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Normal? He wants bj twice a day?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 February 2009) 12 Answers - (Newest, 3 February 2010)
A female Canada age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My boyfriend wants me to do bj for him twice everyday(at least once,but doesn't have to make him cum though), if we ever see each other in that day(we don't live together). I just want to know is it normal for guys or it's just he has too much sexual desire? cause I don't want to do bj that oftern and I don't actually like doing it at all. And even we are going to have sex, he wants me to give him bj first.

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A male reader, caterpillarchapstick United States +, writes (3 February 2010):

do it. he probably had an ex that did it and if you don't he will start thinking about her... ya dig?

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A male reader, AnalyzeIt United Kingdom +, writes (21 August 2009):

His desire is normal, but whether it's 'normal' to receive bjs that often shouldn't be an issue. Don't let it affect you either way. You can just work out between you what works for you two.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2009):

Yeah, it's normal, particularly if you're hot.

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A male reader, eddie Canada +, writes (14 February 2009):

eddie agony auntSure, a guy can want a blow job often. I mean it's not like getting stuck in the eye with a hot poker !! The fact is though, most of us men muster the courage to go on without getting fellatio twice a day. Is it abnormal to want sex...no. Is it common to get it that often for an extended period of time? I'm betting yes.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2009):

Cant even imagine what the response will be to this one LOL doesn’t really matter.

In my opinion, when you love someone you do things for them like go to a football game with him, even though you cant stand football, after doing this for some time and relishing how happy it makes him with you there you would want to carry on doing that because making him happy makes you happy, and I think that’s almost what your BF meant, but yea its not only one sided, as you say you use to think of it as gross, that could also mean that you don’t like doing it coz subconsciously its still Gross to you, and dirty…. But if you could look at it as an ice cream and eat it like an ice cream, dear then you wotn feel so grossed out by doing this, you also say that you don’t think you have sexual desires …. We all do, if you could just find that point where you think of sex and sexual acts as acts of pleasure, you should soon start enjoying it, I always say sex shouldn’t be about you wanting pleasure but you wanting to pleasure your partner, and since this is both of you’s first sexual experiences I would advise you speak to your BF and make sure that he understands this, you cant always give and not get, he needs to show you that he desires your full body not just your mouth, if you could get this out of the way now I am sure you would be fine, but try not to put a stigma onto it, otherwise

you wont enjoy it.

Good luck

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2009):

Thank you so much guys! All of your answers make me feel better. Now I know he demands for it and likes it is normal for guys. We are both the first girlfriend/boyfriend for each other and we are both virgins now. Before I date him,I know nothing about foreplay, sex and stuff and we had this problem since the beginning of our relationship. And he said I hurt him a lot for the first half year of our relationship of not showing interest at all in doing foreplay(bj actually, which it true, I didn't even know bj and I thought it was so gross and dirty). So he correlated me of not interested in him.

Since then we communicate over and over again of how I thought of bj and why I didn't like it(it's mainly because of my background of education and culture, that's also why we haven't had sex yet). Then we both agree to compromise a little bit but I still have to do it. Bascially, he said he wants me to do bj to him not only because he needs pleasure, but also because he wants to feel I am willing to pleasure him that I care about his emotions and pleasure and ect.

He does like to do 69, but I not a big fan of doing it neither, sometime I think maybe I am type of girl that doesn't have sexual desires, and sometime I think there is nothing wrong for him to ask for bj and love bj, and there is nothing wrong for me not liking doing it, we are just not right for each other.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (12 February 2009):

Honeypie agony auntI agree with Gina nad Phil. You need to tell him you aren't that big of a fan of the whole giving BJ's. However most men love and adore getting one and some of us women love giving them.

Sex should be good for both parties. It shodl be fun for both parties. I suggest you read "Tickle his Pickle" and if you are game, start having fun with the BJ part. But on your terms, when YOU want to.

But yeah it's normal for a guy to want to gt BJ's whenever he can.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2009):

Ok im gona get a poor rating on this but who cares

I don’t really agree with the fact that he is using you dear… if he want oral before sex isn’t it like you needing foreplay? How would you like it without foreplay? If he just had to stick it in without even getting you there, yea men don’t require foreplay like we do, but girl if your boy likes it, he does like 90% of other men, you haven’t given any other indications of this guy mistreating you except for you not liking it, have you told him you don’t like it? What was his reaction? Did he say he would leave if he doesn’t get it? Think about… if that’s the case then I guess so many of us girls are being used LOL, I seriously don’t think so,,,, try the 69 you might find that rewarding for you both.

Hope to hear from you soon

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A male reader, tra40d United Kingdom +, writes (12 February 2009):

tra40d agony auntNice one, Gina!

Either get him to go down on you repeatedly throughout the day, or maybe blow him time after time when you are with him - wear him out and make him sick of it?

I know that's quite a burden on you, as you dislike doing it, but soon he will fail to rise to the occasion and probably feel humiliated - don't let that stop you, insist that you continue to blow him; after all, that's what he wants. isn't it?

And yes, he IS using you.

Ron.

65.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2009):

There's a huge difference between making love and simply having sex and I'm sure you can figure out the difference for yourself.

It's normal for him to want you to do this for him, but it's not normal for you to do it if you neither want to do it or even enjoy it. Whether you like it or not, you must be good at it for him to want it twice a day!

It might come as a bit of a shock to him, but you really need to tell him you don't like doing it, and if he's a decent sort of man he'll accept that and do without until or unless you actually want to do it spontaneously. He seems to be focusing on his own pleasure and not caring too much about yours, but he's not a mind reader and he won't know you find the activity unpleasant unless you tell him.

Making love is supposed to be fun for both partners, but clearly this is not the case in your situation. What's the point of doing it if you don't enjoy it? If he can't do without, perhaps it's time you had a change of boyfriend. It must be a real downer when going to visit him thinking that as soon as you step through his door he's going to demand a blowjob! There's more to life than that.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2009):

If you don't like it, you don't have to do it everyday! No wonder your getting fed up with it, you already don't like doing it and your being made to do it twice a day every day?? just stop. If you can't tell him no once in a while, you shouldn't be in a sexual relationship.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2009):

Shame I posted a question like this a while ago, and after reading opinions on it, and thinking about it nicely I actually feel better bout the whole thing… men are way more open about what they want and like then us girls… we tend to think out men can read minds, we want them to know exactly what to do, but with guys its so different if he loves blows he’ll ask for it, coz he likes it… so if there is something you want tell him, be straight forward about it, try out a 69 you’ll both benefit from that, I know what kinda thought are running through your head, doesn’t he like having sex with me, does he prefer the blow over me? And you are trying to think about all these things and they lead to more and more doubt about yourself. Yes some men like this very very much and yea some of us girls love doing it to but not all the time, and if that’s how you feel you need to talk to him, tell him its not that you don’t like doing it, just that you would like to try something else… do other things or you can even just indicate this before he says anything else, but it would be better to talk to him you might actually find out that he understands, and that he would be willing to do other things as well.

Good luck dear, and make him work for you 2 tell him what you want and how you want it, you might be surprise by his response

xx

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