A
male
 ,
*earCupid
writes:Hi everyoneAndrew, site guy here!I ask this periodically...1. What new features would you like to see?2. What other websites do you use regularly?3. Where are you from?Thanks to all the agony aunts, moderators and of course those with problems who ask for help...Can I ask everyone a favour? If you use DearCupid and like it, tell one person about it this week. Could be a friend, a relative, a post on your MySpace or blog... But please help spread the word :-)Andrew
View related questions:
myspace, period Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, DearCupid +, writes (23 September 2006):
DearCupid is verified as being by the original poster of the question Hi everyone
There have been some interesting ideas here.. I am going to "unsticky" now but will post shortly with what the next site update will contain. Thanks to everyone for their suggestions!
A.
A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (23 September 2006):
 A sent messages feature is already available. It is on the left side of your mailbox.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2006): Hi, I recon an archives file, or sent messages section would be tops, as I often forget what I wrote in reply to someone.
Keep up the great work.
...............................
A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (23 September 2006):
Regarding the ratings feature, how about using a feedback rating similar to the one used on ebay?
There would still be the 3 options, as is the case with ebay. When you leave feedback, you must also leave a comment. This left feedback can also be displayed on the aunts page, again, as seen on ebay funnily enough.
If I like a particular comment, I would rate it and leave my comment.
The feedback rating would appear next to the aunts name.
I think it could work, albeit with some tinkering and modifying of course.
...............................
A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (22 September 2006):
Hi
The only problem I really have is the search feature. Maybe its just me but I find it near impossible to find a post I once saw.
Is it possible to add more categories? There are many questions which I feel do not really fall into any of the existing categories. Maybe one like Love Advice or Crushes.
I visit many sites every day, mainly related to Titanic, my trusty ebay and a few others.
I am 29 and live in Liverpool, England
...............................
A
female
reader, anon2907  +, writes (22 September 2006):
 Hi Andrew!
There's been some great suggestions I think from people here - I would like to add my vote to seeing who's online (and an option to not show if you are online!) and a spellchecker. I'd also like to vote against a chat room for various reasons but primarily moderation and that the forums seem a pretty cool place to hang out anyway.
I think DrPsych's idea of magazine articles covering the basics is a really good idea, even in my short while as a visitor I notice the same 'Am I pregnant if.....' type questions - so maybe people in those situations would refer to those in the first instance.
The other thing I'd personally like is to be able to change the font I use to reply or just to view the site - but only because I'm not a big fan of TNR!!
I do occasionally visit handbag.com because they have some good forums, but not much else really - I've found this is a really cool website and I've made some friends here as well, which has been an unexpected but delightful bonus.
Oooh, and I'm from sunny London :))
Appreciate all your efforts,
Anon2907
...............................
A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (22 September 2006):
 LOL
Yes,that wasn anothet feautem a spekl checkeer itn needed.
Really what I meant to write is:
Yes,that was another feature, a spell checker AND A GRAMMAR check is needed!!!! Thanks David!!!!!!!!
...............................
A
male
reader, DearCupid +, writes (22 September 2006):
DearCupid is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Wendy
(going to reply to all the earlier feedback, too)
Quick note on ratings. You're right they are far from ideal. Currently, poor = 1, average = 5 and excellent = 10 so I just average it (after stripping out lots of ratings to get rid of spam or malicious ratings - can't go into exact details) to get the rating. You are quite correct however that the number of questions answered / answers rated should be factored in. If anyone can come up with a good suggestion of how to do this, let me know.
I don't just want to add up the ratings because then someone prolific but terrible will eventually end up top. I do want a way to factor it into the equation.
Help!!!
Andrew
...............................
A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (22 September 2006):
hence the need for a spellcheck or edit feature, lol
...............................
A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (22 September 2006):
*eith* surprisingly ought to be *it*
cant spell again today!!! sorry
...............................
A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (22 September 2006):
I dont get eith either Wendyg!! How is it rated out of ten anyway, makes no sense to me!!! I am not a blonde, but I dont get it either!!! lol Andrew please enlighten a beautiful blonde and a reasonable brunette, thanks very much. xXx
...............................
A
female
reader, Wendyg +, writes (22 September 2006):
 I dont understand the rated by question asker anyway...
