A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey, so i just moved into a new place and right next door is a perfect woman for me. She's beautiful smart and can cook (what else does a man wants right?) She just got out of a relationship and I want to be the next and final guy she will be with...I know that it's bad to date neighbor but an opportunity like this have never happen to me, ever. I don't know what to do, confess my affection to her only make things awkward if she doesn't feel the same but at the same time it's gonna suck watching her going for the next guy. I sure i'm leaving stuff out but what do i do?
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female
reader, Cheeks +, writes (18 May 2011):
 I don't know, maybe you should approach the situation with a "you know I'm right" kind of attitude towards the topic. But nothing real solid dealing with the future or near future especially. Maybe phrase it like, "You know we're made for eachother, so I'll give you some time to get over this last relationship before I make any more moves on you...because good things are worth waiting for." Then give her space. Back off for a bit. Let her think about that for a while. I don't know. But don't put any pressure on her for some sort of commitment or promise for anything later. That's what she's avoiding, commitment. But just be cool, that's cheesy but true. Act like she'd be missing out if she doesn't eventually give you a chance. Like I said last time or at least should have said is don't dwell on her because that will make you appear needy and or silly. She's not lying when she says she doesn't want another relationship. That's true too and besides, its never a good idea to jump from one into another anyway.Good luck.
A
female
reader, cupidus  +, writes (4 May 2011):
 Oooo, you're the day guy. Not good, that's like being friends and not lovers, you better smooch her soon!
Need to give her the night guy mode before all is lost.
Lovey Dovey Baby... soon.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the reply cheeks...
yesterday she jokingly said, i'm like her day husband, she should go find a night husband. I know that she only said that because we watch a tv show and the woman in the show have two husband one day (gay) and one night. I told her i don't play that game, and not gonna be that guy again since haven't been there before...she said i took that too seriously...I know i shouldn't take it too seriously but it hit home for me. Is there anyway to ask her if there's a future between us without her answering "i just got out of a relationship, and not ready for another one" speech? if there's any advise on how i would get her would be greatly appreciated.
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A
female
reader, Cheeks +, writes (30 April 2011):
So now what? Well now it's time to just let things go the way nature takes it. You said you like her, she knows how you feel, now then leave it at that. Pressure may just scare her off. Don't become overly involved in her life then she'll feel obligated to date you. Just let her have her time to herself and be a supportive friend and neighbor. Good luck again Dude.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the responses...the crazy part is she still took the vacation that she planed to take with her man...since they broke up, me and her hung out everyday for a week. That's not good is it? We gotten to know each other a lot, i mean i feel like we hang out more then a normal couple see each other. our doors are open for each to walk in at anytime. I told her how i feel about her but her response was the same and normal response that would come from anyone that just got out of a relationship. "I got got out of a relationship, i need to focus on me right now, and all of that good stuff" what now? Thanks for your response
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A
female
reader, TamyKarcz  +, writes (17 April 2011):
 I say Go for it! After all you'll never know what life has in store for ya! Though if you really have not talked to her, or simply don't know her that well... the best thing would be to approach the small-steps technique! She's your neighbor after all.. so someday.. out of the blue... ring at her door, and ask for sugar/flour (since she knows how to cook/bake) and say you run out of it.. small steps bring you far my friend!Good luck! ^_~
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A
female
reader, Cheeks +, writes (17 April 2011):
Go for it.
If she turns you down or things get weird, oh well I say.
I mean, what's the worst that could really happen? You wind up with a neighbor you try to avoid? Well, that's how 4 out of 5 people in feel anyway, happens everyday so no big deal.
But what you don't see very often is someone who has his dream girl move in next door.
I think it would be a shame if you don't at least ask her on a date.
Don't worry about rejection. If she does, just look at it like any other neighborly dispute and let your dog shit in her lawn every once in a while.
But, really, don't worry and just go for it.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (17 April 2011):
 Is there something real between you? Have you ever actually had a chance to get to know each other? Start there, just go for it and ask her out on a date, then, see if there is even a spark of potential to be found there.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, Batterytea +, writes (17 April 2011):
 Alright, well, she's just got out of a relationship, so you've gotta just approach her!! When I broke up with my boyfriend I was super sad and mopey for quite a while, and I just wanted to vent and find someone else. You can be that someone else for her!
When she's tending the garden or mowing the lawn or something, go and ask if she'd like help. She'll get the impression that you're a nice guy! Then you can make small talk. She can cook so maybe talk about that, and maybe say something like "Maybe you can teach me how to cook sometime".
Don't confess until you're positive she likes you back! :)
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A
female
reader, cupidus +, writes (17 April 2011):
Well ask her out and I mean out, not over to your house and not to hers for a home cooked meal. Sure it's nice to have beauty, smarts and an oven. But you'll have to find out if she has what your soul craves not the flesh nor the gut.
A date like we all do.
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