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We had a good date, kissed goodnight, but this morning I am blocked!

Tagged as: Crushes, Dating, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 December 2014) 15 Answers - (Newest, 22 December 2014)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *ebeccaa writes:

Hi, hopefully going to be a short question! If not forgive me.

So I started talking to this guy a few weeks ago. I know him through my ex but they aren't good friends they jusy know eachother.

He asked when he could take me out we chose friday (last night). Before the date we were always texting, huge essays lots of emojis we seemed to be getting on really well. A couple of days before the date he confessed to me that he had been seeing a a girl and didn't think it was right to take me out since she had waited for all the drama to disappear with his ex so that they could be together. I told him I respected his choice and respected him for telling me before it was too late. We were both quite upset because from what we could tell we would have gotten on great and both wanted the same things.

Anyway not long after he text me and said he had changed his mind and had spoken to his friends about the situation they told him he was single and if he felt he would get along with me better than this other girl then he should give it a chance, he told me him and this other girl didnt talk like we did and she didn't make him feel as wanted as I did.

So we went ahead and met up we went to a restaurant. I thought the date went okay, we were talking he did talk about jos ex a little bit and asked me about mine so obviously I answered. I didn't offer to pay I was going to but totaly forgot, but he did mention before not to bother bringing any money because he would pay, I felt bad and brought some anyway but forgot!

When we got up to leave I had my coat in my hand and we walked back to the car and was quite cold he asked me if i was cold and put his arm around me. (Felt like that was a good sign).

After he had taken me home he had to pick his friend up from another city and was pretty late so I didnt want to keep him. When we pulled up outside my house I gave him a peck on the lips hugged him and left. I didn't expect a message straight away as he would havw been driving but later on I realised he was online so I just sent him a message saying good night he replied saying "night babe".

I woke up this morning and he's blocked me! What is that all about?! What on earth did I do wrong?

View related questions: his ex, money, my ex, text

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2014):

I am so sorry he block you

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A female reader, Rebeccaa United Kingdom +, writes (22 December 2014):

Rebeccaa is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Rebeccaa agony auntThank you for all the advice everyone, really appreciate it. Makes me feel loads better :) x

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (21 December 2014):

Honeypie agony auntThis wasn't your fault.

I think you were NOT the only girl he was seeing or maybe the "ex" wasn't REALLY an "ex" - he blocked you so he wouldn't have to explain you to another girl.

And yes, the picking up a friend was a "move", not necessarily the truth. It could have been twofold. 1. in case he wasn't as into you in person as he had hoped or 2. so you two wouldn't end up going home together.

I would block him, delete his number and move on.

HIS LOSS, honey.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2014):

Don't have anything more to do with him. As soon as he told you that he was seeing someone else that should have been the end of it- if he was seeing someone else he was two timing both of you, if not he's a liar. If he contacts you again, ignore him or better yet just block him and begin to forget about him and the whole event. You did nothing wrong.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2014):

This guy is keeping secrets. The whole story with this girl that he likes is weird. I wouldn't go with a guy who tells me the re is another girl that heis interested in. Guys have a habit to date several girls as it is, but to tell you "honestly" about someone for me is just mind games. If there is another girl than he has no business dating.

Blocking you is another proof that he is keeping secrets.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2014):

It has nothing to do with you or anything you did. It certainly has nothing to do with money and him paying for dinner. He's acting weird because he is scared of something. It's either fear that your ex will find out or fear that another woman will.

I don't know which one it is. But I can assure you he is afraid of something along this line, that's why he cancelled your date the first time. He was just having doubts but then after some thought changed his mind and took you out. But clearly those doubts and that fear hadn't really subsided. That's why he cut the date short on the excuse he had to pick a friend. Who makes plans after a date? Most people leave that time open just in case the date goes well. That was just an excuse. For some reason he felt guilt possibly fear of his thing with you being exposed and when he got home and saw your message, he deleted you.