I mean yeah I get that the one currently at the top of the list means they have been rated by the question askers 8 times with a high rate, presuming excellent, = 10.00 what I dont get is that someone that has a score of say 9.42 from 86 questions askers is surely higher ? Or someone that had 9.80 from 23people.. I dont get it... Maybe its because Im blonde. so top of the list is sexseashot 10.00 from 8. But at number 5 its Purrfectionist84 rating 10.00 from 10.00people, which to me is more than 10rated by 8people see what I mean ? I thought having 10 rated from 10 would be higher than 10 rated by 8 Im lost at the whole thing lol.. and now im curious lol
...............................
A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (22 September 2006):
 I was just reading through other replies and the idea to be able to go back into your answer to edit it before it is posted would be handy as sometimes you may not notice a mistake until its too late or might have something else you would like to add and it saves you posting again.
It would be nice if we was able to use different font styles and colours, making us all individual adding a more personal touch and would brighten things up and easy to read when reading through questions and answers :o)
...............................
A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (22 September 2006):
 What new features would you like to see?
Magazine style articles on issues that regularly seem to pop up on this website would be probably useful to readers. Contraception advice, STD's, abortion, drugs, domestic violence etc.
2. What other websites do you use regularly?
I used to moderate on ivillage but they require more commitment from moderators than your website so I came here instead.
3. Where are you from?
I am from London, UK although working at Oxford University looking at child and adolescent mental health issues. I am a psychologist who is now doing research, and I REALLY like this website.
...............................
A
female
reader, camille +, writes (22 September 2006):
 I'm receiving followup private messages from individuals and it's very hard to know what 'problem' they are referring to. Is it possible to have a contact Aunt button or something next to a response so that when it arrives in the inbox, it is automatically linked to their original posting. Gosh, that wasn't very articulate, sorry! I hope you understand? I'd just rather not say "I'm sorry but I can't remember your issue" as it's important to them and that may seem like it's not to me.
I work in the music industry and one of my jobs is running a website, so I visit that several times a day as well as about a hundred others! None similar to this though. I found it via Google and dismissed the rest it brought up.
I live in Cheshire, UK.
...............................
A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (22 September 2006):
I was all for a chatroom feature, but I now would prefer to not include one. As we all have computers, we could just use MSN or whatever if we all wanted a group chat.
I would like to see a spellchecker though, or the option to edit your own answers before they have been added to.
I would like the ability to check an IP to see what questions and answers a particular person has given. The shared computer reason is legitimate, but I feel it would be a handy feature. Especially if a particular person is constantly asking false questions.
I would like the ability to see what other agony aunt are online.
Currently, moderators are indistinguishable from other users. Is is possible to change the colour of the moderators name? On many sites, moderators names are coloured green.
The ability to see which answers were rated would be excellent, although I feel some people will give a poor rating based purely on the fact that they do not agree with the advice.
Currently, when you access another site, e.g, career advice, there is no direct link back here as is the case when you navigate FROM here.
Also, maybe a feature should be included to stop moderators from vetting questions and answers when they are drunk or hungover, LOL. (cough)
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2006): Hi Andrew,Firstly, I want to thank you for an amazing site, dedicated to helping people who at times feel they are alone in the world or on their own regarding a personal problem.I was fortunate to find this site, and it has helped me in more ways then one. I had gone through a terrible, complicated breakup, and I believe I found an angel, an agony aunt that helped me through it and she, (if she reads this she'll know who she is)has helped me and made me a stronger person, and I am thankful to have met her, and she is now a very close valued friend of mine, one of which I cheerish.Regarding Bonym's question, I do understand what she is saying regarding the shared pc/ip address.There are public computers that might share the same pc/ip address and more than one person that will use a particular computer, hence where there might be a regular address that appears but possibly not the same user.I hope that makes sense, granted I am not a computer whizz.I agree with the spell check, It'll be a huge help, as sometimes when you type really quickly some words end up looking like other things of which might possibly even change the intial question or answer that we posted.I recon removing the anonymously posted answers, and questions will also be a bad move as some people feel more comfortable, I know I do.Perhaps an age group bracket, just thought of that now. along with where the person is from, but that can be an option?Any how once again thanks for a great site.Martin-South Africa
...............................
