A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have always wondered this. After hearing many pepperoni nipples and bologna nipple jokes and comments, it's easy to figure out that men are not fond of large areolae. Why is it exactly?Is it because smaller ones are more sensitive? Because small ones are more feminine? Can it just not be explained?I hope to get an areolae reduction (mine are 2 inches) in the upcoming months. scarring will not alter my decision or stop me and if i do end up with a lot of scarring I may keep my bra on during sex. are scars a turnoff?
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah, I'll continue with the surgery.
Good luck to you all.
Goodbye.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 November 2011):
 "But he'd still love me regardless of scars...so I can still go through with it & if he can't accept me for me then he isn't the one."
OP, this is a cover. Clearly it's NOT about what any given MAN wants. This is clearly about what YOU want and NEED emotionally and mentally. And that's FINE IF YOU CAN OWN UP TO WHY YOU FEEL THE NEED TO MUTILATE your body. And yes I use the term mutilate. Because your vision is skewed and I really feel you should work this body image issue through with a therapist. If you were posting here that you thought that cutting daisies into your skin around your moles to make them more attractive was appropriate do you think we’d support that? Body mutilation is an accepted practice in some cultures. We do it with tattoos and piercings… Some teens are cutters. Some just cut to soothe their psychic pain not caring if it’s artistic or not. SOME (my BFF’s daughter at your age btw) was self-mutilating by doing just what I said above…she CUT her body around moles to carve petals into her skin… she has permanent scars now from these things, along with large holes in her ears from oversized piercings
EVERYONE here has said that scars are worse than natural breasts (which in MOST cases I will agree)
I actually thought of YOU last night when I took my bra off. After a day of being "fluffed" in my cotton NON-underwire bra my lovely shaped tiny areolaed breasts had the most ugly misshapen puckered areolas I've seen in a long time. NOT round. NOT even oblong.... NOT attractive. Again I HAD to have this surgery. It was pure reconstruction not cosmetic. I still work with a therapist on body image on a monthly basis.
What you are seeking is cosmetic. And IF you go through therapy and STILL want and NEED this surgery for your own peace of mind then I can more accept it. It’s akin to those folks who have to have a limb amputated due to the belief that they will be happier without the limb. I’ve seen shows on this. There is no dissuading them that the perfectly healthy leg should stay. One guy soaked his leg in dry ice till the foot died and the doctors who had refused to do the surgery had NO CHOICE but to amputate. He got his wish. Here are some articles about healthy limb amputation. NOTE they are in the psychology area of articles NOT MEDICAL. The disorder is called BIID (Body Integrity Identity Disorder)
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/03/22/health/psychology/22ampu.html
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,520811,00.html
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12448590
I can see clearly that NOTHING any of us say to you will help. I think we need to let this issue go. But I would strongly encourage you to do some deep psychological work to determine WHY you feel the need to do this and come to terms with WHY you are doing WHAT you are doing. I’m not asking you to go to therapy to have someone convince you NOT to do it as I can see that is FUTILE. I am asking you to seek therapy so you can LEARN more about WHY you feel the way you do. Education and Knowledge are the ultimate power.
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (2 November 2011):
 I agree, your reasoning is off.
You were the one who said you didn't want to wait until you were in your 30'ties with finding a man who actually cares for you enough to see your breasts in their natural shape, you're the one who didn't want to wait that long. And then you are told you have a far better shot and finding a man who loves you for exactly what you look like as you currently are, then if you scar yourself and ruin your body.
Sure, if you WANT to test the guys then you can also shave off your hair to weed out the ones who doesn't truly love you for you... But that's going against the entire reason why you said you wanted surgery done!
And to anyone else who wondered, if I got this correctly, no one has yet seen your breasts. You are just guessing at everything. No one has ever commented on your breasts.
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reader, CindyCares  +, writes (2 November 2011):
 OP, yes, a man who really loves you would love you with scars too. But obviously if he really loves you he also would love you just as you are now, with your real areolas !
What kind of reasoning is yours, OP ? A man that really loves you would love you even if you had a peg leg , are you going to cut your leg off to let him prove you " he's the one " ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut he'd still love me regardless of scars...so I can still go through with it & if he can't accept me for me then he isn't the one.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2011):
I am a man. I think ones that are too small look kinda funny, but they are all good. Just be glad with what you have. Do not undertake a risky elective surgery for that. Have any men had a chance to comment on them yet or are these remarks coming from other (catty) women?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (1 November 2011):
"But if a guy loves me, he'd had to love me even if I have scars..."
or larger areoleas!
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (1 November 2011):
No, the cup size changes with the band. Google for a converter and you'll see.
Yeah, sure a guy would love you no matter what if he actually truly deeply loves you, but then again that ruins the entire point of why you want to have the surgery done. A woman is more beautiful to a man in her natural shape. Plus like I said, the scars might be a red flag for a man.
And I imagine.. when you meet a man who truly loves you he'll wish you never had the surgery so he could have seen you in your natural shape. He might feel like he's missed out on the real you.
Sure you can also have surgery on your face and look like a mess, a man who truly loves you will still love you.. but'll be despite of your scars, and not for your scars, while your natural breasts would be a bonus to him. Scarred breasts would be something he'd love you despite of, and not look to as something positive. So it sort of ruins your point.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionChigirl, if you're a 32C then that would just mean your band is smaller, so same size of the actual boob, you're probably just thinner or are smaller in frame.
