A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Here's my story,I am inlove with this guy and he's inlove with me also, but both of us are married.Both of us are really attracted to each other and we have a whole lot in common. We get along pretty okay.At the beginning we used to talk on the phone everyday, quite a few times for the day. We have a long distance relationship, we meet once in a few months.He is always busy because he travels a lot for work. I am worried because he doesnt call me as much as he did before and I miss that , and i miss him.Whenever we talk he says how much he loves me and misses me and we are just like normal again, but sometimes he doesn't call me for weeks.What is happening here ? Am i wasting my time ? I love this guy so much, I think that he's my soulmate. My husband is good to me but our marriage was arranged and I never had the chance to fall inlove with someone or date someone. I miss the love of my life and just wondering why he doesn't call me often. can you all shed some light on this for me. Thanksconfused.
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female
reader, sandyo  +, writes (18 October 2007):
i am in a similar situation except my marriage was not arranged. i realy feel for you but how much are you willing to put up with? i found out the hard way that i was only being used but he made me feel like i was his soul mate but only when it suited him. it will be hard to break free but do. i still loved my husband so have concentrated on putting my marriage back on track. you should probably leave your husband and find true love thats right. everyone deserves that. it will be hard and may seem impossible but its not i no, move on with your life its to short to be wasting it on a man like this. you will find happiness and look back and be glad that you are not treated like this no more..
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2007): I feel so sorry for you, it must be really hard. But think about things this way - if both your respective partners fount out about this affair, what would happen? To the kids involved especially?
Take it from someone with first hand experience of this situation - you don't want to go through that! My best advice would be to sort out your own relationship first and tell him to do the same. It will be hard for both of you, but you will then be sure of his (and your own) intentions...Yes, it will cause pain but it will leave the way clear for a legitimate relationship for you both.
I really feel for you hun, it is an awful situation to be in. Hope everything goes well.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2007): You should be putting 100% into your own marriage. Put all of this behind you and just get on with your life. If yours is so bad then end it, but not to go off with this other guy. He certainly doesnt sound like your soulmate to me. You were both there for each other at a certain time in your lives. He has a wife etc, so what do you expect. I bet he loves his wife a lot more than he told you and you were a bit on the side when he felt a little bored or at a loose end. You both sound stop this now, get on with your own lives and forget about anything going on in the future. it will be hard trying to get him out of your head, but you will feel better about it in the future.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, Lila +, writes (18 October 2007):
 I don't think this guys sounds like he's your soulmate I think he sounds like a bored husband,who either has no time for anything real because of his job,found out he misses his wife,or found someone else other than you or his wife,that maybe is more convient to see.In any case,you need a divorce, a clean break.I don't believe in loveless marriages,or trasitioning from relationship to the next.Clean Break,Good Luck.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (18 October 2007):
 Arranged or not, your are not being fair or respectful to your husband. This is wrong, you say you have a long distance relationship, well that's not allowed when you are married. If you're going to play these games, you need to tell your husband and let him go so he can find someone he can be happy with, instead of someone who's prancing around outside the marriage.
He may be realizing his marriage is too important than to mess it up with the games you two are playing. Who know he may have just been playing a game this whole time. People have been known to do that. They tell you what you want to hear. Quick and easy to lour you in.
If you're going to be playing, it's time to speak to your husband about your behavior. Just because you make this choice, doesn't give you any right to do so while in a marriage.
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A
female
reader, ladysuzanna  +, writes (18 October 2007):
 Answer: He has a wife, and he has children. Your marriage was arranged. His wasn't. I think he is just playing a game. I bet you're not the first. Maybe I am wrong, but you should not play around when you're married. Leave him, then you can play all you like. Good luck.(Mod note to poster: it's not difficult to use proper punctuation. Run-on sentences are difficult to read.)Original post: "answer he has a wife he has children you marriage was arranged his wasn't i think he just playing a game the thrill is were off and i bet your not the first maybe i wrong but should not play around when your marry leave him then you can play all you like good luck"
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