A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (22 September 2006):
Hiya Andrew,
I agree it would be nice to see what questions rated what so you can learn from your answers whether they had a good or bad rating (especially bad), although I do believe these ratings should still stay anon and being as it's not just the person that posted the question can rate it the rating doesn't have to have come from that person maybe just a person viewing the previous replies and as long as this is made clear then it shouldn't discourage anyone from rating or anyone thats been rated hounding the poster of the question as to why they gave that responce.
I agree a spell check would be a good idea as some people may find they can't get their point across properly and use the right words as they find the spelling a problem.
I don't use any other website as I'm pretty addicted to this one :o)
Joined your site quite awhile ago and still loving it :oP
I'm in England.
Toria x
...............................
A
female
reader, Amethyst  +, writes (21 September 2006):
 1. Hmm... new feature.... maybe have some features that are more commonly used on forums, if that's even possible. Like, for instance, an online now icon? o.O; Uhhh.... maybe something that states what country we're from at least.... you know, how it says, "a female reader, Amethyst, writes".... maybe add "Amethyst from USA". I dunno, I get confused on what I should say a lot because I don't know where people are and as we all know, different countries have different laws and such. Umm, oh yeah, and a spellcheck would be nice! :) I know, I ask for way too much... but I wanted to give you some ideas.
2. I use my DA account a lot.... http://amethystrose15.deviantart.com
I also work on my website... and... I use MySpace sometimes... then here... :P
3. I'm currently located in Virginia, USA. Soon to be New York, USA. ^^
...............................
A
female
reader, Doncella +, writes (21 September 2006):
I'm very glad I found this web site, I want to thank to all the people who make this posible and special to you Andrew you have all my respect.1. Maybe it will be nice to have a speling check (i need :-)2. I'm very new here, and i think i'm all ready adictit to the wep.3. I'm from Bolivia but live in Maryland USA for 2 years.Thank you for helping me.
...............................
A
female
reader, Rachx +, writes (21 September 2006):
Hi, I too love the site it has helped me through some very difficult times and situations in the past 12 months.I tell all my friends and work colleagues about the site too.! I agree that removing the option to post yr question anon is a bad move, some people are embarrassed etc and are drawn to the fact you can be anon, I think it would deter some people. Also I dont think a chat room is a good idea at all!
Oh, I'm from North West England, near Preston, Lancashire.
xx
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2006): Andrew, where are you from?
...............................
A
female
reader, Pammie73 +, writes (20 September 2006):
Hello there,
Just wanted to say that I love this site too!
It has been an immense help to me, and of course, I have recommended it to all my friends!
In terms of suggestions, I would say it's definitely helpful to allow people to post questions anonymously - I know I wouldn't have posted certain questions if I'd have had to provide a user-name and register...
Anyway, keep up the great work Andrew!
Oh, and I'm from London, UK, by the way.
...............................
A
male
reader, DearCupid +, writes (20 September 2006):
DearCupid is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJadzia - noted about what answers are top rated. I'll look into this but I think last time I looked individual answers get so few ratings that they are meaningless... It's only when you aggregate ratings for all answers that anything meaningful starts to appear. But, I'll look again. Noted on the spam problem, there is a fairly easy work-around to stop these and I'll make sure it goes into the next update. Thanks for the feedback!
...............................
A
male
reader, DearCupid +, writes (20 September 2006):
DearCupid is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWild - click on "see your sent messages" on the mailbox screen, to see previously sent messages!
...............................
A
male
reader, Wild Thaing  +, writes (20 September 2006):
 1. New feature: A "Sent items" folder to see the PMs we have sent to others. I tend to forget what I write.
2. This is the only site I visit when it comes to relationship advice.
3. I live in Canada.
...............................
A
female
reader, Jadzia1127 +, writes (20 September 2006):
 I meant that the ratings could still be anonymous but it would be nice to see what answers are being rated lower and what ones are getting top ratings.
As a moderator I would LOVE the ability to block those annoying anonymous spam IP addresses. I also understand the difficulty in that, but it still would be nice.
It would be nice to see who is online and I am not against seeing who else is a moderator.
There are plenty of chat rooms online to just chat. If one comes about here, it should be special and helpful for those seeking advice. Like an online group therapy session, a moderator or a top agony aunt overseeing the group, a chosen topic or problem to discuss in the group, and a set time. I think there are at least a few agony aunts here that have the background, to lead a group session.
Oops I think I gave more then my two bits now.