I believe, i could be wrong.
But if a guy loves me, he'd had to love me even if I have scars...
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (1 November 2011):
I have scars. I asked 38 yr old boyfriend last night for you and his comment was SCARS are worse than anything.
so there you go.. the scars will be a bigger turn off than the pancake areola.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (1 November 2011):
Oh actually, wait.. I converted the bra size wrong, I'm a 32C, so mine are way smaller than yours. Which makes me think your areolae must be even smaller than mine in proportion to the breasts.. If I converted this correctly, I'm 70D in European size, and your is 80D in European size if I am right. Which is like twice as much boob as me, yet you still have the same areola size as me. I've had other girls be jealous of my areola size... Doesn't make much sense if you believe they are ugly. People who have seen my breasts admire them, and I'm not shy about them so plenty of women have seen them. Oh and I've had some 20-30 guys in my life time see my breasts as well. I've never heard anything but positive feedback. And one boob is smaller than the other too. In fact, several have said my breasts are perfect. Just what they've always looked for when they are searching online for breasts to jerk off too.. even though that's not a tactful thing to say. It's still true. A man would absolutely love your breasts, no doubt about it. And when you find a man who loves you, and you've had a surgery, he'll wish you had not had it so he could have seen you in your natural beauty. You've got perfect breasts and if you really doubt that you could take a picture of them and give to guys online and hear what they think, I think you'll find out they are amazing. But just the breasts that is, don't take a picture where your face shows too, you don't want to have images of you fluctuating around so anyone can recognize you.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (1 November 2011):
You have the exact same breasts as me then. I'm also around that size, and my areolae is that size too.
I've NEVER gotten a complaint, nor have I ever been a turn off, and men absolutely love my breasts. I asked my lover last night and told him about your question and he thinks it is silly, then sucked on my nipples and I think that said it all.
You're about to ruin something perfect.
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reader, vixbear  +, writes (1 November 2011):
I don't think it really matters.
this could be the same with any thing.
big or small guys?
big or small penis?
big small women?
i wouldn't take the critics to personal
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reader, Battista +, writes (31 October 2011):
OP I haven't read through all these comments but just wanted to know: have you ever had feedback on your breasts from a real-life guy, or are these negative opinions of large areolae solely ones you have got from internet forums?
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reader, Beingblack +, writes (31 October 2011):
 I am (without sounding too big-headed), a mans man. I am big, black, bald and tough. I do exactly what it says on the tin. I have watched this question with a huge amount of interest, and outlined your thoughts to some of my friends over the weekend.
My point of view is that I do not care what size nipples, or areola a girl has. My personal point of view is that if I saw scarring, I would be completely turned off. Not by the scars, but by the need to have surgery. I like natural looks, and natural feel.
I once dated a woman who had gone through a double mastectomy. She had perfectly shaped, 34D breasts made of silicone and skin from parts of her bum (butt) and I could not tell that they were 'fake'. The thing is, she had no feelings whatsoever in her breasts. That was a massive turn off.
My friends were generally of the same opinion as me. The size of a womans areola is not important at all, just the size and shape of the breasts themselves!!
I fully understand what you are dealing with, I have a sister who was told that her boobs were too small, and teased at school with 'fried eggs' and 'cucumber pips tits'. She grew up, fixated on enlargement surgery, and scared to death to let her boyfriends see her bra-less. Unlike you, our family could not afford to spend money on surgery. Luckily for her, she is now in her fifties, a susperstar London prosecutor, and is exceedingly comfortable with the same breasts. Where are all those idiot boys who teased her, and made her so insecure? Wishing they could date her probably.
The point of all these answers is very similar. You are so very young, you have been mentally scarred by an idiot or two. You have projected all of your problems and negativity onto the relative size of your areola, and they have done nothing wrong to you. These people who made comments, have they even SEEN your breasts? How many nipples/areola have you seen yourself, in order to make comparisons? The physical scars WILL be a turn-off, I don't care what anyone says.
Imagine for a moment that you saw surgery scars on your boyfriends penis. There you go. What sort of man has surgery on his privates? A very insecure one!!
Flip it. Think about it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut the point of my question was to get male perspectives on whether scars are a turnoff. They say guys should accept you as is, so be it big areolae or surgery scars they should accept me how I am right? So I don't understand the anti surgery sentiment here.
It's a personal choice and decision that I would make for myself and my body.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou know what?
I can honestly say that sometimes I stand in the mirror, nude of course and I like my areolae. The thing I like most is the shape. I mean, I don't mean to offend anyone or come across as egotistical, but mine are perfectly round and have always been. I like that much and I've google imaged areolae reduction and the results always come out a little...freaky but I guess it looks freaky when you put it up against a before pic. But I still feel they are out of proportion and if they were small, I don't think it would be an issue because small areolae are never criticized. If you google pepperoni nipples or bologna nipples or salami nipples or pancake nipples, things will pop up. You'll get questions or definitions or whatever.
