dating you or not available". (especially if you are flirtatious/show interest). Could be he just likes the attention he gets from you, likes knowing he is desired but for whatever reason isn't interested in taking it any further - which is his prerogative.
However, if he's indeed single then I don't see why not. If he turns you down, you'll have an answer, but if he takes you up on it you'll have a better answer
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 March 2016):
 If you want him to have your number write it down on a piece of paper with your name, no need for you to "get" his phone.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2016): Get a pen write your number in a napkin or piece if paper and ask him to call u
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (17 March 2016):
 BTW, if he is actually interested in you, he will use whatever message you have on a t-shirt as a conversation starter. He just will. I've had guys come up to me to talk about my GLOVES of all things, just to have a conversation starter when they were interested in me. And, honestly, my gloves were NOT that fascinating.
If you try the t-shirt tip, and he doesn't comment on it, then I would take that as a sign he just likes to flirt, but isn't really that interested.
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (17 March 2016):
Too straight forward, and in my experience, it scares guys. Most guys are really afraid if girls! If you let them have control, or at least let them believe they have control, then they are much more relaxed. At least wait with being straight forward until you are left with no other options! Straight forward and being direct should be your very last choice when everything else has failed.
Here's what you do, you offer him the opportunity. You can ask him if he's on facebook. Add him there. Or, ask him what he likes to do after work, and then you "just happen" to like the same thing are are about to go do it yourself, which will give him the opportunity to ask if you should go together. You just got to give him some form of window to jump through, because guys tend to be looking for that window rather than going through the door (and by door, I mean simply ask, when its so obvious you will say yes).
A great window is t-shirts. If you have a t-shirt with some message on it, or characters from a videogame or something you enjoy, then that's a window every guy will jump through. Could be as simple as a dog on a t-shirt, if you like dogs. He WILL ask you about it and ask if you like dogs and you can tell him you do, or that you are volunteering for a shelter, or whatever you do. Then you can ask him to come along, because it's not a date-date that way, and he will still think he's in control and that it was all just coincidental. Yes, guys really do think that these things are coincidental and that they just got lucky....
Make your subtle moves first! Or else you risk scaring him off. I've given my number to guys too, just like in your case, and they NEVER called and never talked to me again. It scares them.
...............................
A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (17 March 2016):
 Well put it this way, you'll never know if you don't try right? The worst that will happen is that he will decline and things might be a little awkward but at least you'd know. I think most men would be flattered if a lady asks them out.
...............................
A
female
reader, miss frank  +, writes (17 March 2016):
Hello! I love this question! How lovely for you to ask us such a lovely question! Thank you!So I would advise to ask straight out if you are the type of girl who can then put it behind you when you see him each day if he says no....which hopefully he wont! But he may!If you what to play it a little cooler and see how the land lays, you may initially be better off next time he hugs you to reciprocate and whilst doing so say something like 'hey! Your girlfriend must be one happy girl with all your gorgeous hugs!' If hes interested in you he soon let you know there is no girlfriend...to which you can say 'no way! I'd snap you right up ! You should ask me out!' That way you save face if he isn't interested, as it could be considered a compliment if hes not interested and you can still have your coffee there! Or better still gives him the option to take it up.Let us know how it goes please!
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 March 2016):
 It must be a pretty relaxed place where he works, if his bosses do not mind that he hugs the customers :)...
Anyway, sure, go ahead , why not ? Yes, it IS very straightforward asking him out on a date, but, what's wrong with straightfoward ? You want something, you ask for it,- and since you are not asking him to do anything illegal or immoral or dangerous... ask away.
Remember though that asking is always allowed and responding is always optional. I.e.,it all depends how would you handle a possible rejection : coolly and graciously, or as if it is the end of your world.
This guy may not have asked you out yet because he is shy, because he thinks you are out of his league, because he thinks you may have a boyfriend , etc.etc.
Or , simply, he finds you attractive , but he is flirting without any intention to take it further. He may be a natural flirt with a live in girlfriend at home, he may be quite happy with his single,unencumbered status but of course flirting with a pretty customer helps a lot to kill time at a boring job.
In short : that he finds you very attractive, and nice -smelling too, ... does not necessarily means that he wants you as his girlfriend.
Then again, ...asking is the best, fastest way to know what's the deal with him . So , if you are not the type for long, patient waits,... might as well being proactive and find out what's up.
...............................
|
