A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I just had a new boyfriend ane he want me to have sex with him to prove that i love him,i told him that i am a virgin but i am not,i dont want to lose him,what can i do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (2 June 2013):
 Yeah the first time I heard that line it was more like "Wouldst thou fair maiden show thou truest heart and soul to all yon kingdom by a romp with me in yon meadow?"
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2013): "what can i do?"Realize that a horny teenage guy will say ANYTHING to a naïve, gullible, needy, insecure teenage girl to get into her pants.As Sageoldguy1465 points out, "If you love me then you'll put out for me" is one of the oldest, flimsiest lines in the book, yet girls still fall for it.Guys can't disrespect girls who respect themselves. Don't sell yourself so cheaply, if you do then you'll regret it for the rest of your life, especially if you end up dumped.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2013): no don't sleep with him. A guy who disrespects your choices and wants you to "prove your love" by sleeping with him, is not a good person to be with. He is selfish and only thinking about what he wants. It is better to lose him then to give in because once you give in, it is only the beginning. He will then keep insisting throughout the relationship that you continue to "prove your love" (i.e. sleep with him) without regard to how you feel, since he's already doing it now!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2013): If he cared for you he wouldnt pressure you for sex. He would wait until yot were ready. Ditch this chump cos he isnt worth losing sleep over in any kind of way, if you catch my drift.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2013): This guy is giving you a cheesy approach to having sex. It sounds like a one liner from a cheap porn movie. You don't have to prove anything to him or let him jump your bones. What the hell here? Don't let anybody use emotional black-mail on you to have sex. That is bullshit. You have sex when you are ready and not a moment before. If cannot wait till him to hit the road. Your not giving away free samples. if he goes good. Let sex come when you are emotionally ready for it. There are lots of other boys who would want to be a boyfriend not just a sex machine. Move forward. Good-luck.
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A
female
reader, Tantivy  +, writes (1 June 2013):
Dump him. He's clearly only interested in sleeping with you. You never need to have sex with someone to "prove" that you love them. Being a caring, kind and nice person is good enough which I'm sure you are.
Kudos to you for spotting this! Remember, there are a lot of guys out there who'll do anything to get you to sleep with them. The best way to ensure commitment is often not to sleep with them for a while - it's not "playing games," it's testing how much they really like you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2013): If he truly loves you and cares about you, he will wait until you're ready.
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A
male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (1 June 2013):
 This man is not worthy of your love. There is a much better guy out there for you who will treat you with far more respect than this man will.
If you decide he's worth staying with, that's fine. The choice is entirely yours in that respect. However, this does not mean that you must give in to him. If you don't want to sleep with him, then don't. Respect your feelings. It doesn't appear that he does. What happens the next time he wants/doesn't want something from you? Will he threaten to walk away again? Will he continue to do this for the rest of your relationship? It isn't acceptable. If he's a decent guy, he will stay with you. If he doesn't, then he is not worth a minute of your time, and frankly, you will have dodged a bullet.
It's looking pretty unanimous, here. I hope you will take the advice you have received here, because we all appear to be in agreement. Good luck, and I'm certain whatever happens will be for the best, but never allow yourself to become a doormat.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (1 June 2013):
 Breaking up with him would be the smartest thing you have ever done to date. No genuine guy ever suggests that having sex with him will "prove" your love.
Instead, if you allow him to have sex with you it will just be the green light for him to then move on to another girl soon afterwards.
Sex does not keep a man. Sex is a diversion and Sexercise for the players. It does not mean a long term relationship to a player. Giving him sex is likely to impact negatively on you.
There are millions of gorgeous men out there.
One really gorgeous man is alleged to have been banished from Saudi Arabia as he is reputed to be too good looking:) You be the judge.
Google the following: Omar Borkan Al Gala
There you will see pictures of this gorgeous man.
Then there are millions more men who are out there and worth feasting your eyes on. Here is a list of 65 of those men listed to be especially gorgeous.
http://www.imdb.com/list/y1oyD9vUVvU/
But there is NO HURRY.
At 16 to 17 your studies should come first.
And later, after your studies have been completed then finding employment should be a priority.
If a guy is not willing to date you first, without sex, then he is NOT a gentleman. And not worthy of your consideration.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 June 2013):
 Tell him that HE needs to prove HIS love to you, by waiting for sex until you are ready on your own, without his pressures. For as long as it takes. If he bolts and you end up losing him- then you know for sure that he did not care about you, but only about getting laid quickly.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (1 June 2013):
 P.P.S. "Losing him" sounds like the better deal, here!!!!!
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (1 June 2013):
That old "...prove that you love me by putting out for me..." line is SO threadbare, dog-eared and worn out that only the youngest, and most naive, women are ever falling for it, any more....
YOU sound like you've "caught on" to it, as well. NOW, stick to your guns and tell this creep, "Geesh, (his name here), if putting out is the only way a girl can exhibit love, HOW CAN I EVER SHOW MY DOG THAT I LOVE HIM???????"
P.S. It hasn't worked for me since sometime back in the mid-70s!!!!!
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2013): If you have to have sex before you are ready to prove your love, then it's not love. No boy should ever pressure you into having sex and even more unacceptable is a boy who says you need to do it to prove your love for him (oldest line in the book).
Do NOT do anything until you are ready, no matter what he says. And when you think you are, the two of you need to talk about what kind of birth control method you will be using, and have a back up. I hope it's not for a while because you are dealing with a very immature boyfriend who is only thinking with his penis. If he is old enough to have sex, then he is old enough to do the right thing. If he leaves you over this, he was not the right boy for you, and he did you a huge favor in the long run.
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