A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex-boyfriend and I had been gong out for a year and a half, and then about 5 months ago his 18 year old brother was diagnosed with leukaemia. We broke up about two months ago, when his brother starting to get really sick. Around this time my ex got arrested and is due in court any day now. I am not sure what he did, but I am sure that it was somehow a response to his frustration and anger at the probable loss of his brother. A month ago, his brother passed away. What would you recommend that I do? I want to give him the time and space that he needs to figure things out, but on the other hand I want to give him the love and support that he needs, because although I am his ex I still care about him a lot, especially as he is going through such hard circumstances.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 April 2010):
He is your ex, and under the other circumstances such as him getting arrested, right now it's best if you give him the space and let him make his own decisions in his own time. You don't want to end up being dragged into a mess. You're very kind for caring, but remember that he is an ex, and right now is in a bad place that he must deal with himself.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2010): tell him your there if he needs you, and not to hesitate to come to you. but you have to look after yourself darlin. you don't want to carry all of this on your shoulders.just let him know your there and then just let him be. i'm sure he'll appreciate that.
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A
male
reader, df30  +, writes (14 April 2010):
Tell him just what your feeling, let him know how you care for him and you want to be there for him, tell him that your there and if he does't want to talk right then leave him your number and say call whenever you want
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A
female
reader, Jumby +, writes (14 April 2010):
 aw hun this is an incredibly hard situation to be in, he is likely to want space however at the same time I'm sure he'd really appreciate that your there for him. What I would do is perhaps make or buy a small 'thinking of you card' just saying your thoughts are with him and the family, and should he ever need to talk or have some company your there. That way its a sensitive, thoughtful gesture that gives him space yet he knows that you care about him and your there and he knows where to find you.good luck and I hope things with the court case turn out ok
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