A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:He left me and I'm feeling so heavy. I really do love him but he doesn't feel the same way and it hurts. The last time a guy left me he left me for my best friend of whom he's engaged to and now this guy left me. It makes me feel like I'm not good enough to be with any guy I fall in love with. I feel as if I'm not good enough for them and that they want something better than what they see in me. I'm hurt and I'm drained. I'm alone and crying out for help
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2012): I'm on the verge of the same thing happening to me. only difference is, the dude's ignoring me and tryiong to make me push for the break up. Thing is, I know that I need to love myself more than anythign else. If i dont' love myself.. then no one else will love me. I have a lot of negativity in me. I might not show it.. but when you are close to someone it will come through and eventualyl push them away. Are you the same? Do u feel a lot of negativity and resentment from the first guy betrayign your trust with your best friend?.. It's ok to feel sad love.. jsut gotta look within you. KNOW that YOU are amazing and know that it's his loss. Believe in yourself. Believe you are a good person nd a SPECIAL one.. LOVE yourself completely and you WILL find a man who sees all that. Who loves the confidence u ahev and is attracted to it. He wont' leave u .. NO ONE SHOULD.. but it has happened.. now it's time for you to move on and focus on u! Do all the thign su've wanted to in your bucket list - if you dont' have one make it. .. and make yourself happy. You never know what you will find along the way. HUGS. Chin up beautiful!
A
female
reader, BondGirl72  +, writes (12 June 2012):
 If it makes you feel any better, I honestly think that many people go into relationships not knowing themselves or what they want. They date people to find out what they want and don't want. In the end, it sometimes causes a lot of heartbreak and pain. If people would take the time to get to know themselves and figure out what they want first, it might help matters when it comes to dating and relationships. Have you ever considered that these guys are the ones who didn't know who they were or what they wanted? Most of us have felt the heartbreak you are feeling...we know what it feels like. Hang in there, but realize that break-ups happen for a reason.
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A
female
reader, MyDaysOnceRevolvedAroundYou  +, writes (12 June 2012):
 It sounds like your having a really tough time right now, you need to make sure that your looking after yourself. Your body's natural response to stress is to be drained and tired, especially when it's a stress that's hurt you deeply. I really feel for you, we've all been dumped once and feel the way you do right now. But, listen, you need to keep your chin up high because I'm sure your wonderful, you sound it! Just because this guy isn't the one for you doesn't mean the next guy won't be! I know how much it hurts to love someone and for them to no longer feel the same and it does hurt. But you probably felt like this when your first boyfriend left you for (I use the term lightly) your friend, but look you found love in someone else after him.. And you'll find someone else after this guy too, give yourself chance to heal and you'll be fine, eat lots of ice cream! :)
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (12 June 2012):
 I am so sorry you are feeling so sad. Heartbreak is very painful and going through it twice or more is even worse.
Sometimes loving someone isn't enough, people change and decide they want different things and sadly we have to let them go because there is nothing else we can do.
You must not blame yourself or see it that you are not good enough, even the most beautiful and successful people in the world get dumped at some time or another.
Try to focua on other aspects of your like, your work, your family, yourself. After a painful break up I always say you need to treat yourself like you are recovering from an illness, eat well, get plenty of sleep, take some exercise, allow time for tears and reflection. Your grief will make you feel like you have no energy so you must be gentle and encouraging with yourself and tell yourself that this time will pass...and it will.
Try not to think about your ex's or what they are doing, those thoughts will hurt you further. Don't rush into another relationship until you feel completely healed and ready. If you have some good friends, spend time with them and try to laugh, even if you feel like crying.
I have lost people I loved in my like, on more than two occasions and I know many others who have faced the same...you are not alone and if you handle your sadness by taking care of yourself, you will be stronger.
It is not a question of being good enough for any man...it's a question of being strong enough to realise that the love and respect you give yourself, is what is most important...when you love yourself, others will love you too.
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A
female
reader, Tez7 +, writes (12 June 2012):
im going through the same thing at the moment, and nothing seems to make the pain go away.
but you have to look after yourself, and that means believing that you are good enough, its just these guys werent right for you.
nothing i say will make it easier but some things i have tried are to keep busy and be with your family and friends.
life is too short to dwell on the ones who werent right, so pick yourself up and enjoy life, and in time im sure you will find someone who is right.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (12 June 2012):
 I know that it is hard once you love someone and they finish things, and it must have been really hard when your last partner went away with your best friend. That was horrible and I would not call her a friend after doing that to you. However life does go on and although it is difficult not all men are the same, these two men left you but if you keep searching I am sure you will find the right man for you. Just make sure to take things slow and get to know them before going in to anything serious.
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