But I have asked on other forums, about big areolae and guys always talk negatively about them. I'm not sure if we're allowed to mention forum names but I've asked on multiple forums and many guys always talk about their dislike or hate for big areolae. They talk about how much of a bummer or turnoff it is. That's what scares me and puts me off. I don't want to be a complete turnoff to my partner or for my partner to hate them just as much as I always have.
I've felt this way since I was little and my breasts began developing. I felt the areolae were out of proportion. Too big. The only time I can deal with them is when it gets cold and they shrink or when I'm sexually aroused & they shrink. Even then I'm still not fond of their appearance.
I can't have children so the breastfeeding isn't an option, although adoption is and even then I want to adopt teenagers because too many people go into adoption expecting and only wanting a baby. But that's a different issue.
My weight has been fluctuating as of late so now I'ma 36C, formerly a 34D & I'll probably be end up at a B, which i'm fine with.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (31 October 2011):
You said we didn't answer your question. Ok, lets have a recap. 1. "I have always wondered this. After hearing many pepperoni nipples and bologna nipple jokes and comments, it's easy to figure out that men are not fond of large areolae. Why is it exactly?"Unanimous reply is: no one has heard these jokes, guys don't care, you have misunderstood these jokes at worst, because even if a man jokes about something doesn't mean he thinks negatively of it. Men love a large areolae just as much as a small one. So your final answer is that your hypothesis is wrong. Jokes you have heard about nipples does not reflect what guys really feel about nipples. 2. I hope to get an areolae reduction (mine are 2 inches) in the upcoming months. scarring will not alter my decision or stop me and if i do end up with a lot of scarring I may keep my bra on during sex. are scars a turnoff?Answers you've gotten are: YES. Scars will be a turn off. It'll be a far bigger turn off than your areolae size. Scars are ugly and uncomfortable. Men wont like them.3. A conclusion you've made: The areolae are out of proportion. mine are 2 inches. Answer: What is your bra size? What makes this size out of proportion? It is not unnatural or abnormal, it's a very average size. Your areolae is not large by any definition. What do you define as a "small" areolae, because my definition would be your size (and mine as well). I know, because I've seen large areoles, and ours don't even come close. 4. This is something that makes ME insecure. Answer: You are doing this because everything anyone tells you makes you feel insecure about it. You want to come off as attractive to men, and by doing so you make yourself less attractive to men in many other areas. Such a level of insecurity that you show, and that your scars will be forever a proof of, is a red flag for a man. In addition, if a man wants to create a family you are one of the women he wouldn't be interested in, because your horrible body image is not something he'd want his children to grow up with. Regardless of your ability to breast feed or not. Now, we've just answered your question. Yes, scarring is ugly (unless it was a necessary surgery). No, men don't prefer smaller areoles. You should get a real life man to actually take a look at your breasts and tell you what he thinks (a man who loves you that is, not a surgeon who will say anything just so you will give him money), because you are basing this on hypothesis alone.
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reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (31 October 2011):
To the OP... if the point of the question was not to help you improve your body image and point out the insanity of an unnecessary surgery what was the point?
truly?
I mean we WANT to help you (and yes folks talk about this off the board too...)
I stress so much over young women and their body image.
I was thin as a young woman
I gained tremendous weight as a young mother and wife
Finally I had gastric bypass and lost more than I currently weigh.... I had no choice but to have massive amounts of excess skin removed. I still have massive amounts to have removed.... over five more pounds of just skin which volume wise works out to 2 sizes! (at least it did last time)
I had no choice but to have a lift... and I look now at my mishappen areola with the puckered and pulled stitches... and the scars itch and hurt unbelievable even with 2 or 3 times a day of heavy doctor prescribed lotions.
Did you know that you can't wear underwire bras after breast surgery.... good luck finding cute non-underwire bras... 3 months after surgery I have permission from my surgeon for wired bras FOR A FEW HOURS ON DATE NIGHT ONLY... they do not want wires pushing on the scars...
I have a serious question for you....
what do you think this surgery will fix?
it won't fix the self-loathing you feel that you center on your perfectly normal breasts... so once your breasts are "fixed" will you move on to hating another part of your body?
will you be going to therapy for your self-hatred of your body? do you think that it might even be a good idea to have therapy before you have the surgery?
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reader, chigirl +, writes (31 October 2011):
Wow, it's just 5 cm? That's the same size as me. Men love my breasts... sheezes. I love my breasts and my nipples too, and I've seen plenty of women with larger nipples!
OP your areolae IS NOT LARGE. Pancakes? You're not even close, you've got what I have always thought of as normal small nipples.... Not too tiny and not too big.
This is real sad, I think my areolae size is beautiful and here you go and practically tell me it's so ugly I should consider surgery. Well I for one won't ever go under the knife as I love the way I am naturally... and I swear to you men LOVE my breasts and areolae. In fact some have, although it is far from classy, told me my breasts as perfect and just what they've always wanted and better than others....
There's no way a legit professional would perform this surgery on you. No way. Because your areolae is normal and far from large. Have you ever seen another woman naked since you think this is big?
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reader, CindyCares +, writes (31 October 2011):
IF you can convince the surgeon, remember, OP, IF.
The average diameter of a female areola is around 3.5 cm, but it can go up to 10 cm and it's still considered absolutely normal. Yours are 2 inches = 5 cm, so...
