A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:When me and my boyfriend have sex he tries so hard to make me orgasm, it feels so good and I want to be able to Orgasm so bad but I dont know why I cant? Is it the fact I'm afraid we'll have to clean up my mess? Whats wrong? I know alot of girls cant orgasm but I DONT want to be one of those girls. Another question. Why do guys think its so hott to make a girl have an orgasm anyways?
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female
reader, chole1111  +, writes (7 December 2009):
Its seems like most of these comments are coming from males readers, which is a shame since I would find it quite hard to provide tips for a man to organism.Well I think there are a few issues here, which can be extracted from your post1) Sex should never feel like he is trying so hard2) You should not be consumed with the trying to have a organism3) Cleaning should be the last thing on your mindI have never had an issue having an organism but I think it cause I really know my body. I think for the most part females who cannot organism are not exploring enough what or what doesnt work for them.Can you when you help yourself? Sometimes believe it or not its the guys we are with that are not sexually right for us that stand in the way of climaxing.Anyway there are 3 different kinds of organisms1) outside -which can be achieved through rubbing2) inside- gspot (harder to get than above)3) combination of both (hardest and will probably led to what one reader makes ref. to as squirting cause if you can achieve this you will probably have multiple organisms and the bed will be soaked.My tips for you to achieve an organism would be the following:1)watch porn and figure out what you like and dont like from this videos, recreate it2)master the art of having an organism from touching yourself. if you cant make yourself get off how is someone else suppose to?3) have your bf touch you while having sex, but make sure his hands are clean you dont want a urinary infection.4) lay on your stomach and have him come from behind and have his hand put pressure on your pelvic region (bit lower and in between your ovaries)5) Remember as a female sex gets better with age I just celebrated my 25th a few months ago and it has really increased my libito and my body actually went from wanting sex to needing it.6) if you are on any medication such as anti depressants or birth control ect which a lot of people tend to be on these days it is not affecting your libito if it is try a different brand by consulting your doctor.7) Aww latest you may be suffering from something I call the boyfriend bedroom blues in that being in a relationship sex is not one of those things you have to chase its there for you all the time-this is unsexy to me as well as others wether they realize it or not. My suggestion is play a little game. Try not having sex for a week this includes oral well as long he or you do not cum. By the end of this week you will need sex so terribly or when you body feels it needs it then from the excitment of it all you will forget about all the pressures of cleaning, organisms and will focus on the important bits of just having sex cause thats sexy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe vibrator sounds fantasic. I'm going out to buy one tomorrow thanks guys.
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A
male
reader, leonard j. Douglas  +, writes (9 February 2008):
You said that you never have an orgasm,if I am correct. It has been stated that only one woman out of three can have an orgasm by vaginal-intercourse,guess you are one of the other two who can't have an orgasm with intercourse. Here is the reason. The female clitoris which is located at the upper junction of your vagina,where your two vaginal lips come together,it must have direct penile stimulation for a woman to have an orgasm. Being as his penis is stroking your vagins much lower down, with intercourse, there is no direct clitoral-stimulation taking place,and in your case you won't have an orgasm. WhatI would sugest is that you learn to have orgasms with Masturbation,using your fingers,or even a vibrator on you clitoris can help you to learn how to have orgasms,then once you have trained yourself to have orgasms, you can show him how to bring you to an orgasm. Then once that you have taught yourself how to come,you can also use your fingers to give him a helping hand while his penis is stroking your vagina, your fingers are stimulating your clitoris at the same time. And as you now have taught yourself to have orgasms by manual stimulation, Masturbation, A stroking penis and your fingers will do the trick. One thing that he needs to keep in mind,lots of "Foreplay",touching, hugging and kissing is a must,not just jumpping your bones right-off if he want's you to have an orgasm and you both enjoy your love-making.
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A
female
reader, korculan queen  +, writes (9 February 2008):
Guys think it is hot for a woman to have an orgasm with them because it confirms their ability in pleasing women. Simple as.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (8 February 2008):
 No dear, it is not usual to "squirt" and I can't imagine where you got that idea. Some women do, but out of (I'll just say) dozens of ladies I've been with over some 45 years, only two ever did that. So relax and enjoy yourself, the odds that you will are slim indeed. It is true, however, that most all women do release a very small amount of female semen which perhaps most men, and even some of the women, are unaware. It more or less just gets mixed up with all the wetness and male ejaculate and lubricant that is generated. For those who would like to know, this little bit of female semen is excreted by a couple of different glands in the female anatomy, ahem, and tastes great to me. Best wishes.
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A
male
reader, Asexy +, writes (8 February 2008):
 Women don't usually "squirt" during orgasm. Very rarely, they do, but it's not the norm.
These might help...
A URL about what happens to a woman's body during orgasm:
http://www.whitelotuseast.com/FemaleOrgasm.htm
A URL about the Myths & Facts of a female orgasm:
http://www.sogc.org/health/health-myths_e.asp
Here's a URL about why a woman might have problems with it: http://web4health.info/en/answers/sex-orgasm-cause-f.htm
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A
male
reader, Moviefan +, writes (8 February 2008):
 We like it because it can be a pride thing, and we like to make you feel as good as we are when we peak. But never lie about having an orgasm does more damage then it does good. But it really sounds like you are to worried about making a mess and getting to an orgasim. Just stop thinking about anything that can cause dought and stress. These can cause a lot of problems during sex. And yeah not all girls squirt. Kind of like how some guys have more force when they cum. So dont worry about it and enjoy it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've never reached orgasms... But isnt it normal to 'squirt' when having one? What are the common outcomes other then squirting?
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (8 February 2008):
You indicate that you "squirt" when you orgasm . . . or do you just think that you will? Have you ever done that or even reached orgasm? It is fairly rare, but even if you ARE a squirter, I would think that your pleasure should have priority over cleaning up afterwards. There are plastic sheets, you know.
And it is perfectly natural for your boyfriend to want to please you completely. Most normal heterosexual men, if not selfish, would like to please and believe we are good at doing that for our woman, or as Asexy said, at least think that we are.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHmm... any pointers on how to orgasm? I dont really like using my fingers.. Its boring.. OMG ya its such a turn on when i get him to ease or squirm in the nicest way. Such a turn on! but all the stuff that comes out when the orgasm comes and it can be so much like 2L. Its amazing how big it can really be. I've never had an orgasm by myself but I can never get myself that excited to do so. It makes me sad lol
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A
male
reader, Asexy +, writes (8 February 2008):
We like it because it's a pride thing. We're THAT good that we can make you that excited. Reaffirms that we're great in bed, like we think we are, lol.
And don't you feel the same thing when you're going down on your bf? You have the ability to make him squirm in the NICEST way. Don't you feel great when you achieve that? How would you feel if he didn't orgasm. Wouldn't you feel like you hadn't done a good job?
As for not orgasming, can you have one by yourself? If so, you need to be able to communicate with him well enough DURING sex that you can tell him exactly what to do. A guy who doesn't want to take direction in bed isn't worth having sex with. (Well, as long as you are saying something hot like "oooh, over to the left!" rather than something derogatory like: "you suck! it's to the left!" grin.
If you haven't had one by yourself yet, that's where to start. Have fun.
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