A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I'm 19 and i have a girlfriend that ran me down with my car beacause she thought I was cheating she is begging for my forgiveness. Now I love her but I may never use my legs again. Should I forgive her?????? please let me know! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (23 April 2007):
God NO,
She sounds very disturbed. I dont think I could ever forgive a person doing that to me.
I think that although she realises she has acted crazy, you cannot let a person do this to you. She could have killed you. Are you sure she didnt hit your head?.
To forgive that easy, is almost like saying it didnt matter what she did. What advice would you give if you were asked the same question.
I really hope you get better soon. Without this very scarry person.
A
female
reader, O Connor +, writes (23 April 2007):
first of all im really sorry about wat happened that is awful.i hopes she realised wat she did and apologised?!i dont think you should forgive her its her fault that ur life has changed.there is obviously something seriously wring with her and she needs to sort that out on her own and not bring you down.id be living in fear of someone who did that - think about it people leave their partners after one slap or hit - dont cave in she'll only think its ok to do this to people to get her own way.i hop you get well,and good luck in the future x
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2007): Why couldn't she just come out and "ask you" if you were cheating? Or even just left you? Why would you want anything more to do with a woman, who ran you over with a car when she 'assumed' you were cheating. She is a very out of control, potentially dangerous person. Now, we know she is psychologically damaged. But what about you? You love a woman who tried to 'kill you'? Your unhealthy feelings of love are making you blind and you are in a state of denial This is definitely domestic abuse as one aunt below, suggested. This is like a 'battered wife's' syndrome..where someone you love hurts you in a violent way but you deny, and minimize the real seriousness of what that person did. Please realize that denial is an extremely ill state of mind and can be tremendously difficult to break. So I suggest you find out why you don't value yourself enough to even consider.. loving such a person. She has shown you what she's capable of...for her to even have thought of 'running you over in a blind rage' tells you this woman needs serious help. You can't rescue her or change her. So should you forgive her? That is your decision. I wouldn't blame you if you said, you couldn't. She possibly crippled you for life, due to her uncaring, unloving and rather over the top behaviours. Sometimes just to make ourselves feel cleansed and to move forward in life, we can forgive people who have hurt us. But to continue to love them and want to continue a relationship with them...I'd say-- are you nuts? Think smart, guy. Take steps to get out of the position where you can never be hurt by this woman again.
...............................
A
male
reader, Blue Rat +, writes (3 April 2007):
She ran you down with your car because she THOUGHT you were cheating? Even if you were cheating, this is still an unfogivable and serious assault, but to do it just because she thought you might be, is nothing short of dangerously psychotic behaviour. Not only should you not forgive her or take her back, you should be pressing criminal charges. She's a dangerous pyschopath mate. Aside frompressing charges through the proper channels, you should have nothing whatsoever to do with her.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2007): No. She ran you over and tried to kill you just because she thought you were cheating on her. That's way over the top. If you decided to forgive her then you will regret it.
...............................
A
female
reader, PoSiOnKiSS +, writes (3 April 2007):
She is a complete psycho!! and to think she assumed you were cheating, whats going to happen next time she 'thinks' your cheating? well i honestly dont think theres anything worse she can do that mow u down with your own car! Your should not forgive, you should forget, and i mean as in forget her! what is with people these days?? i dont get it! what happened to the old slap around the face, oh no now you get run over! i say you need to keep well away from this girl because she is dangerous, if she can do it once, then theres no reason why she cant do it again! Hope your alright!!
...............................
A
female
reader, Aunt Charlene +, writes (3 April 2007):
no!! this is a form of domestic violence im glad you have spoken out as many men are too embarassed to admit they are being hurt by theyre gf/wife.if they know they can hurt you once and get away with it theres always the possibility theyll do it again,what makes it worse is she acted upon instinct rather than wait until there was instinct.so whether she loves you or not wont be going through her mind next time she gets angry. get out of this relationship whilst she hasnt broken your mind aswell,im ever so sorry what has happened and bid you good luck in the future xxx
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2007): i dont think she should forgive her. she needs to learn to mature up and have self control. you could have gotten even more injured, or even killed. her mindless and disgusting actions have deeply altered your life, and even though it probably was a mistake, she needs to learn from this to mature up and start acting like an adult.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2007): Wow. First of all can i say im really sorry about what happened. Its really tricky, its hard to say what you should do from not knowing all the facts e.g. why she came to this conclusion. but still her reaction cannot be justified- she could have killed you. you obviously love eachother and i dont think i could possibly tell you what to do. Right now you just have to look into the future, do you think you can forgive her for this? i think in your situation i wouldnt be able to, but its hard to say. Just remember that it is possible to find someone else if you do decide to leave her, but if you do stay with her will it be fair on you both? The resentment you may undoubtedly feel and her guilt? Maybe this is unrectifyable- or maybe it could make you stronger. i can't see how i could have helped as ive been so vague but i sincerly hope everything works out for the best. xxxxxxx
...............................
A
female
reader, neonpinkngooey +, writes (3 April 2007):
forgive her because you understand that people make crazy mistakes. as for getting back with her, it shouldnt even be an option. not right now, at least. give her time to mature a little more. lets face it: she needs to learn how to communicate a little better, and to do so, she has to experience more. good luck with your decision, and hope you feel better!
...............................
|