Anyway, suit yourself, the money is yours, the nipples too. If you like "sliced pancakes " better than " pancakes " only, by all means go get them.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAnyways, I WILL be going through with the surgery. The point of this question wasn't to convince me to get surgery or not.
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reader, CindyCares +, writes (30 October 2011):
I just thought something and I feel shortchanged. I protest formally.
If men, according to you, comment disparagingly about large areolae, or " pancake nipples "... this must also mean they comment favourably about small areolae ,right ?
Well, I have small areolae and I have never been complimented for, uhm, what, " rosebud " nipples ?.
I thought that men did not particularly care or notice one way or the other, but, since you are adamant they do care ... I protest, which office do I go to claim my due compliments ?
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reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 October 2011):
I get hating your body or parts of it.. I do. BTDT.
I get being excited to be able to afford to change something you hate...
What I don't get is how maybe ONE stupid boy said something ignorant and you adopted it as your anthem.
I asked my younger boyfriend about this.. he had never heard the term pepperoni nipple or bologna nipple or any of those things.
I agree that you are entitled to your feelings. but that's what they are YOUR feelings... and you should have the surgery if you really want it... AFTER you do some psychological work with a good body image therapist. (IF YOU CAN AFFORD THE SURGERY YOU CAN AFFORD THE THERAPY)
IF you are so sure you won't be swayed by a therapist then there is nothing to fear to prove to yourself that you are right....
I liken a surgeon willing to do this surgery on a not mature breast on a woman who admits to gaining and losing weight regularly (being at a stable weight is critical for PS to work) with a surgeon willing to sterilize a 21 yr old who has not had children but swears she won't ever want any... irresponsible.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (30 October 2011):
Guys aren't one dimensional. You really should get a boyfriend first before you say that no man will ever be attracted to your breasts. You're killing the mood yourself by creating all this fuzz. So you want attention from these "popular" guys. And you asked about ONE criteria only, the areolae. And they also answered that that's not a deal breaker.
But here's the thing, just because this ONE guy you've talked to doesnt like a big areolae (again I really doubt that he'd actually care to say such a thing had he ever had a real relationship in his life), but he can't speak for other men.
How many times must I tell you before you believe me, for instance? You are the only one who's heard these comments, no one else has. That alone proves that most guys, world wide, don't care!
You're basing so much on these persons that you judge to be "popular" and perhaps you're feeling inadequate since you aren't as popular? Or you want guys to drop dead for you and think that if you change your nipple size they will, despite you not flashing your breasts around?
I still don't see how this makes any sense. You don't have to wait until you are 30 to have either a sex life, or a man who thinks your breasts and areolae are just fine. Or adores them even, but you got to face it, some men are butt-men and some are boob-men, and my last boyfriend was a hand-man who adored my hands above everything else on my body. That'll happen. But it doesn't mean theres anything wrong about you. You also need PERSPECTIVE. A man's farts aren't attractive, but men fart and we love them anyway, because people come as a whole package, not a pick and choose deal. Men know this too about women. Lots of men for example don't like feet, yet they date women who have them... they wouldn't go down and kiss your feet, but it's certainly not a deal breaker. These guys you talked to could just as easily have said they dislike big feet on a woman, and what would you do if you had big feet? Go to surgery? Or think that these guys can go screw themselves because you are what you are and you need a man who can actually handle it?
Women have big feet. It's not always attractive in itself, but hey, people have them, and they are in relationships. Men have man-boobs, and they are in relationships. Women can be twice as tall as their man, yet they are in a relationship. Bald men are in relationships. Fat women are in relationships. Perspective... that's what you need. Appearance isn't, for most part, a deal breaker, AND what's even better is that the thing you complain about is certainly not something universally thought of as a negative. It's just something these guys you hang out with say. But meet a real man, a real boyfriend, and not just guys on the corner, and he'll tell you a different story.
Oh, and one of my breasts are bigger than the other, yet men think my breasts are beautiful... Don't see how that matches what this popular man said.
How about you treat yourself as ABOVE such comments, rather than below? Instead of thinking "this man wants small nipples, so I need small nipples, no matter what any future boyfriend actually thinks", how about you turn it around and say "this man who wants small nipples is not for me, I want a man who accepts me just as I am and who does not trash women in public nor disrespect them because of their body, because that's below me".
He might be as popular as ever, but he's still being rude. He wouldn't like it if you started cracking jokes about his penis.
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reader, CindyCares +, writes (30 October 2011):
You are asking yourself the wrong question " why should I live with areolas that makes me feel so insecure ". The real question is " why should I feel so issecure about some detail as minor as my areolas , and all on the base of some random comment heard by immature young men clowning around ".
Great logic, btw. You are feeling insecure about something that may be all in your mind , so you are going to botch your nipples with scars and give yourself something you'd have a much better reason to feel insecure about.
"Elective " surgery is elective for the surgeon too, who can choose whether it's the case of performng it or not.
