A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Ok this isnt really a relationship question but it is related to boy-girl stuff. A friend of mine told me the other night that he has never bought a girl a drink--he says that its basically like prostitution, paying a girl to like you. This struck me as a pretty bizarre theory and its worrying too, as i dont want a girl to think i look at her as a prostitute :o My question is what do girls think of guys who buy them drinks? Just curious. Thanks :)
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female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (19 August 2011):
its more of an old fashioned and maybe gentlemanly thing to do, if a girl is interested in you she will like that you offer her a drink, if the girl is not interested already she may think you are being a creep for offering but may accept it anyway and then make excuses to leave.
what you need to do is spend plenty of time talking to the girl first and get to assess her before jumping in with the drink offer or you may end up spending a fortune on drinks for girls and still going home with nobody's phone number. some girls rely on drinks off guys they are not interested in to provide them with a cheap night out
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2011): As a female, I hate when men I don't know buy me drinks. It makes me feel like I somehow owe them something if I accept. I would rather they ask the bartender to say they want to buy me a drink - that tells me they are interested and gives me the choice to strike up a conversation or refuse.
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A
female
reader, bunnyblueeyes +, writes (18 August 2011):
I've never heard anything like that in my life!! Women don't think men who buy them drinks are buying sex.
Trust me, that theory is totally bizarre!! Generally offering to buy a drink is a great ice breaker.
Do things your way, not your mates.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2011): With drinks the price they are now I am over the moon if a bloke thinks I am worth buying one for!!!!
Its not any kind of prostitution unless its 2am and they expect and get sex,its more I want to get to know you a bit better.
No thanks is always an option
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A
female
reader, Claraw1 +, writes (17 August 2011):
I agree it's a ice thing to do, as long as there are no string's attached. It show's that you are a nice and considerate person in my opinion.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2011): I think your friend is just cheap. I like it when a guy buys me a drink. I love it when a guy takes me out and buys me dinner or drinks. It makes me feel good. Not like a prostitute. It makes me think he cares and he is trying to impress me.
On the contrary, if a guy didn't offer to buy me a drink or take me out I would feel like he didn't care.
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A
female
reader, tigerfeet +, writes (17 August 2011):
Coooool cheap night out for you. You need the guy to know theres no strings. You can always offer to buy him one in return.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (17 August 2011):
I don't think it's like prostitution at all... it's a nice thing to offer if she does not wish to accept she can decline. As an older lady I used to like it when men purchased drinks for me as long as there were not strings attached (i.e they expected me to go home with them or something)....
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (17 August 2011):
I wouldnt say its paying a girl to like you, if that were the case well us girls are pretty cheap (or easily bought)!
The reason why I like it when a guy buys me a drink is because it is good manners/polite, it harks back to the days when men were gentlemen and knew how to look after a girl, it shows the guy wants to impress the girl and most of all it is an indicator that he is strongly enough attracted to her to actually spend a bit of money to get her to stick around longer to get to know her better.
You would happily buy a friend a drink, so techinically on your friend's principles he would never buy a friend a drink because that is also paying for a person to be your friend!
I think he is a bit silly with these ideas and chances are most girls will get pissed off with him quite quickly if he never buys them a drink, they will either think he is cheap or he is not interested!
Do whatever feels right for you, dont worry about your friend!
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (17 August 2011):
No, not like a prostitute. But I guess in a sense you are buying yourself a chunk of time to talk because some women will feel guilty rejecting someone who bought something for them. It's a polite/nice offer though, and old-fashioned in a good way.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (17 August 2011):
I think it's just the polite thing to do or at least offer.
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