A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I am thirteen and have been in a great relationship sence i was nine. With the same guy. I am completely ready for sex. no one can say its puppy love because it is not. not even close he means a lot to me and no one ever made me feel that good. and not in a sexual way he just makes me feel good. but he makes me feel better in a sexual way. we talked about it sence we were twelve and thought about it until. i know i might not be making the best desicion and that i may sound like a tramp but im fully ready and will use protection. i just need to know one thing. will it hurt really badly? 'cause i heard that it can realllllllyyyy hurt a girl her first time. i always had a high tolerance for pain but when i did research that pain seems inbarable. what should i do? and please no one tell me im not ready. because i am.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2010): I lost my virginity a year younger than you. I had not started my period yet but it did not hurt and it was nothing but pleasure. Start with oral or hand jobs first to loosen you up and be sure to use protection.
A
female
reader, lovexlikewinter7  +, writes (4 March 2010):
I'm only a few years older than you. 19. but i can tell you, you should wait. men generally do not respect women who give it up without much foresight outside of "will it hurt" - sex is life changing. i lost my virginity at 17 to a man i loved, and i regret it to date. i will be ashamed of how foolish the circumstances were when my children ask me in the future.
remember. it doesnt matter when a relationship started, they always change, and there are only two ends to every relationship. a wedding or a breakup.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010): One more vote to wait. I've also NEVER met any girl/woman who lost it at 13-14 and didn't regret it. The vast majority still regret losing it at 15. The odds of not regretting it don't even start to get decent until 16-17.
(Yes, I know almost EVERY girl does it earlier than I am recommending. Almost every girl regrets their choice a few years later too.)
I'm not trying to insult your relationship, but there just hasn't been enough time and physical & emotional development for you to be ready for this yet.
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A
male
reader, goodguy11 +, writes (1 March 2010):
To tell you the truth you might be ready in your mind but your body might not be. You're thirteen which means you are just starting to develop your body into a woman. And I don't think you're even ready to except the consequences for having sex at such a young age. Although sex might seem fun and easy to do, many things can go wrong. And I don't understand how you can say no one has ever made you feel the way your b/f makes you feel. You only been with one guy. Like everyone on this post has told you, wait a bit longer. Sixteen preferably but you're the one in control of your life. Be careful and hope you make the right decision for yourself.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010):
I am eight years older then you kiddo. I had sex when i was thirteen. I knew what i was doing, i knew the guy i was with, all good. It was horrible. Your body isn't finished growing, (i had only just gotten my period) and the ph balance (thats the chemicals inside your vagina) aren't at a point where you are ready to have sex. These chemicals protect against some of the bacteria that enters you during sex, but at your age isn't settled, and you can get infections from sex because of the in-balance. Urinary tract infections (bacteria that enters your bladder through sex) are horrible- its burns when you go to the toilet, gives you bad bladder pain (recurrent UTI's are the worst thing in the world, i wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy). Your period pain can get worse (i had an ambulance called for me twice, i was in so much pain) Yeast infections, thrush infections. Basically- you might think you're ready, but your body...it just isn't.
You'll make your own decision. Like me, you'll get the advice of all these adults (who have been there, and have lost their virginity, and have been thirteen, and know the difference between what they know now, and what they knew then) and ignore them to make up your own mind. But darling girl- if i could see my thirteen year old self, i would get on my knees and beg her not to to have sex- to wait until she was sixteen and her body could handle it. (i am still suffering from urinary tract infections.)
The pain of a first time can be bad, can be fine. At thirteen, you will be in pain, and will most likely have bleeding. Take care of yourself kiddo, the problems aren't worth it.
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female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (1 March 2010):
 Correction: I have NEVER met a girl who had sex at 13years old who did not regret sex when she got older. Most felt like a tramp in later years, especially when talking to friends (men and women) who had waited until 16,17,18 or even 21. Most girls I know, who had sex at this age, always found themselves lying about it and pretending to be virgins...
Your making a big, big mistake little girl.
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (1 March 2010):
You're not ready, otherwise you wouldn't be worrying. And your body hasn't finished going through puberty yet. You'll do more damage to yourself than good.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010): It didn't hurt me, but anyways i only had sex this year (at eighteen). Have you tried oral sex and fingering and hand jobs? If not do them first
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female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (1 March 2010):
Well you seem to know everything so shouldn't you know since he makes you feel better than anything sexually...which is something you've never had? Anyway, yes, it hurts. If you think that hurts, try passing a baby through there because that will really hurt if you aren't careful.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010): You say you're ready, but you're not, because yes, you are too young to be worrying about having sex at all. If you don't believe me then wait until you really screw up and have a baby, and how much pain you'll feel then, if you're scared of that type of pain. At your age, most every girl's body isn't even close to being developed enough inside, or for size, to be pregnant and have a baby. You'll either endure unbearable pain and ripping down there when you give birth, or they'll have to do a c-section, because the baby won't fit through, or the last option, the doctor will stubbornly make you keep pushing and ripping until the baby comes out and is handicapped or injured in one way or another. This is not to mention who's going to have to raise the child when you can't, even if you think you can. Whether you want to believe it or not, that has alot to do with having sex and the pain of your first time breaking the hymen. They go hand in hand, because if you're not ready to have a baby, then you're not ready to be doing that either. You may not like my answer, because I know you didn't come here to here something you don't want to do, but if you take it as help only, then you can understand that it is way too soon to be letting little boys do things like that to you. Trust me, like Miamine said, when you're older and these same boys are completely different towards you, you'll regret anything sexual you let them do to you, when you were as young as you are now. Maybe by knowing these things you can tell your friends the same thing when they are curious sexually and ask you stuff like that. It's really sad how wrongly influenced kids your age are, and maybe with a little knowledge you can save yourself from that path of doing things that are forbidden until adulthood. At least try to wait until you are 16 or 17, ..even then your parts inside will be more developed enough to at least have sex, without causing problems. Please do the right thing and respect yourself and your body, instead of just letting some boy use you at your age, when they've just reached puberty and should be only masterbating with themselves when they fantasize about under-developed girls at that age.
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female
reader, Miamine +, writes (1 March 2010):
Sigh.. you really aint ready, if you were you wouldn't be worrying so much about the pain. Your going to have sex no matter what we say, and you, like most girls your age, will look back and have many regrets.
Sex changes relationships a lot. At 13, you are no way near enough emotionally ready for sex. Very few girls who loose their virginities at 13 are very happy about it when they grow older.
If the guy is as young as you, it's unlikely that he'll know what he's doing and is more likely to hurt you. At 13, your body is still growing.. but it's your call... can't tell if it's going to hurt you, because I'm not you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010): Wayyyyyy too young. Believe me, there will be lots of time for sex
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010): You're not ready.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010): You seem to be justifying that you are ready to have sex to yourself in your post. But believe me, you arent, I cant really fathom that you have been in a relationship since you were nine. Nine, really? I thought boys had cooties at nine. You havent even finished going through puberty yet.
Take some time to grow up first. You're still a kid. You dont need to rush into these experiences that will be there for you the rest of your life.
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