Sure,elective surgery is performed every day, and by legitimate doctors. But that they are legitimate , i.e. they have the credential and the expertise to cut you, does not necessarily mean they are ethical, reputable and responsible, if they are they won't intervene just according to your whims. It's not like going to the baker for a loaf of bread, that as long as you pay you get it : a scrupolous ,consciencious professional will have with you a long interview or two, to assess your probloem, motivations and expectations. If he feels you have a big misperception about your body , or that the operation is superflous / inappropriate for your age / health state / body type, or that will worsen your condition rather than fixing it, he will decline you . Of course, you can always go to the next and the next ... until you find someone so unscrupolous and cynical to exploit your
frailty and insecurity for his monetary gain.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2011): As far as I know, men do not find smaller nipples more attractive, so it is impossible for me to answer your question about why they supposedly like small nipples better? I'm not opposed to plastic surgery in principle. My wife has breast implants. I like my wife's breasts. A lot. Fortunately, she had a procedure done whereby the implants were put in through her navel, so there is no scarring on her breasts.But, I still have no way to answer your question because I am personally unaware of any man who likes small nipples better. I have heard men talk about large nipples once in awhile, but it was always said in a way that made me think the man liked large nipples.However, I can say with absolute certainty that significant scarring around nipples is a big turn off for me. It does depend on how bad it is though. I've seen some scarring that was so slight it didn't make a lot of difference to me.You will ultimately be able to find someone who thinks you are attractive whether you have the surgery done or not. I loved my wife both before and after she had her breasts implants. It ultimately did not make much difference.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@chigirl, sorry, on your first post I typed incorrectly. I meant to say "why should I live with something that makes me feel so insecure." Sorry about that, that's MY mistake. I was typing fast and trying to do something else.Because it's something that's made me feel insecure since I was a little girl, even before the pepperoni nipple comments(which btw, they have no clue I have big areolae, so it's not on purpose). I've always felt that my breasts were out of proportion ever since they began growing and I've continued to feel that way, especially since my weight fluctuates and sometimes my boobs get smaller, sometimes they get bigger and the areolae is normally too big.I just rather have smaller ones. They don't have to be tiny, just in proportion. I rather not dislike myself and my breasts for the rest of my life and continue to feel inadequate.Guys online always claim to love features which are not conventionally attractive. Guys in real life, in my every life who aren't jerks btw say otherwise.Either way, I'm young and i'm not going to save sex until I'm 30 just so I can find a guy who doesn't think so negatively of them.I have asked about larger areolae and a few different forums, and i'm not sure if it's allowed to call names out so I won't say which ones, but they are pretty popular and most responses I get in regards to large areolae are negative. Guys will go on and on about how unattractive they are, how much of a turnoff they are but they always make sure to mention "it wouldn't be a dealbreaker, just a turnoff." Yeah, it feels GREAT to know I could be a turnoff to my partner but because of obligation they'd have to deal with it.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (30 October 2011):
"The terms pepperoni nipples, bologna nipples and pancake nipples exist for a reason and it's not because men love them"
Pepperoni is quite small, but that's aside from the point.
If these are such common terms then why are you the only one who's heard them? Because I never have, nor have the others who posted on here. These aren't real terms, it's just some crap these immature boys you appear to surround yourself with are saying. How about you take one to the side one day and directly asks him what he means by it and if it's true or not?
I don't know why these guys are being rude, but they are. However, they are under no circumstance representative for anyone else. You don't want to be in a relationship with an immature and rude and obnoxious little boy anyway, do you. So why on earth do you care what these blokes are saying? These "terms" are just a load of crap, not real terms that real men actually discuss.
Like I said.. they're just trying to sound cool and impress their friends. They do it because they themselves are insecure... It's common knowledge that boys with little or no experience will be loudmouths and speak of things they really have no idea about, and that is why you hear things like "pepperoni" or "pancakes".
You're hanging with the wrong crowd, not with the wrong breasts. How come you blindly believe what these boys are saying, and refuse to think twice about anything everyone else are telling you? There are men on this site, they've given you their opinion. Why are these men's opinion not worth anything, while you think so highly of the others opinions, so highly that you will go through surgery for it? Isn't that kind of... blowing things out of proportion? What are they anyway to you? Deep and close friends? Boyfriends? Loved ones? Have they ever seen your breasts since you believe the comments are related to how you actually look?
This is, excuse me, really silly. If these boys also told you that they think red hair is pretty would you dye your hair? Probably? Because you will go through surgery for their "valuable" opinions. And when they tell you they like virgins, and you aren't? You'll reconstruct your hymen? And when they tell you they like sluts, you'll sleep around with them too? No?
Where does the line go for what you will allow them to dictate how you look and what you do? Whatever gave them such power over you? Are you dependent on them in some way? Are they forcing you into anything? Do you need something from them? Are you in love with one of them? Exactly what is it about these boys that makes their word the "law" that you must follow?
And when they tell you to jump through hoops you... will do it too I presume? Because that's nothing compared to surgery. I'd take the hoop any day over surgery. But each to their own. If you crave validation from these boys who you haven't described any close relationship with at all, as far as we know they are random people you occasionally meet, then that's your thing to deal with. But excuse me when I find this sort of craving pointless and a waste of time and self worth.
I'll use your story as inspirational talk to young women I meet though, about how far things really can go when you determine your self worth based on random people's opinions. So maybe you can't help yourself, but your story will help someone else who feels they aren't good enough.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (30 October 2011):
" I don't understand why anyone would think I should force myself to live with someone that makes me dislike my breasts."
