A
male
age
30-35,
*hatOtherGuy
writes:What do you do when you have someone you genuinely love just want to be friend?She liked me at some point, but I have no clue how she feels now.I tried looking at her as just a friend, but it's impossible for me. I stopped talking to her on New Years Eve (Hadn't seen her since November), deleted her and her friends from my myspace, deleted her and her friends numbers (I didn't even tell her, didn't wanna make it a big deal) but I still think about her a lot. I was hoping that cutting off all contact would help me move on, but it's not.Well, I saw her two days ago and all these feeling came rushing back. I didn't say anything to her, just gave her a little wave and was on my way. I felt myself longing for her, I did all this work trying to get over her but I ended up right back where I started.What do you think I should do. Should I give it another shot, should I just keep trying to move on? I really have no clue.
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male
reader, ThatOtherGuy +, writes (29 January 2010):
ThatOtherGuy is verified as being by the original poster of the question@Gridrebel...she really stubborn, so it's hard to tell if she cares or not. I was out of town and one her friends saw me when I got back like 3 weeks ago. She asked why I didn't tell her I was back, I was kinda cold when I answered her, so she may be mad at me.
Thanks for the help everyone. I'm gonna see where I stand with her (If I can find a way to get in touch with her), if she doesn't like me at all or if she can't see herself going out with me then I'm gonna let go and do what Artfuldodger says.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2010): It sounds like you didn't get closure, cutting off is the second step after full closure.
So do what you have to do to find out where you stad, what the possibilities are etc. only then will you be able ease your mind.
I'm going through the same thing at the moment but I don't have the luxury of cutting off contact, she needs a friend like me, I live too close and work with her. I admit it makes it difficult to move on but I made sure I knew exactly where I stand and what the prospects are for the future and I'm slowly able to deal with it.
Get closure.
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A
male
reader, Artfuldodger  +, writes (28 January 2010):
Everyone goes through what you are going through, its part of the human emotion. When I say everyone, I mean EVERYONE!!!
In my experience, I think the best way to get over a situation like this is to concentrate on your happiness. Go out there and take part in some activities, have fun, go meet some new people. Go on dates.
Trust me, it will be hard initally but soon you will notice that you are not thinking about this girl as much as you did before. Who knows you might even meet someone you like more than her. But remember next few months should be concentrated on finding your happiness, women will come automatically.
I'll tell you something. I was exactly in the same spot a few months ago. I was so heartbroken, and one of my buddies gave me this advise. So for more than 2 months i used to have an activity planned for every evening. From acting classes, to toastmasters, seminars, coffee shops, book clubs....i just had no time to think about her. I met so many people that I would spend atleast 2 hours everyday in a coffee place with a new woman....just relaxing and having fun.
Guess what one of Her friends saw me once with a very nice looking blonde girl at startbuks, and decided to tell my Crush about it. My Crush called me the next day and left a voice mail asking to meet with me. The message was left in a very seductive tone. But guess what its been 3 weeks and I still havent called back, and she has called me 3 times in the last 3 weeks. My reason, I thought I really liked this girl, but in hindsight I realized she is NOT that great. I have met better girls than her, and thus am not movitivated to call her....
Now you can get there as well......just have faith...and be happy...
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A
female
reader, Gridrebel +, writes (28 January 2010):
 Obviously she hasn't tried to contact you so your feelings are one sided. No one wants unrequited relationships, they suck. Until you get involved with other activities and other people, that emptiness will remain and it will be difficult to move on. You need to replace the old feelings with new ones. I don't mean this as negatively as some people say it but....get a life. Literally! Go do something outrageous and fun, maybe even a little dangerous :)
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (28 January 2010):
I think it's worth giving her another shot, because then you'll know where you stand. If she says yes, all well and good. If she says no, then that will at least help you to move on.
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