It's a great site as it is and anything you do will just make it more spectacular.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2006): I think removing the anonymous option would be a very bad move. Some people wouldn't post questions if they couldn't do it anonymously. In the spirit of that this has been posted anonymously!!
To answer some of the other questions I think the site is fantastic, and I am in Australia.
...............................
A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (20 September 2006):
Hi Andrew, yeah sorry it was late when I typed that about the IP so it probably sounded like gibberish!!! All I meant is this: one time you were talking about some junk being posted on the site and you said it was coming from the same IP address, but what I mean is, if the PC is shared for example, then the IP is the same right?? So sometimes you may get numerous responses from the same IP anonmously but not from the same person, does that even make sense, I have a migraine today so it probably doesnt, anyway it was just a thought, perhaps meaningless that popped into my head!!!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, Wendyg +, writes (20 September 2006):
Hi,
Oh wasnt so much I was seeking for recognition it was more over to see who else was online at the same time and if they too are a moderator.
Anyway You know I like to rant on!
...............................
A
male
reader, DearCupid +, writes (20 September 2006):
DearCupid is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi everyone
Thanks for the feedback so far, every suggestion is valuable! I've stickied this question and will leave it at the top for a couple more days.
Helen1986 - chat room is often suggested and may happen one day but not in the near future... To do well takes a lot of effort and I'm wary that it will just turn into a general chat-room. There are also issues with moderation etc.
BonyM - profiles and the ability to upload more images are very much in the pipeline. Should go live in October because I have much of the technology already ready, just needs to be stitched into the site.
Stina/Jadzie - the rating issue has now been regularly raised. So, I am going to look into letting you see what question askers have rated your answers... but this will be a test. I don't want to discourage people to give ratings or have people pestering for ratings/asking why they were rated down. The main aim of ratings is to encourage good aunts (who see their overall rating is good) and discourage bad aunt (who see their overall rating is poor).
BonyM - don't get your point about the shared PC/IP.. can you PM me in more details!? :-)
TheSkyCastle - thanks for the feedback. A love journal is something I've been considering for a long time. I will probably roll out a very simple one before the end of this year to see if it gains any traction.
Ariel/Eduardo - thanks for the feedback
WendyG - thanks for the feedback. I will make sure that in the next change, moderators are given some recognition so we know who they are (I forget, too!)
...
Any more feedback/comments/questions welcome.
A.
...............................
A
female
reader, Wendyg +, writes (20 September 2006):
Well what can I add lol... I tell anyone and everyone that will listen about Dear cupid, Even my boyfriend refers people now! lol.. Dear cupid has in the last 2 years taken over my life, but in a good way! Have loved the changes to date and I guess the only think im looking for is a spell checker LOL. My Bf sometimes threatens to take the plug off our pc at home, as when hes trying to ask me something I just nodd and say yes without a clue what hes going on about1 LOL.. he too sometimes answers some bits on here and I ask him for his opinions as hes more to the point than me!
I agree with Ariel and Maxsteel that a Chatroom would take over, and I know they are rather complex, whilst the idea is nice, if problems do want to be shared, aired or discussed this can be done in the forums, or by private mail, yes it can take a while for people to reply, but at that point you can choose to interact with others outside of the site if you so wish... (not meaning move away from dearcupid, but there is an option to make a friend and interact on another level)
I have made a few friends on here and will continue to do so, and we still manage to interact and have fun within the forums, anyone can post there and add a topic and it can be discussed freely, I have made my friends in the forums as well as in the advice I give. A chatroom will take the focus off the reason the site is here. We often have a bit of banter in the Forums, its a shame that not so many do use it.
I dont agree with the person that said not to allow anon posters as that doesnt help anybody. An anon poster may just be passing by and then later on register anyway, and their input is just as valid. Alot that do already post are registered members but choose to post Anon,(not everyone wants the world to know they have a problem and could stop someone posting for fear of everyone knowing) I believe by taking that away people will not be quite so happy to post their problems if you get me! Just because the question says its from an Anon poster doesnt mean they are not registered. In anycase, if someone is only going to ask the one question and then not come back does that then not make them a valid question asker? anyway im ranting...
