A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:There isn't a right or wrong answer to this - I am simply looking for people's opinions on what they would do in this situation.My friend decided to go to Venice at the last minute and invited me to go also. I declined because I doubted I could get the time off from work. In the end she booked her tickets and hotel, she told me that she booked a double room for two people, so if on the off chance I changed my mind the option was there for me to join her if I wanted. I thought it over and decided to ask my boss for the time off short notice not expecting to get it. To my surprise my boss agreed and she was pleased. I booked my tickets etc.Now she had never mentioned to me the cost of the room or that I needed to pay her for it, split bills etc. So I did not think about paying or splitting the room rate with her - the way I saw it is that she paid for the room in advance and she was going to use it whether I went or not, and of course she never asked or mentioned me paying for it or splitting etc. She was the one who wanted me to accompany her on this trip too as it was her idea.Anyway now I am beginning to wonder if perhaps I should be offering to pay it or split the bill with her. My other half says it is the morally "right" thing to do, and now I am in two minds about what to do. I mean, if I am honest, I really don't want to pay as finances are tight already and it is essentially her trip. Of course EVERYONE is just going to tell me to ask her what she wants to do and if she wants to split the bill - BUT the problem there is she may just say yes and I have to fork out for the hotel also and my finances are already tight. SO what would people think of this - would they assume it was paid for it and not say anything - as she hasnt asked or mentioned it ever - and she'd already booked it whether or not I was going......OR ask her if she wants to split it halfway (which of course means there is a liability she could say yes and then you have to fork out)NOT really looking for people to judge me morally here ok! Just curious about different views.ThanksSo
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2008):
******* HI I AM THE ORIGINAL POSTER ******
Ok not sure if this makes a difference but my friend is from another country. I am allowing her to stay with me here for free at my house - (she was going to book a hotel and I told her not to, that to stay with me for as long as she likes and save the money instead as hotels here are very expensive) I have cooked her meals everyday so she hasnt had to buy food and I pretty much drive her most places she needs to go. So essentially because of this - all she has had to spend money on during her stay was shopping for clothes, shoes, souvenirs etc.
She has already had to pay for the room in advance on her card as she booked it through a website. So it is already paid for. I did have a look also at the room and if she booked a single room for herself it would have only cost her 6 euros less per night than what she paid for the double room. And we are only going for a weekend so the double room just would have cost her 18 euros extra.
Anyway those were two other things I had considered about why I didnt think I would have been required to split the room rate with her. Anyway not sure if that makes a difference or not. But please post comments on if people still all agree I need to offer to split the hotel room rate with her and if it is considered rude if I dont.
Thanks
A
male
reader, askJAY  +, writes (18 December 2008):
 hmmm...first of all, it shouldn't really be a question. on the other hand, you say she almost casually just booked the double room on the off chance that you could join her? well, if she's your friend, you can casually ask how much you can contribute, explaining that things are tight, so you might have to pay a bit this month and a bit the next month,...that you are so pleased to share the experience with her that you convinced your boss to give you time off especially.
haha, excuse my vocabulary, but i was rambling on my thoughts...hope you can make some sense of my "opinion" LOL
:-)
enjoy the trip!
Ciao
P.S. if you don't speak about this to your friend, it'll be on your mind the whole time and possibly ruin it a bit for you.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (18 December 2008):
 It's better to be safe than sorry. I would split the bills.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2008): Good hotels always ask for payment at the end never in advanced. I don't know how much you travel but this is the case almost everywhere. id go halves thats only natural. it sounds as if cost is an issue... if it is and you feel uncomfortable about it dont go... just make sure the room is under her name and you havent provided any payment details yet.
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A
male
reader, karlgoo  +, writes (18 December 2008):
 i would atleast say something about it and offer to pay half or some of the trip. Don't worry about your finances that much it is only money and people survive on the street with no money still right? I am not saying that you should go to this extreme but I think that it is only money and you shouldn't worry about you not having enough. If you were that concerned about finances you would not go on a vacation like this whether travel and boarding costs were taking care of because Venice is very expensive I know because I have been there and before you know it you just spent 200 dollars
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A
female
reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (18 December 2008):
 Think it would be cool to offer to pay half and then if she declines then you havent lost nothing and have gained respect ...........
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