A
female
age
30-35,
*ovehelp?
writes: So, I'm a 17 year old girl and I met this 25 year old guy online about a month and a half ago. We literally talked for 10 hours the first day we "met". He's really sweet and is always complimenting me. When it comes to conversation we make each other laugh and at times I feel as if I'm so lucky to have him in my life. Other times, I feel like we're wasting our time. He lives in Philadelphia and I in South Florida and as long as I'm living at home there's no chance of us meeting. Sometimes I feel like we're both in such different parts of our lives, yet we both feel so attatched to each other. He tells me how much he loves me, but I can't seem to muster the words to him. In my past experience, things always go sour with internet flings. He has a lot of baggae, as so do I, but I have this odd urge to want to fix him. Why is that? Why am I putting all my love ans strength into this if in the back of my head I have doubts of this working out between us?
View related questions:
living at home Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, lovehelp? +, writes (1 March 2010):
lovehelp? is verified as being by the original poster of the questionpinktopaz: I think you siad alot of the things I didn't want to tell myself. But it isn't that he's immature. He just ogt out of an 8 year relationship and was devistated by it. He just poured his heart out to me (people tend to do that to me alot for some reason), I didn't provoke it or anything. And now I feel if I back out with him I'll just be another stereotype, another heartless girl. As for me having baggage, I don't think my age is a factor. Different things happen to people at all different ages, and sometimes hardships are more sped up for people. But thanks for your help.Soon567: By baggages, I mean that we both have been hurt alot in the past whether it's been in relationships or by our family. We get it each other in that sense. We are NOT sexting or cybering or anything of that nature and he does NOT have kids, so those aren't factors. And technically, the wait for me would only be till October of this year until I'm an adult. But I think you might be on to something with the idea that he's hindering me. I never thought about it that way.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (1 March 2010):
Seriously, what baggage could you possibly have at 17 years old? I'm 26 and thinking of a 25 year old guy trying to get with a 17 year old girl makes me think that there's something wrong with him. He's 25 with a lot of baggage and there's probably no mature woman his age that wants to deal with his crap, so he's turning to you because you're naive and want to help fix his issues. I don't mean this in a bad way, we've all been young and didn't know any better. And yes, there are some women that are older and would want to "fix" him too, but personally, I think that he likes the fact that it's easier for him to get acceptance from you than someone older.
Anyhow, given the circumstances, in reality things probably won't work out between you two. And sometimes that's for the best. A lot of people find it easier to play themselves off as someone they're not when they're not face-to-face. We have a lot of anxieties and stresses in our own lives, don't worry about some guy that should have his crap together. He's an adult and should be able to fix himself, whether or not he chooses to is his own decision. But you have stuff going on in your life and you'll encouter a lot more as you grow up. Just relax and consider easing up on this relationship you have with him because you'll just be setting yourself up for even more baggage.
...............................
|