The rating thing... I dont think in the whole scheme of things it matters that much, if someone likes what you write they like what you write, if someone disagrees with the advice that you give or you dont tell them what they want to hear then they will rate you poor even if its an excellent answer. We all have diff views and cant always agree with someone else. its all about the individual question asker and how we helped that particular individual at that time. what works for one doesnt always work for another.
Oh I would like to see and be able to identify other moderators if poss, so dont know if you are able to but a star by the name or something..
Love the site should do more work than I do, but Im addicted!
...............................
A
female
reader, Jadzia1127 +, writes (20 September 2006):
Since I have been here, the rating system gets brought up every time you ask for suggestions. It really doesn't help anyone to be rated and not have a clue what they did to get a low rating. It is like a teacher giving you a low grade but not marking your answers wrong.
The spell check idea gets brought up too. I have found that Google has a web bar for explorer that has a spell check built in and it works perfectly with this site.
This site gets more my of my free time then any other. Because you asked, when I am online I'm mostly researching for work but, the sci-fi channel page and a comic feed site gets a bit of my attention too.
I have told you that this site is great and I tell all english speakers I know about it.
I am from Washington, USA
Thanks for all the work you put into this site.
...............................
A
male
reader, maxsteel86 +, writes (19 September 2006):
 The rating idea from Stina is good. But chatrooms are usually one good way of screwing things up real fast. Before you know it, everyone will have forgotten what this site is actually about!
Doing a great job pal!
From London, UK
...............................
A
female
reader, theskycastle +, writes (19 September 2006):
 Hi Andrew,I cannot express how much this site has helped me. I've started using this site less than a month ago, but I'm now a regular. I keep this page open while I'm at work. Constantly checking and reading updated entries. It's a nice way to read other people's problem, offer advice, and benefit advice from others. It's nice to see other people have many different point of views looking at the same problem.1. New feature:I like the idea of a chat room. It's very nice to see other agony aunt/uncle on this site. I feel there's this connection between us, yet not being able to converse with them is a little too bad. It's so comforting to see everyone on this site care about each other. I can see us being really good friends.Another suggustion is to have a section that we can update our relationship with a love me like a journal. There should be a button that you can access their journals under the response they give at any questions.2. I'm only on this site as it already keeps me busy reading new updated questions.3. I live in Canada.I will definitely spread the word about this site.
...............................
A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (19 September 2006):
Andrew, Stina's suggestion is great!! I am like that too, if someone rates my answer as poor, them I want to know why so I wont answer poor again if you see my point. Its not about being great or anything but as Stina said, it helps you to improve so you can help others. Also, sometimes I use a shared PC so on the moderator login the user IP may be the same for the one I use, but it doesnt necessarily mean I posted a particulary response, if you see what I mean? Just another thought.
...............................
A
female
reader, stina +, writes (19 September 2006):
 Hello Andrew :)
Well, I've been wondering if we could possibly see on our own pages what answers people have marked as being poor. I'm all for learning from my mistakes and improving my advice, but it's pretty hard to do if I don't know what was marked poor. I also agree with Bonym about the avatars being bigger. heh
The only other website that I visit pretty regularly is myspace. But this is the one that I visit the most. And I'm sure to tell people about it, too.
Oh, and I'm from Baltimore, Maryland, USA. :)
And I have to agree with the other aunts - I love this website, as well. Thank you!
...............................
A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (19 September 2006):
Hi Andrew I am a firm believer in spreading word!!!! I dont use any other sitem this one is suffice.
I am from Manchester, England, UK. I gave you a possible suggestion some time ago about about having feature pages for each agony aunt/uncle etc. That way everyone gets to know each other better, also can you make the avatars bigger, I am not a fan of photos myself but I think I appear better in larger photos, shows up better quality!!!! Just a thought!!!!
Keep up the good work Andrew. xxx
...............................
A
female
reader, Helen1986 +, writes (19 September 2006):
 Hi Andrew,
To be honest I never really visit any other sites, since I found this site I have found that I have become addicted. I love helping people with there relationship and sexual problems as I have experienced and overcome most myself. I also love asking for advice when I too need it.
I live in Portsmouth in England.
I think the site is great but how about setting up a chatroom for the use of regular agony aunts only. I know we can send eachother personal messages already but we have to wait for ages until we get our replies. Whereas if we had a chat room we could all discuss problems and get to know eachother better.
If someone had a problem we could chat with them and we may be able to advise them better. I love the site though keep up the good work.
...............................
|