I don't understand this part. No one here is telling you to live with anyone who makes you dislike your breasts. Are you currently living with someone who makes you dislike your breasts? And if that is so, why not get rid of this horrible person that makes you feel bad about yourself, rather than go through bloody surgery to impress this certain someone, as if THAT is better?
Reality check. Men don't care. If you are currently living with a man who puts you down about your breasts then DITCH the loser. Really. I don't know where you grew up, but women can live and enjoy the way they look, men have no right to dictate how we look, nor do they normally attempt to either.
Sure, I've run into BOYS when I was younger who called me names and picked at me. But in the later years I know how to steer away from unwanted company and idiots none the less. Now I surround myself with wonderful people who actually think I am amazing as well. And the men I pick for my relationships and intimate relations... well, one criteria is that they must adore me. And so they do. I've never heard a complaint, and that is NOT because I am little miss perfect, but because I love myself and men, honestly, love a naked woman.
This isn't some competition to sway you one way or the other, I don't know why you think it is. Nor do I understand why you think I believe I know you. I don't pretend to know you. I don't pretend to know what you are experiencing. But I am telling you what I know, and what I have experienced. And that isn't some made up fairy tale.
Maybe next time you hear guys make those jokes you teach them a lesson in etiquette and manners. Tell them such jokes are offensive and hurtful. Then ask them if they've actually ever seen a real boob, because the way they talk about women you can assure them they never will either. A real woman wouldn't want to be with a man who makes offensive comments about the female body. And if their mothers didn't raise them well then you can at least do yourself and others a favour by not laughing it off, but putting them in place. Maybe ask if they'd think it was funny if you joked about a man's penis shape. They'd hardly find that amusing.
And the truth is that even if they joke about it they don't mean it. They are young and trying to brag, making it sound like they've seen so many boobs they actually know anything about it. All they've seen in from porn. Not a real lady. And they still think it's cool to make boob-jokes. It's kinder garden sense of humour like poop and pee fun. When you grow older, and when you start to spend time with grown up men instead of these boys, you'll not hear such jokes any longer.
I'm just saying. Have the surgery, it's your body. Just don't think that men actually care, because they really don't give a crap. If you find your nipples abnormal, sure, that's one thing. But you really can't blame it on the guys. Because they don't care. As long as they get to see your boobs or have you naked with them in bed they are happy as can be.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have heard many guys make jokes about big areolae and how unattractive they are. I laugh and play it off as though it's not big deal, but it really is. The terms pepperoni nipples, bologna nipples and pancake nipples exist for a reason and it's not because men love them.I understand the costs of surgery and anyone who goes into surgery thinking it will be cheap is ignorant and shouldn't have surgery. Money fortunately is not an issue for me.I don't need therapy or psychiatric treatment, so please spare me that recommendation. Everyone is insecure about something, but some people are willing to change what causes them insecurity and pain.My areolae are out of proportion with my breasts and it bothers me. It may seem ridiculous to other people, but the surgery exists for a reason and I might as well take advantage of it.I realize millions of women get surgery every year and are able to find boyfriends/husbands who do not mind, so this was a light hearted question.I WILL get the surgery because it's something I've had a desire to get since I was little, the jokes and comments about how unattractive big nips are only push me further and confirm my reasons for doing so.I also only came to the conclusion that smaller meant more sensitive because everyone always says smaller breasts are more sensitive and small breasts tend to have small nipples and small areolae.I also agree that it's because it's seen as a sign of youth, to have small ones that is. I can understand from that perspective.Thanks.
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reader, serenity80 +, writes (29 October 2011):
Everyone said it was a pointless operation and there is no difference between small and larger nipples, yet you respond to say you are still having the surgery? Why did you bother to ask for advise if you're just going to ignore it?
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAnd yes, I have heard men make pepperoni nipple jokes and talk about how unattractive big areolae are. I always laugh and play it off as though it's no big deal, but it is. It's something I've always disliked about my body and just hearing those things being said makes me want to do it even more. How about we not assume you know me or my experiences?
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know many young women who have had elective plastic/cosmetic surgery and have had no issues and YES the doctors were legitimate, qualified doctors.Girls perspectives are always skewed to believe the "natural is always best" nonsense when that's not the case.I don't plan on breast feeding nor do I care about sensitivity. This is something that makes ME insecure and I don't understand why anyone would think I should force myself to live with someone that makes me dislike my breasts.The areolae are out of proportion. You haven't seen my breasts or body, so you can't comment on whether it's factual or not.Anyways, millions of women get surgery every year. If you seriously believe ONLY women without scars are able to find men who don't care then I don't know what to say.This was out of simple curiosity. No one is going to convince me otherwise and my intent was not a "who can convince me first" type of deal. As far as cost goes, anyone who goes into surgery thinking it's cheap shouldn't be getting it in the first place. So yes, I realize it costs money. Money fortunately isn't a problem for me.
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reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 October 2011):
Chigirl took the thought from me... This is NOT a cheap surgery and insurance does not cover it.
