A
male
age
41-50,
*jdiverse
writes:I dated my ex for almost 3 years. she ended the relationship she said I didnt do anything wrong she just had fallen out of love but we both admitted that and that we loves eachother still just not in love. well weve been split up for over a year always kept in touch though. she wanted to start talking more and sleeping having sex together again. I asked whats it going to lead to she said she still loves me and would like to be together agaim one day but right now she aint ready for a relationship. shes forclosing on her house is having a major financial crisis and dont want to bring that into a relationship I understand that. shoulwe continue to talk and be sexual or should I just let her go?
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male
reader, 1jdiverse +, writes (31 March 2011):
1jdiverse is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanku to all who answered.
A
male
reader, 1jdiverse +, writes (31 March 2011):
1jdiverse is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell we agreed not to mess around with other people and have been sleeping around with eachother only thanku for the advice we love eachother but I just wish she was ready for a relationship im a sagitarious patience isent my best asset lol. shes a good woman but in the end I would be hurt if she changed her mind about getting back together that would hurt these types of things are so risky
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A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (30 March 2011):
 I think you should let her go. If you start sleeping with her it will never allow you to get over her and chances are you will miss out on a wonderful world of girls around you. It sound like she wants you to wait for her so she can decide whether to be with you or not which could leave you alone down the road.My policy is that you usually should never go back with an ex unless you know that the breakup was for stupid reasons and it never should have happened in the first place. If you two decided not to be with each other it was for a specific reason and if someone was hurt it tends to be too much to have those feelings associated with someone you are trying to love. If you want to be her friend and help her through this that is fine but that means no sexual contact and you shouldn't stop looking for other girls.
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A
male
reader, ReturningtheFavor +, writes (30 March 2011):
Let her go. I was in a 10 year relationship that went through these situations with loving each other but not being in love with each other anymore. You very rarely get that spark back once its gone, but the comfort and history you have with each other will cause you to wanna be together again. My guess is that it is over for you both you just have not completely accepted it (which is fine, normal, natural) My advice having been through it multiple times is, distance yourself. Chances are you will end up right where you were when it ended. My best advice follow your heart and use common sense, that little voice down deep really knows best, sometimess its hard to listen when we dont like its advice. Good Luck! Hope you both end up happy no matter what. :)
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (30 March 2011):
 If she isnt ready for a commitment then having sex with her might lead to resentment on both sides and really there is no need to be having sex if you arnt together.Also if you meet someone else while you are still having sex with her or she meets someone, it is possibly going to cause jealousy.Why dont you just be friends for now. That way you can be supportive but retain a little distance thats going to help you have a life of your own.
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