A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi Guys,so im just wondering what people think. I'm almost(!!) 22 and im still a virgin. I mean i have done fooling around with guys and i have had lots of boyfriends but i have never had sex with any of them.Im not sure what the issue is, im not scared or whatever and im not realllly waiting for 'the one' its just never really become an issue.But now im getting older and im like hmm are there guys who have actually not had sex at 22 and i mean what will it be like when i eventually choose to have sex with somebody! its probably stupid im asking you this anyway but i just wanted some other thoughts on the matter? thanks :D
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male
reader, Shortwife  +, writes (18 January 2011):
Good on you if you meet mr right and it happens it will always be memorable. Be proud of your accomplishment of not giving in to outside pressures. I am a male and started having sex which I still love at an early age. So don't do it unless you want!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): Virgin as 22 is only bad if you never had a boyfriend.
You just haven't found that special someone yet.
You have all the qualities, self-respect etc. and not shy of getting the guys. If you found that person then you would give it up.
I am a guy and its really hot to have a girl who is a virgin. After 26+, people then typically settle with someone they really feel connected to. it is such a shame when both normally have had much experience with others.
So I say, stop being so down about it. Do not force yourself to lose it, you will end up making mistake after mistake. Stay a virgin until you find that person or become too experienced (I think you know what word I mean)
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A
male
reader, Learner.uk +, writes (16 January 2011):
 Hi, even as a guy i wish i was you and held out, there is nothing wrong with you having your v-plates wait for that special guy or when your ready, hope this help's, feel happy and positive. All the best.
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A
female
reader, Fabulosa  +, writes (16 January 2011):
 Why do people think being a vergin is negative? Andwhy wouldn't you want to wait for " the one"?
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A
female
reader, Battista +, writes (16 January 2011):
No need to feel bad about it!
It sounds to me that, instead of you not knowing what the issue is, perhaps there isn't an issue. You've had bfs and fooled around- just because you haven't had sex is no bad thing at all and not a problem. As you say, you're not scared. I reckon you just haven't met the right guy yet. Moreover, being nearly 22 doesn't matter at all. It's not old, if that's what you're worried about.
Don't worry, it'll happen.
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A
male
reader, jimmy2 +, writes (16 January 2011):
 Hi D,
It's possibly a little different for guys but I'm a guy who, believe it or not, didn't lose my virginity until I was 35! When I was your age, I thought exactly the same way you did - I felt like I was in despair and that this would never be resolved. All my mates had lost theirs and I felt like life was passing me by, so imagine waiting for another 13 years before this happens! Even if you did, you would still be young at 35! Never lose sight of that & relax a little.
BUT - and this is a big BUT - when it finally happened to me it really was not nearly as good as I imagined it would be for all those years. Sure it was good, but I'd painted this picture of it being an unbelievable pleasure and the plain truth is it wasn't!
If you rush into this without giving it any thought, you are very likely to go with someone willing just for the sake of losing it and you will probably find that this person is just out to use you and you WILL end up very hurt! Don't let this happen.
You must stop convincing yourself that because you are still a virgin, that it somehow makes you beneath your friends or some kind of saddo - it actually makes you better than them and it took me years to realise this, so take it from someone who knows.
There are no rules set in stone here but when you do lose it, make sure it is with a guy who is prepared to wait several dates and someone who will not walk away just because you won't sleep with them after a night out. These guys are not worth it no matter how much you may think you like them. Get to know the guy first because these are the special ones and it's only with someone like this who you will find exactly what you are looking for. Hope this helps. Good luck for the future.
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (16 January 2011):
hey there! You're not alone! If you brose the enormous virginity section of this site you will see there are A LOT of people your age who still have their V card. The problem with society today is that somehow it's become acceptable or atleast unsurprising when underage teens have sex with eachother, and that everyone who isn't in the "normal" zone usually feels like a freak.
Don't. You're not the one being stamped as a slut, nor the one with tons of STD's, nor the one who became a single mom at a young age. Being these 3 things is "normal" apparantly, but are they desirable? I think not.
I think guys would be honoured to be with you instead of that slutty girl. Also, read up on retroactive jealousy: lots of guys have problems when their girl has had sex with many in the past.
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A
male
reader, shadowlove +, writes (15 January 2011):
Just wait, there is no need to rush it.
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A
male
reader, J.T.1988 +, writes (15 January 2011):
 Well, I'm a virgin and almost 23. So try not to feel to bad about it.
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