The surgeon's fee for me was 9k. that did not cover the tests (pathology was nearly 800 dollars alone) or the hospital (another 5k) yes this surgery ran after all was said and done way more than expected. granted I had a tummy tuck with it... but the breast reconstruction part (and no I have no implants just a lift w/areaola reduction) was over 5k with the path, and the drugs etc... hospital time will be reduced in the OR but I was on the operating table under anesthesia for over SIX hours.... this is so NOT a frivolous surgery.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (29 October 2011):
I agree, it's suspicious if a doctor would perform such a surgery. I suspect he isn't a serious doctor then, and only interested in making money. I read an article you might find interesting. Just because someone is willing to perform surgery on you is definitely not enough to qualify them to do so. You need to be critical or else you can end up scarred for life.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2042119/Woman-left-uniboob-botched-breast-surgery-warns-danger-unqualified-plastic-surgeons.html#ixzz1cB2FSZxY
But again, at least own up to your own opinions here, your desire to have this surgery is not at all based on wanting to look attractive to a man. Nor is it about fixing something that actually creates a problem to you. This is a mental issue, it's a psychological issue. And hence it shouldn't be treated with surgery, and can't be treated with surgery. What you need is therapy. Take a hard look at yourself, you'll be happier about it later on if you stopped to actually think about this and think about your reasons for it.
By the way, who's paying?
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reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 October 2011):
I agree with what Cindy said. And I gotta tell you most men in fact ALL the men I've ever been with (and that's more than I care to admit as I was a swinger and attended orgies etc in a previous life).... had ONE reaction to breasts... large or small, big nipples/areolas or small... dark or light... and that was "TITTIES" or "BOOBIES"
The OP said: "I still plan on having the surgery.
I just wanted opinions. I don't care about sensitivity or breastfeeding(which I don't plan on doing)."
you may change your mind as you mature and realize that the ability to sustain our children is priceless... and honey a man with a good tongue on a sensitive nipple can practically bring a woman to orgasm.
A good plastic surgeon is VERY worried about nipple sensation. IT was THE FIRST thing the doctor checked on the morning after surgery. IT'S the first thing he checks at EVERY follow up... IT'S THAT CRITICAL!
Personally if I was a PS and a young healthy woman came to me with the request you are making I would REQUIRE psychiatric counseling to determine why her body image is so skewed and make sure that she gets the help she needs.
A doctor willing to do this totally unnecessary and potentially harmful surgery on such a young person is a quack in my opinion.
Most women having plastic surgery get at minimum two or three consults with different doctors. I know I only went to two before I found one I liked and both the ones I saw had VERY different ideas of what was the proper way to approach my body reconstruction which will require additional surgeries later on down the road...
I'm shocked and appalled that the OP was able to find a doctor willing to do this frivolous surgery on such a young patient.
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reader, CindyCares +, writes (29 October 2011):
Personally I have never heard these kind of jokes about nipples, and I've lived so far with impression that men just like nipples, all kind of nipples,large and small.
It MIGHT be that there is a perception of small areolas being more attractive, because we live in a youth obsessed society; areolas ( in general, with numerous exceptions ) tend to be smaller and lighter when you are very young, and they MAY get larger and darker with pregnancies , menopause and aging. So , subconsciously, small areolas = youth and fertility, large nipples = age and barrenness.
Nevertheless, I think most people would see scarred, perhaps badly scarred breasts as a much bigger turn off than naturally large areolas, should they even be the size of a coffee saucer. This seems a case in which the remedy would be worse than the problem itself.
I also think that a responsible, not-money-hungry,plastic surgeon ( yes, there are some :) would strongly disadvise this operation, and perhaps refuse to perform it.
It sounds that the defect is not in your nipples, but in the way your mind works, in your insecurities. Probably when you'll have fized your areaolas, you'll start obsessing about something else... maybe your nose, or your belly-button.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2011): Your premise "smaller nipples [specifically areolae] are more attractive" is simply not correct factually.If you're going to base your questions on pure nonsense, you might as well ask "why do men prefer smaller penises?" It's easy to see that men are not fond of large penises based on all the jokes about horse c*cks."What men find attractive is at least somewhat subjective, and I know for an absolute fact that some men (like me) find larger nipples more attractive. I have never in my entire life heard another man complain about a woman having large nipples.A factually correct premise would be that some men prefer larger nipples, some men prefer smaller nipples, some men don't really have much of a preference.
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reader, JustHelpinAgain  +, writes (29 October 2011):
This is silly. Men will be more turned off by scars on your nipples. If you really want to enjoy some unnecessary surgery why not get your nose or ears adjusted or something that will be seen and make you feel more outwardly confident. Better still give your spare cash to a charity that could save the eyesight of ten people!
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2011): Excuse me!!!!!! what did you say? This is the strangest thing i've ever heard. Throw away nonsense. Men love mostly bigger nipples. you'll ruin your nipples if you get them operated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI still plan on having the surgery.
I just wanted opinions. I don't care about sensitivity or breastfeeding(which I don't plan on doing).
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reader, chigirl +, writes (28 October 2011):
Oh, and I have a girl friend who has tiny nipples and she's jealous of mine. She wishes hers were bigger. So it goes both ways, you always want what you don't have, but it doesn't mean what you have is a flaw in any way.
