A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I need to know ..... what do guys think of girls who make the first move? Ive met someone I REALLY like, we exchanged numbers and have met up a few times. Each time, we get on great and theres a definite attraction between us.The only thing is, I feel like Im the one that makes all the effort to meet him. Its always me ringing or texting him, but then my friend told me that I should never run after the man as this is a turn off to them and if they liked me then they would come to me! Now I feel really silly cos I have texted him loads but its sooooo confusing cos I know he likes me - when were together its so good. Im scared that if I just leave it and wait 4 him to make the moves that he wont!!! What can I do without seeming too pushy? any advice needed .....
View related questions:
exchanged numbers, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2007): Easy one to answer. JUMP HIM. He will not say no and is probably just worried that you don't like him.Girls who make the first move are not a turn off, this is the 21st century!
A
male
reader, Mr Raindog  +, writes (15 August 2007):
 I can only speak from personal experience, but I love girls that make the first move. I'm a passive guy though and it's difficult for me to make the first move since I've been burned by doing so many times. A girl making the first move make me relaxed and washes away my doubts, fears and anxiety about making a move too soon or missing an opportunity I should of pounced on. This is, of course, under the presumption that I'm interested in her.
He might be the type of guy that's accustomed to making the moves and isn't used to girls perusing him so aggressively. If you're doing too much, it's just as much of a turnoff like having a guy drooling over you in a non-cute way. Re-evaluate what you're doing, how much attention you're showing and whether or not scaling back is in order.
...............................
A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (13 August 2007):
 Hi
The guys ive been with loooooove girls to make the first move. I quite like guys that are shy & we wouldnt get anywhere in life if we didnt make the first move on shy guys!
Times have changed, thankfully! Its all good.
C xxxx
...............................
A
male
reader, DJ8433 +, writes (13 August 2007):
 The ritual mating dance. It depends on what you're looking for. Are you're looking for a confident man and a chance at a little more than a romp? Confident men see what they want and go for it. Confident women do the same thing. I think smart confident men look for a sign that a woman is interested, it's up to her to show the interest, then he will approach the woman if he's attracted to her. I think smart confident women will wait for a man to approach her, because that way she knows he finds her attractive. A woman has what a man wants and I think when a woman approaches a man it puts her in a weak position. By approaching him, you're telling him you can have this if you want. If you know that's what you want, then go for it. Don't be surprised if a quick romp is all you get and he ignores you after that. That's my quick two pence.
...............................
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (13 August 2007):
 I can only give an opinion as to what I would like. I would love it if the girl made the first move. That way I wouldn't have to ask myself what she is up to :-).
You mention you do all of the chasing. I'm with Kenny: stop this for a while, and see if the gets back to you. That way you will know what he wants.
Good luck, dear.
...............................
A
female
reader, bumblebee21 +, writes (13 August 2007):
I think it's fine for girls to make the first move. I'm like that with my boyfriend now. I'm always the one to call him or txt him, it's just the way that some mens brains work, unless i txt him with something that needs an answer he very rarely replies because he doesn't see the need to. i would maybe not txt this guy as much and as long as you are both happy with the way things are i wouldn't worry too much.
...............................
A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (13 August 2007):
 In todays day and age i don't think it looks to out of place to make the first move on a guy as it did years ago. However in this case you have made the first move, and have been making moves ever since whilst not getting any feedback.
Your friend is right if you are too pushy it can be a turn off.
This guy could really like you but is just to shy to do anything, or his feelings are not there for you. Which ever it is i would be inclined to stop chasing him for a while and see what happens. If after a week or two you have not heard from him then just ask him outright how he feels. At least then you will know where you stand.
Good Luck x
...............................
A
female
reader, gloriawk55 +, writes (13 August 2007):
 It depeds on the boy. You say he is getting along with you? Maybe he is AFRAID to make the fist move. Maybe his friends have told him girls hate being asked out by boys. It all depends. He's fine with you calling and texting and stuff? Well then. Bring out the Champagne and make a date. Just ask him out. If he says girls aren't supposed to do anything, then maybe he is just not right for you. Don't worry! Take a chance!
...............................
|
