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This may be the last time I see her - Should I confess my feelings?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 June 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 11 June 2011)
A male United States age 30-35, *antspaintogoaway writes:

I was dating a girl who i fell mad in love with. After losing my virginity to her and sweeping her off her feet, somehow we broke up. What seemed to be the most amazing 6 months of my life were over. I put everything i had into the relationship. I gave this girl a candle lit dinner just for the heck of it and i was only 16 at the time. It seemed we were so in love.

We still hook up sometimes,go out on dates and make love. But she doesnt even consider dating me. She obviously still has feelings for me, she says i love you sometimes.

We havent talked in about a month.

I went to night school and am graduating one year before i was supposed to. I am moving to florida by this august. She is aware and doesnt seem to care. She thinks im going down there to culinary, but i decided to change career paths.

I am going into the military.

I am stuck. I dont know if i should tell her i am still deeply in love with her or not. IT could be the last time i ever see her. We are going to an amusement park in a few weeks, and i plan for that to be the last time i see her. Especially if she doent want to be with me.

So should i tell her how i feel, or move on with my life? I honestly would do anything to be with her, i just wish she could see what she had.

View related questions: broke up, I love you, military, move on

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A female reader, bittersweetmemory  +, writes (11 June 2011):

bittersweetmemory agony aunthey there

this sounds like a really sad story..but you're both so young..

you know she knows you're leaving and maybe that's exactly why she doesn't want to date you or be with you in a relationship...

i think you can tell her how you feel about her because maybe if you don't tell her you'll regret it your whole life not telling her... see what she says and maybe try to ask her why she didn't want to be with you anymore?

hope it goes fine, take care and good luck with everything

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A male reader, oneguy United States +, writes (11 June 2011):

oneguy agony auntIf she could see what she had, she would tell you on the face and zealously wrap herself around you and never let you go. You have somehow come to the conclusion that your life isn't worth it anymore.

Anyway, soldier, you have your duty in front of you and nothing else matters when you are in war. Your job is to kill the enemy without injuring yourself, and coming back to your Mother and Motherland.

Come back soon and safe, stupid brave kid.

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A female reader, BeautyOfTragedies United States +, writes (11 June 2011):

BeautyOfTragedies agony auntYou seem to be truly in love and it is obvious you have a long history with this person so why not take the risk. I understand it may hurt rejection but after all this time why not? if it is the last time you see her might as well express what has long to be said.If she loves you like she says she does she will embrace your feelings towards her and if not then it is obvious she lacked commitment .It shows that she thinks of you as someone to relay on but now it is time for you to take a step because your are at cross roads wether to take that step or leave as you both are.You may still have her in your life in w.e way you chose but i say there is no life without risk.

Good luck with every thing and wish you the best.

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A female reader, MissTellAll United States +, writes (11 June 2011):

MissTellAll agony auntIf she doesn't want to be with you and doesn't show any intentions of a future confessing your love will ultimately cause you more pain. I know you love her, I know you see her as the end all be all of human existence but realize something- you can do better.

You've posted on here about this girl before I think? I believe I gave advice similar to this then and I stand by it. If she can't appreciate the love you have shown her in the past then she is undeserving of it. The fact that she still goes out with you and has sex with you shows that she is in it for her own gratification. Maybe some part of her cares/cared about you but causing you the pain she has shows that she puts herself before you and you should put yourself before her.

what I would tell her is that you wish things would have worked out better, but you have to move on for your own well being.

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