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reader, chigirl +, writes (28 October 2011):
I've never heard a man complain about nipples. Ever. I think you might be hanging with the wring crowd or immature little boys who's never seen a real boob. Men love breasts and nipples, and they never complain. This is a personal issue that you have with your nipples. I don't know why you have problems with your nipples, but you don't say that any man you actually care about has told you that he wants you to reduce your nipples. I don't think such a man exsits. However, you are insecure, and want to alter yourself because YOU don't like the way you look. You want to change your nipples because YOU dislike them. Don't try to blame it on men, because like I already said.. no man I come across ever complained about nipples. Men are happy with breasts and nipples of any size and will love yours as well. So the men aren't the problem here. At any rate I think a man, as well as women too, would find insecurity and a lack of self esteem a bigger turn off than your natural nipple size. Any day. You make that choice, and be aware of WHY you are about to go through plastic surgery. You're doing this because of your own insecurities. I'd rather see you work on those insecurities than go under the knife. If you absolutely want surgery I'd at least ask you to wait until you meet a man you love and care about, and who cares about you, and then ask him. If you truly do this because you think MEN want it (and the shallow ones at that), then wait for a real man's opinion please.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2011): Large nipples are not a turn off.The plastic surgery industry has to continually keep convincing people that some things are more attractive than others, if it isn't back hair then it is nipple size, if it isn't large breasts then it is small breasts, if it isn't the size of the breast, then it is the shape of the breast.This is deliberate, and carefully planned, and they have lots of studies and data to couch their advertising and bring in more business. I'm in the medical profession, these people are not your friends, they are not there to help you, they are there to tell you that you are not ok as you are.Take a look at the smooth bodied hairless action heroes of the recent movies...In the 60's it was guys with a lot of chest hair...By getting this stuff done you are confusing what the real issue is. Your body is not the issue, but what you think about yourself is.You are beautiful, I can tell you that without even seeing you, and you need to keep on thing in mind more than that..."hearing many pepperoni nipples and bologna nipple jokes and comments"Those people are just assholes, and if you change your nipples they will make fun of something else.
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reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (28 October 2011):
 WHY - oh WHY do you girls think you have to tamper with the endowments that Mother Nature gave you??????Save your money and take your B/F on a trip to Cancun!!!!!Good luck....
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reader, Honeypie +, writes (28 October 2011):
 If a guy tells you there is something "wrong" with how they look tell him he has small balls.
I mean really! I would NOT do any surgery based on ignorant and stupid people's comments.
We all have nippels, they come in many shapes, sizes and colors.
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reader, serenity80 +, writes (28 October 2011):
I am in my 30's and I have never until reading your question heard that large nipples are supposed to be less attractive than smaller nipples. Says who?
I actually think you must be MENTAL to want surgery to change them. It's not just scaring you could have, but you risk damaging the sensitivity of them and risk problems with feeding children.
My first girlfriend back when I was a teenager had quite big nipples and I can only think of them fondly and I remember I loved playing with them.
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reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (28 October 2011):
I had a reconstructive breast lift and as part of that an areola reduction in June.
HORRIBLE surgery. The areola are now misshapen (not the surgeon's fault it takes MONTHS to heal properly and reset the shape)
My boyfriend could NOT touch my nipples for MONTHS I was so sensitive... of course it could have been WORSE and I could have lost ALL sensitivity... (that's a common side effect of this surgery as they cut all the nerves)
the scars:
all the way around the areola
down the center of the breast from under the areola to the chest then from under the breast curve all the way around to under my arm.
the scars pull
the scars ITCH
the nipples are overly sensitive and I still shy away from having them touched
the areolas are NOT round and cute... they are a bit oblong and puckered. the scars are fading but obvious
DO NOT have this surgery if it's NOT for reconstructive purposes. any man that thinks your breasts are unattractive in their natural state is not worth being a partner with.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2011): Don't do it. My girlfriend brought up with me and she doesn't have those "small ones" you talk about. She told me, and thought I'd be turned off. You think I cared? I was so happy she even let me that close to her. I find her attractive no matter what perceived "flaw" she has. Seriously , the media messed people up, don't believe a word of it. I want my girlfriend the way she is now, and if she wanted surgery I'd beg her on bended knee not too. Find a guy like that. Keep your chin up and be proud about your body
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reader, bardia +, writes (28 October 2011):
 Honestly, if the guy you're with thinks that part of your body is a turn off then he's not the right one. Not to be graphic, but mine are about as large as yours. My boyfriend couldn't believe his eyes when he first saw them & he's actually a big fan of them! So obviously smaller isn't required by all guys. -_o Don't ever feel you need to take that drastic a measure to change your body for a guy. Like I said, if he can appreciate the beauty before him then he's not worth your time...
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reader, JustHelpinAgain +, writes (28 October 2011):
Well, you could just keep your bra on and avoid the surgery. Honestly, unless there is some reason your nipples wont work properly for feeding your future babies I wouldnt do this simply because of a few jokes youve heard. I think the media is responsible for the expected image of many aspects of a womans body, don't fall under their control. Instead, keep yourself fit and trim and be proud of who you are and how you look. I, like most men, are attracted to all nipples, but mostly to the person they are attached to! If ever you find a guy that makes a joke or is insensitive then you can tell him to get lost befor he sees any more of your body!
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