A
female
age
30-35,
*xbabyxmamaxx
writes:So my boyfriend and I have been dating since the 26th of May and he is already ready to have sex. He told me he didn't want to have sex and then leave me. He never lied to me before and we we're the best of friends before this. What should I do? I mean I really want too, but I don't want to lose him. ! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Lilyflower  +, writes (31 May 2012):
 Three days is definitly too soon. I wouldn't call this a guy who's trying to gain your respect before moving to something else. Two persons who respect each other know when the right time is, and although there is no rule of when the "right time" to have sex is...your inner well being will tell you whether it's the right time or not.
One last thing. If you are asking what you should do, then it definitly is NOT your right time to have sex with him. Take care of yourself.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2012): Too Soon! tell him you want to see how the relationship turns out first, if he respects you he will give it time, if not then sex is too important to him and he obviously isn't there for the right reasons. Showing a little disappointment is normal so don't take it the wrong way if hes upset that you think its too soon, but like i said if he cares enough he will understand and wait.
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female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (30 May 2012):
Boyfriend at just 3 days? How can you call him your boyfriend so soon? He has done nothing to earn that status yet! Don't give it away so soon, especially since he's already pressing for it. Looks like sex is all he's after and once he gets it, this 'relationship' will be done.
Like others have said, look at actions, not words. His actions show he only wants some action (pun intended.) Also, just because you guys were "the best of friends" (of which I wonder what meaning it has as 3 days are enough for you to refer to a guy as your bf) doesn't mean that you are now. Dating him officially ended the "just-friends" part of whatever you two have. You are now trying a relationship, and he most likely sees it as a way to get easy sex since he's now upgraded from the just-friends category to the date one.
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A
female
reader, Candycane1234 +, writes (30 May 2012):
 He isn't interested in romance. I had the same situation with a guy some years he kept looking at my body and wasn't up for hugging.
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A
female
reader, mooh  +, writes (30 May 2012):
3 days seems quite quick. If he's serious with you and cares how you feel then he will accept to be more patient. "He told me he didn't want to have sex and then leave me" - Saying words are very easy to do. Stand your ground.
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A
female
reader, Rose Emmy  +, writes (30 May 2012):
 i think he is after it,if he wasn't he would wait little.but all in all romance brings itself, if you want to go ahead but am sure if he meant his words he wont leave.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 May 2012):
 I agree with CaringGuy.
And so do you or you wouldn't be asking.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2012): 3 days? Some guys would be trying to sleep with you after dating for 3 minutes.
Either way the procedure for dealing with it is the same: stand up for yourself and wait as long as you want to.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2012): Actions speak louder than words, if he doesn't want to have sex then leave you then waiting should make no difference to him. If he puts the pressure on because he has to wait, and he could act "nicely" like "oh I love you so much I can't wait until we do it blah blah blah" don't let him persuade you. It's your decision when you feel ready and he must respect that, if he doesn't then he's not worth it.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (29 May 2012):
3 Days! Err, might he just be trying his luck, I wonder? As for telling you he didn't want to have sex and leave you, I think at this stage that might be what he has in mind.
I'd date him longer and make sure you know his motives. Don't give it all away.
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