It's likely because of another girl or your ex boyfriend.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2014):

I think you dodged a bullet there! He sounds like an arsehole - Blocking you??? Seriously, don't worry, you're just wasting your time and your energy if you pay it too much thought. OK I get the impression u kind of fancied him, but honestly, it's Christmas & I bet there are lots of gorgeous guys out there for u who will treat u properly & aren't idiots & won't act half as nastily & insensitively as this dude. Good luck, you :D

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A female reader, Rebeccaa United Kingdom +, writes (21 December 2014):

Rebeccaa is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Rebeccaa agony auntThat did cross my mind that the story about him needing to pick his friend up was bs, but he said it as soon as I got in the car, surely he couldn't have made his mind up that fast? All he ever kept saying in our messages was how well he thought we were going to get on and how high his hopes were. Also he kept telling me he wanted commitment and a girlfriend and how he thought we'd make such a lovely couple.

The situation is so baffaling. I'm glad no one thinks its something ive done. All I kept thinking was "what if there was something stuck in my brace?!"

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2014):

Blocked you from what? Social network site?

Well that story about having to pick up his friend right after your date was bs. I do that too when I go on a date but am not sure about the person. I make up some 'plans' I have to attend to after the date, in case I need an excuse to escape. That's why you saw him online.

And that story about this other girl who is also in the picture..I dont know if its true or not but again its a way to keep things casual between you and him. He threw that in to forewarn you that he isn't totally available.

And blocking you...that's pretty outrageous.

I think the only mistake you made was giving this guy a chance. He plays games, sounds super immature. Good thing you let him pay. At least you got a free dinner out of him wasting your time.

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A female reader, Rebeccaa United Kingdom +, writes (20 December 2014):

Rebeccaa is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Rebeccaa agony auntThank you everyone. This makes me feel a little better.

I dont have a clue what it was. Ive analysed every thing I did. Was it because I didn't pay or offer?

Is it something to do with the fact he knows my ex? Is it something to do with the other girl?

God only knows!

But oh well at least its now not a few months down the line.

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A female reader, louise9696 United Kingdom +, writes (20 December 2014):

I think you've done well here, its better for him to show his cowardly ways now than later on where you may have began to have major feelings for him. Never mind, he obviously isn't worth it and I know it must be horrible because he's been a bit deceitful but honestly you're better off having this happen now than later:')

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (20 December 2014):

Anonymous 123 agony auntHow do you know he's blocked you? Anyway, if he has then its pretty obvious that he's more into the other girl OP. He probably thought that it had a better chance of it working out with her because he was skeptical about going out with you in the first place because of her. Forget it, it was just a date, don't let it bother you. Don't take it personally OP, it's got nothing to do with you. A guy who doesn't cherish you isn't worth being with anyway. You didn't do anything wrong, it just didn't click. That's it.

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A female reader, WhenCowsAttack United States +, writes (20 December 2014):

I don't think you did anything wrong. Sounds more like he didn't feel the spark and didn't have the courage to tell you because he is a coward.

Bullet dodged!

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A female reader, RubyBirtle United Kingdom +, writes (20 December 2014):

I don't think YOU'VE done anything wrong except go on a date with a flaky, confused guy who's still a bit hung-up on his ex and doesn't know what he wants. And that's hardly your fault - it happens to a lot of us.

I don't know why some people have to resort to blanking/blocking people instead of being honest but I guess some people hate any kind of confrontation or situation where they have to face someone's dissapointment.

So you've every right to feel annoyed but DON'T think it's your fault or anything you did - HE'S the flaky one with no gumption and no manners.

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A female reader, Anonny United Kingdom +, writes (20 December 2014):

That sounds awful.

If there is one thing worse than getting dumped - it is getting dumped and blocked with no further contact - the heartache can be worse not knowing what's going on!!

However, if there was another girl on the scene - chances are he wants to concentrate on her without further disruption - it has happened to me before - (without the blocking though)!

On a positive note - it is still quite early after the event - he may still unblock you - or if he has your mobile number could still ring or text. It could be a genuine mistake, or maybe he has just panicked not knowing where to go from here!

Hope you find out what is happening!

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