A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I like him so much we have loads in common and get on i cant stop thinking bout him and its driving me mad But he basically doesnt like me he he says theres nothing wrong with me but does not have the spark he needs in a relationship I said im happy being friends but deep down i want more i would do anything for him then and would still do anything for him now Im going to get this guy in the end even if i have 2 wait, he will prob end up with someother person but im determined to get him Its not like we have never done anything we have slept together about 5 times now but not since last year, But my question is How can i really get this guy start being ths person that im not, or carry on being myself which is what im doing Please any advice on what i can do
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female
reader, LolaBolla +, writes (9 May 2011):
 The thing is, even if you WERE to change, this guy wouldn't be in love with you, he'd be in love with someone else. And take this from a psychiatry student, it's not psychologically healthy to keep that up; you'll be miserable inside, even if you're "with" this guy because you KNOW it's not YOU he's in love with, but your alter ego. I agree with the answers above; I don't think it has anything to do with your personalities being incompatable, this guy's just a player. It seems like he wanted sex with no strings attached and he got it.If I were you, i'd ignore him and move on. The more you make yourself available to him and the more you make it known you want him, the more he'll take you for granted because he knows you'll jump whenever he tells you. Don't let this ingrate exploit you; spend your time on someone whose worth it.
A
female
reader, cocotte  +, writes (8 May 2011):
As hard as it might sound, you need to move on and forget about this guy. If you change just to get him, you will never be happy with yourself. If a man truly loves you, he will accept you the way you are. There are many men out there and you will find one that will accept you exactly as you are!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (8 May 2011):
I'm afraid you won't be getting him. It doesn't matter what you do, or how you change. He's made it clear you're not his type. There is nothing you can do about it. Also, I suspect that you've been slightly used by him too. He seems to have enjoyed the sex previously, but has now moved on.
Don't hang around looking desperate, because it'll do nothing for you. You simply can't make him interested.
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A
female
reader, RMeg  +, writes (8 May 2011):
Firstly , Pretending to be someone else is definitely no way to get this guy to like you. Don't pretend to be someone else, rather let him like you for who you are rather then who you trying to please. Its gonna be difficult to pretend to be something you not if he does feel attracted to you after you've pretended.
Another thing is he clearly dosnt wanna be with you if his said so, don't force something that's not their. Seeing as you have already slept with him and he still dosnt wanna shows a lot - His just not that into you.
Get over it and move on - You will find something better
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2011): The guy has told you, you are not his type, accept it and move on. One thing in life you should always be is yourself.
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